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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

my dd's teacher is OK in having an affair with one of the class parents

251 replies

tilbatilba · 05/09/2007 09:39

We have been travelling for a few months and have just returned to our very quiet little town to discover the grade 4 teacher, Ms X, is having an affair with the mother of one of the children in the class.
It is now a very public affair. The female teacher wants to remain in her job. The mother of 4 that is in the relationship is OK about everything. The father of the 4 children is furious and legal action is pending.
What would you do? The child in the Gr 4 class is well aware of everything and the family is in a mess.
My dd is due to join this class very soon. The betrayal of trust is beyond belief. My dd has been at the school for 4 yrs and very happy.
The issue is ...my trust of the gr 4 teacher is shattered. The unions are suppporting her and she intends to stay....she is very cold and hard....I think I should be looking for a different school
xx

OP posts:
LaCod · 05/09/2007 09:41

omg how terrible
did you knwo they were gay?
did hte mum wear dungarees?

LaCod · 05/09/2007 09:41

cant imagine who id sleep wiht out of the dsses teachers if i HAD TO

ishouldbeironing · 05/09/2007 09:42

small towns you wouldnt get that in a city

BecauseImWorthIt · 05/09/2007 09:42

What on earth difference should it make to how she teaches your child?

YABU

Mercy · 05/09/2007 09:44

What do you mean by betrayal of trust?

LilyLoo · 05/09/2007 09:45

yabu What has the teachers personal life got to do with the parents?
If she is a good teacher and it is a good school this will make no difference to your dd. As for 'the betrayal of trust' i am not sure how that can be relevant to you, obviously to the father and the children yes !

Hulababy · 05/09/2007 09:46

Certainly doesn't seem a professional way of going about things. And to have the affair as public knoweldge, playe dut int he open, for all to see if not ideal.

I don't think it will affect the way your child is taught at school however. Although I am not sure I'd be impressed if my child's teacher was doing this - rumours are bad enough, the playground will be rife with gossip!

"she is very cold and hard...." - this sounds like you may have had issues or worries about this teacher previously???

Boco · 05/09/2007 09:46

What actual difference will it make to your child and her schooling. Sounds sad for any family to be going through a messy break up, but i'm not sure how relevant that is to the teachers ability to teach. I would only consider moving if she was a shocking teacher, doesn't really matter who she's seeing in her own time.

lou33 · 05/09/2007 09:48

i thnk the only difference it would make would be to the child directly involved, and the immediate family

purpleduck · 05/09/2007 09:49

I don't understand the "betrayal of trust". Would her teaching abilities be any different if she wasn't a lesbian? Its only a big deal deal if people turn it into one, and the woman is probably "cold and hard" because of these reactions to her personal life. I truly don't see what the problem is...unless the parent wasn't seperated from her husband yet, in which case, its an issue between them. I bet everything dies down by half term.

Wisteria · 05/09/2007 09:50

Yes I think YABU - I feel for the children involved as it must be difficult for them to be at the same school as their Mother's partner regardless of the sexual preference being out in the open, but can't see what on earth it has to do with you or any of the other parents - I can't see why it would affect her teaching.

Baffy · 05/09/2007 09:50

Is she a good teacher?

Betrayal of trust to the dh and children involved - I understand that. Awful for them
But surely it's nobody else's business.

Hulababy · 05/09/2007 09:51

I don't think the sexual preference of the teacher/parent involved is relevant at all BTW.

LaCod · 05/09/2007 09:52

or style of dunagrees?

lou33 · 05/09/2007 09:53

the teachers at my kids schools are all unappealing, i cant imagine anyone looking twice at any of them

LaCod · 05/09/2007 09:54

shag or die lou

expatinscotland · 05/09/2007 09:54

I would do nothing.

I have other things to worry about than other peoples' sex lives.

lou33 · 05/09/2007 09:55

die

strangely i do know some teachers who are very attractive, it's just none ever work around my children

SauerKraut · 05/09/2007 09:56

Gah. Reminds me of what's wrong with village life.

LaCod · 05/09/2007 09:57

we have 4 men to choose fom
but in reality

shag or die

theres only one under 30

lou33 · 05/09/2007 09:59

oh shit if i die though who will have my kids?!

hmmmm....god what a dilemma

zippitippitoes · 05/09/2007 10:06

a dilemma i don't have..either of them actually how weird I am free to die

heifer · 05/09/2007 10:07

cod - what is wrong with shagging a bloke over 40 - I do it everyday

Well obviously not EVERY day...

heifer · 05/09/2007 10:07

30 even (although DH is over 40)

Hulababy · 05/09/2007 10:09

Only one male teacer to choose from at DD's school. And I really don't want to go there, although he is a nice pleasant bloke, but not for me!

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