If pets had AIBU?

[recklessruby]

I am a year and a half old tabby girl cat. Aibu in thinking my human should stay here with me on her lap even though she is bursting to go to the toilet?
Aibu in thinking I should be allowed to sit on top of the laptop when she's working or on mn?
She's a nice owner but she keeps doing things that don't involve stroking me!

AIBU to think mummy should just let me play in amongst this nicely folded laundry, rather than shooing me away as if I am being some kind of inconvenient pest?

Posiedog - AIBU to go batshit crazy barking like the hounds of hell when someone rings the front doorbell but if someone walks in the back door assume they are my friend and lie in front of them so they may stroke my belly?
AIBU to bring dead animals especially birds to my humans? After all it's in my nature. A bit of gratitude would be nice.

PuzzledCat:

AIBU to spend ALL my time in the posh house's huge garden when I've got a perfectly good one of my own?

AIBU to leave my kills on top of mum's laptop, as a nice "treat" for her to find in the mornings?

AIBU to show off the way my black minge contrasts embarrassingly with my white fur by shoving it in everyone's faces?

Cat 1: AIBU to meow at the front door until mum let's me in only to run through the house & out of the back window again then repeat?

Cat 2: AIBU to use my litter tray perfectly 90% of the time and then when mum is running late, do a big shit over the edge of the tray instead?

** poop over the side of the tray and then watch mum have to chase the pup round the kitchen because he's tried to eat it off the floor. 😷

All cats:

IDCIIABU (I don't care if I am being unreasonable) to want to END THE HUMANS AND ALL THEY STAND FOR.

Oh, except the tuna they do in cans. And cheese. We'll keep a few around to provide those. Then, after a good gorge and a quick 6-hour nap, DEATH TO ALL HUMANS

WEll just hurled up a furball on the kitchen floor and did not put cones around the affected area to warn my slave of where she should not be putting her pigs trotters down.

I mean what is a cat to do!

I know... just sit here and watch her clean it up with a scrunched up face of disgust.

She better get a move on I am starving and apparently pawing at my bag of chicken mince is only annoying her more.

alligatorsmile

That would not be true of our boys. Jayda, maybe, but not Biggie and Gatsby. Biggie practically worships his Daddy, not to mention he doesn't like tuna or any other human food. (He will drink tuna water very happily but will not eat the actual tuna.) He also has almost no hunting instinct. One time Gatsby damaged a screen and he and Jayda got out while Biggie stayed in the house - I don't think it ever occurred to him to try to get out. We adopted Gatsby at 2 months old. He was rejected by his mother at birth and was hand-reared following that. He promptly decided I'm his mum and loves to come to me for attention.

I'm a dog and a very good boy. I am very sensitive though and cry at the thought of my humans leaving me behind. Aibu to push past them to make sure I get out first and aren't left?

Also the older humans keep leaving my brother and sister in a strange building full of other small humans. Aibu to call the warden and report them for leaving them alone all day?

Cat 1: AIBU to piss in my water bowl to send my human a message?

Cat 2: AIBU to scream at my human for the entire time she’s opening my breakfast/dinner because she’s taking too long?

Ddog2 - AIBU to bark my silly fool head off when any of the following happen:

Someone comes to the house.
Someone rings the doorbell.
The postman or paper boy post something through the door.
Someone walks past the house on the pavement.
The neighbours walk/drive up to their own house.
The bin men empty the bins.
The window cleaner washes the window.
Any member of the family comes into the house.

Or at absolutely nothing at all.

I know IANBU to bark at any and all of these.

JRT: AIBU to expect my owner to realise that if I want to lie on her, I will and if she wants to move I will probably bite her? 🤔

Fluffy Cat here

AIBU to sit on the neighbours doorstep all day everyday, causing them to have to step over me to get in their house? I have my own doorstep with fancy mat to sit on, but I prefer theirs.

Also it can't be unreasonable of me to go into NDN's house and eat their cats food can it? I have invited them to return the favour at my house, if they don't like the flat faced shouty mutts that's their problem not mine, right?

I stare and stare and stare. Is it really so unreasonable to think that my staring will get me the treat/walk that I want, dare I say NEED! AIBU to think this is my life too?

I love this thread! Aibu to sniff my dinner offering then scratch the floor like I’m trying to bury it?

AIBU - I'm a dog that loves to cuddle into my owner. She loves it and so do I. She's always saying I'm too big to sit on her and makes me move (I'm only 6 stone so light as a feather really) I'm not happy that she always wants me to sit or lie beside her and not ON her. How do I get her to accept me lying over her and her baby bump? My 3 other dogs friends are lying all over the floor but I prefer the couch.

Apocalyptic Horse -

AIBU? She bought me some new shoes- £65 apparently 🤔 I was so overcome with gratitude that on the way back to the field, I took a wee detour and dragged her through the muckheap. 💩

There's no pleasing some folk...

AIBU to gnaw through the guyropes on my slave’s belltent?

The inconsiderate so and so put it up on MY land, on MY grass. How dare she. The guyropes were on my high speed rabbit track and were a hazard, so I bit through them.

Now she has said I’m grounded and have to stay in my run. Who is being unreasonable (hint-not me)

I am a 10 month old very naughty black and white kitten. My favourite activity is climbing these amazing long bits of material hanging at the windows, it's sooooo much fun especially when I swing backwards and forwards from one paw!!
The thing is every time I get up there my human shouts no and lifts me off! She then dangles a pathetic little toy mouse in my face. I mean as if that's gonna be as much fun!! AIBU to want to act out my Tarzan fantasies on the curtains??

Cat Bunz: Aibu to race out the front door and throw myself into the path any (other) woman I see approaching? I roll around on my back, inviting them to stroke the soft fur on my tummy. Imma lover, not a fighter but mai human accuses me of inconstant affections. Wtf?

Hi, doggy type here. My question is should I ltbs? They know I don't like going for a walk , well until I start on one, then I lufs it. I hid with my Nan today ( she never takes me for a walk, I lufs her,but she never takes me for a walk😠😠) but the sod dobbed me in!! Told them where I was hiding. I hate her. I should ltbs shouldn't i? But if I do, who would\ wouldn't take me for a walk? So confused

10 month old rabbit:

Am I being unreasonable to run into my human's bedroom, hide under the bed and refuse to come out just as she's leaving for work? It's my favourite room and it is MY house after all. I think it's very good of me to let the human live there too. She says something about me not being allowed in there because she can't trust me not to chew the plug cords or tear the wallpaper. Honestly, my human is so ungrateful! I was redecorating!

AIBU to be really annoyed about MN being swamped by so called superior beings (🐱) complaining about their humans?
When the real world is coming to an end as we (🐕) are not allowed to chase them away anymore? Com on MN this is animal correctness gone mad!

My (elderly) dog:

AIBU to get my own place? We just moved and my dpeople bought this house with no carpets. All great you might think but FFS I can’t jump on the sofa now without being lifted, and they moan when I sit there talking to them asking them to help me! The amount of times I’ve tried and landed in a heap 😡. Oh, and forget jumping off the sofa to go and savage the post at full speed (which admittedly isn’t a lot at 14yrs old!), I’m either sliding in to the door or running and not going anywhere! AIBU to look in to getting my own retirement flat? They can keep my adopted sister quite happily.

Dying of laughter at these stories. Thank you for them all says Ellie.
Ellie says aibu to be sick of my human calling me Nelly? It's Eleanor for God's sake or Ellie not bloody nelly noo noo. I kid you not that is what she shouts when she calls me in.