To think you should not comment when someone breaks wind

[ididNOTfart]

Very embarrassing, colleague said oh ugh someone's farted and looked at me! AIBU to think this was rude??

Very rude.

They could at least have given you a score out of 10.

Was it you?

They farted! Definitely a clever deflection. As they say, "he who smelt it dealt it".

But yes, in Debretts it clearly states that it is non-U to mention another person's arse-emissions.

Put a whoopee cushion on her chair. It's the only adult and responsible option here.

No, not me but there were 3 of us so I either had to take the blame for horrible smell or embarrass colleague! I think you should just suffer in silence like I did when these things happen!

Not as rude as farting in company!

Did you?

It's a sad arse that never rejoices.

I am appalled Mumsnet are just interested in whether I farted or not. Flounce.

She who eulogized it aerosolized it.

it was probably me, ive had the farts all day

Oh, cross post. No, it's every woman for herself when there's a rogue fart about. If you keep a dignified silence you could get blamed.

'Whoever smelt it dealt it'
Is the correct response. Or FO.

It will have been her covering up for her shame.

Get a PUG if you fart you just blame the dog, I have 2 who can fart for England if I let out a botty burb I just say in a loud voice phew Arnie or Wilma (who ever is nearest) that's DISGUSTING. Works every time

Well it's rude to f*rt in company but not everyone has great anal sphincter control so rude to comment also. Unpleasant all round.

I ate lentil soup followed by onion bhaji last night. Fart? I'll talk to you about fart! Tore a foot long rip in the sheets last night!

I have pretty awful farts and whenever I try to get away with it in public DD1 points it out by shouting "Urgh mummy, that's a really stinky fart!" DD2 is only 11 months and can't stand up for herself yet so sometimes I blame her.

YANBU.

I believe the correct workplace etiquette is to grab the nearest folder and use it to vigorously waft said anal excretion in the direction of least favoured colleague.

The one who denied it supplied it.

No! You do it then point at DD1/2 or 3 and say "OI stinker say excuse me!"

Works wonders

Screeching with laughter here

I honestly never realised until I read a MN thread on the subject that us peoples are divided between those who can genuinely control their farts, and those of us who genuinely cannot.

I come in the latter camp and was always mystified by people who said you should "leave a room " before you fart, or that they had never farted in front of a partner. For those of us who have no warning whatsoever that a fart is imminent before it emerges, can you imagine how confusing that is?

Anyway, now my enlightenment is complete, I think it is bad form to comment as you never know whether the farter is a rude bastard who has control and couldn't care less, or someone who had no idea what was about to happen

Or, in my case, a vegetarian with a mild lactose intolerance...it's pretty hard to hold 'em in!