To think you should not comment when someone breaks wind

[ididNOTfart]

Very embarrassing, colleague said oh ugh someone's farted and looked at me! AIBU to think this was rude??

I once managed to blame a particularly malodorous emission on an unsuspecting pupil, by quickly extricating myself from the vicinity before the blast hit
Poor kids were begging me to own the windows. I even managed to feign indignation, saying "Oh for goodness sake! There's no need for that! You should leave the room if you have to."
Whist I silently cackled to myself 😂

I would have very loudly said 'it wasn't me!!!' whoever smelt it dealt it.. Clearly the one who called it!

Whoever doubted it, sprouted it

Laughing to myself at the memory of it

I'm a vegetarian and I do think this particular diet lends itself to a certain profligacy with the bottomly gaseous eructions . One tries not to do it in church, for instance, but mostly you just have to let it go and search desperately for someone else to blame. Either that or shamelessly own it. I'm happy to do that at home as the family are writhing on the floor clutching at their windpipes!

But was it a noisy one? I thought the rules were that if it makes a noise you acknowledge it, if its a silent smelly one you politely ignore.

We have a hound whose farts are straight from the bowels of Hell. DH tries to blame all on him, but the truth is, canine guffs - to the trained nose - smell different from human gut gasps. So he (DH) is fooling noone.

I'm screenshotting these sayings, for the benefit of my 9 year old ds 😝

Duchesse I made HFW's Kale and Mushroom Lasagne, last week.

I have never farted so copiously or impressively in my life.

Whoever denied it, supplied it.

We blame the dog even if she is not in the room !

Leave the room?

I once farted outside and the smell followed me!

Dh swore the air turned green.

It was a pretty bad one though

My DD1 is becoming highly skilled at Silent but Deadly. We'll be sitting on the bus when suddenly I smell a terrible smell. I turn to her with a piercing gaze, and a big smile spreads over her face...the wicked child!

I farted a real Silent but deadly one in an up market shop - the staff were saying "the drains must have over flowed"

I nearly wet myself as well!!

Banned myself from the shop!

Reminds me of the time that I reached up to a high shelf in Paperchase and let out one hell of a rattler.

ouryve - that sounds rather delicious! And with added benefits. I think that's one for the weekend - should guarantee me a little much needed solitude the following day!

Reminds me of the time that I reached up to a high shelf in Paperchase and let out one hell of a rattler

I'm afraid I let slip a hot and silent one in Lidl this afternoon. I'm not proud of myself but I did find the queue moved a lot quicker all of a sudden!

We took our dog into Cafe Nero once and she let a deadly one go. People who had just sat down on table behind hadn't seen the dog as she was under the table but they were gave my husband the 'look'

I let out a silent but very deadly at the -very crowded- self-service checkouts in Sainsbury's. Even my eyes were watering when ds1 announced very loudly 'pew, Mummy, was that you? It smells like one of yours!'

Ladies, there is no comeback to that.

I was standing in a queue once with ds. I smelt a fart and knew it was him from his proud little face. A few seconds later an old couple standing behind us said 'ooh can you smell that, its making me hungry' 😀

You trumped, you got caught, own it.

Was it louder than you thought it was going to be?

Whoever rapped it clapped it - says DS1.

LaConnerie

And OhWot - brilliant!

Whoever refuted it, distributed it.

(That took me ages )