DH asked me to take underwear pics at work

[AdalbertWaffling]

So today I get a text from DH asking for me to go and take some pics of me in my underwear in the loos at work and send them to him. I replied "No... X". Firstly I was super busy so didn't have time, secondly I can't think of anything less sexy than taking my top off in a toilet cubicle and trying to take a selfie, and thirdly I'M AT WORK so really didn't feel like it was appropriate.

I have now asked him something else and just got back "No... X", so he's obviously pissed off at my response, or lack of. Tbh knowing him he probably would have been fine with me saying no by laughing it off, or in a way that didn't make him feel bad for asking. I'm really not sure if IABU here! I don't think I was in that I was at work, but also we're in a loving relationship and maybe I should have been a bit kinder in my response? Or maybe I should have just nipped off for 2 mins, taken a selfie and not been such a prude???

YANBU just talk about it later x

I wouldn't have done it.

Absolutely not!

I'm lost for words. I don't know what work you do, but if my colleagues/employees were whipping into the toilets to take/send photos .... grim. Unprofessional. Inappropriate.

You don't exist to satisfy anyones fantasy.

Stand your ground

yuk

Sorry that's just weird ... work is for work surely. Am I really that behind the times? I have made personal calls and sent texts but they are things that actually are quite urgent (well important eg which flight time ) not chit chat

Ummmm....no, not an appropriate thing to do at work.

TBF my reaction may be coloured by the fact that I work in primary education- taking a lewd snap while working there would land you in big trouble. But still, no.

Grim

I suppose the intended tone isn't clear. He may have meant it jokily, or half seriously and then think he's being silly by matching your 'No...x' reply later on.

You need to have an actual face to face conversation and see what happens. If he's cross or defensive then he's being very out of order.

Utterly inappropriate. I would have told him to fuck right off. No way would I even consider doing that.

Just no.

You can’t be forced to take nudes if you don’t want to.

I would take a normal selfie or a normal mirror pic but not something like that.

Public toilets (inc at work) are grim. I wouldn’t physically be able to undress take a nice sexy pic in a smelly/filthy bathroom with nasty sounds emanating from the cubicle next door! Where would you have even placed your top, I mean there’s nowhere sanitary for it to rest and then you’d have to place it back on after 🤢

Does he usually ask you to do this sort of thing? Yanbu for not doing it, or not wanting to.

He could just be joking with the No...X. If my DH wrote that in response it’d be light hearted. Then again mine wouldn’t ask me to strip in the loo haha.

Does he call you a prude?

No. It's not your purpose in life.

does he often ask you to do such sleazy things?

Not appropriate

Honestly that's just weird.

Where I work if I did what he suggested I could be sacked for gross misconduct. YANBU.

This is really grim.

Is this the sort of relationship you have or did this come completely out of the blue?

If the latter id seriously be concerned. If the former, and you’ve previously done this, then you were not unreasonable to say no on this occasion.

Have you sent him those sort of pics before?

Completely unreasonable ... unless you work in a lingerie shop.

YANBU, and he was BVU asking you to do something so unprofessional at work. I'd ask him this evening why he sent that text. I'd really want to know! You can always laugh it off afterwards.