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AIBU?

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Original poster

to ask if you had sex on your wedding night?

256 replies

SantaBabyBoo · 21/12/2018 23:03

Getting married in the near future, and I'm already pretty certain there will be no shagging on the wedding night. Sex is quite infrequent anyway (but this suits us), and after a long day I know we will both be too tired.

Until a coversation today, I thought it was normal to not consummate marriage on the actual wedding night. A few friends have said it is extremely odd to not, and is something you have to do on your wedding day for 'tradition'.

I am no virgin, so I don't see the big deal. I would prefer a cuppa and Dairy Milk.

OP posts:
MirandaWest · 21/12/2018 23:03

We didn’t. Did the next morning

kaytee87 · 21/12/2018 23:04

We were out dancing until 4am having a brilliant time. Had sex the next morning.
I don't particularly like sex at bedtime tbh, that's for sleeping 😂

Mumoftwoyoungkids · 21/12/2018 23:04

We did. We had said we wouldn’t as didn’t fancy the pressure but then got in the mood.

OnlineAlienator · 21/12/2018 23:04

Um, cant remember! We were pretty tired and shagged all the time anyway so possibly not.

TicketyBoo83 · 21/12/2018 23:04

Nope, we were both a bit drunk and totally exhausted. He was sound asleep before I’d managed to get the 7 million Kirby grips out of my hair 😂

Mammylamb · 21/12/2018 23:04

Nope. We were both very drunk, tired and had my hair extensions to pull out. We waited until the honeymoon

CheshireSplat · 21/12/2018 23:04

We didn't. DH was tired so wanted to go to bed (rare for him) and I wasn't ready for bed so stayed up opening cards and drinking cider! Grin

parietal · 21/12/2018 23:05

yes

19lottie82 · 21/12/2018 23:05

We had a half arsed attempt at it. We were knackered but thought we should give it a bash due to tradition! It wasn’t very sexy though and we gave up after a few minutes and went to sleep 😂

lunar1 · 21/12/2018 23:06

I, I was bloody knackered

Lwg87 · 21/12/2018 23:06

Nope

honeylulu · 21/12/2018 23:06

Yes. Didn't have an evening party though (just a party for two!)

FuzzyPixel · 21/12/2018 23:06

We did.

Ellisandra · 21/12/2018 23:06

I’ve read reports of surveys that say lots (I think more than half) said they didn’t.

I didn’t with H#1 - but he was shit at sex Hmm
H#2 - we did, but not until 4am and I was shattered - I think it was a point of honour for us both Grin

lunar1 · 21/12/2018 23:06

That should have said no, not I!

peachgreen · 21/12/2018 23:07

No, I had the flu coming, he was recovering from a chest infection and we'd ended the night at 3am sheltering from a thunderstorm in a gazebo waiting for the night manager to unlock the hotel room door! It was still an absolutely magical day and I'm just glad we both made it through before we collapsed. The next day I was so ill I couldn't even hold a mug and he had to feed me tea and toast in bed - truly testing the in sickness and in health thing!

Amazonian27 · 21/12/2018 23:07

Yes we definitely did it was important to us both and had it again the next morning.

FestiveNut · 21/12/2018 23:07

Yep.

FittonTower · 21/12/2018 23:07

Our wedding was about 10 weeks after our first child was born, she didn't sleep. My parent's had her for that one night, only night we've had without children now for over 6 years. Yes. Yes we did....

JustABetterPlayer · 21/12/2018 23:07

Yes, your wife will never look more beautiful than on the wedding day, hence make the most of it 😄

AnotherEmma · 21/12/2018 23:08

It's "tradition" to have sex on your wedding night because it was "tradition" not to have sex or live together before getting married. If you're waiting for marriage before having sex, of course you'll jump on each other as soon as you can once married.

But now most people have sex before getting married, there's no rush to have sex on your wedding night is there?

AndNoneForGretchenWieners · 21/12/2018 23:08

No. DH was drunk, and we had to get up at 3am to go to the airport, so we didn't for a few days after the wedding.

TheNavigator · 21/12/2018 23:09

Yup, snuck up to the bridal suite during the reception & snuck back down to continue dancing- ‘‘twas fab.

3boysandabump · 21/12/2018 23:09

No we didn't we were both absolutely knackered and by the time I got out of my dress he was snoring

HildaZelda · 21/12/2018 23:10

Nope. I was on antibiotics for a chest infection the day we got married and was feeling rotten. Nookie was the last thing on my mind that night. I just wanted to go to sleep.
Years ago it was probably a big deal, but realistically there aren't too many people who are still virgins until marriage these days I'd imagine.