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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be worried about friend leaving her baby alone/?

187 replies

AwfulMaureen · 24/12/2013 00:15

Go easy...my friend is attending a big family Christmas in a restaurant near to her home....the house is 2 short streets away and she is planning on leaving her DS (10 months) in his cot when it's nap time and taking the monitor with her.

I gently said that I didn't think this a good idea for a variety of reasons....which I don't want to point out here as everyone is aware of them I am sure.

I suggested various alternatives...she was dismissive.

AIBU to think this is not the right thing to do? And AIBU to be worried about the baby?

OP posts:
MammaTJ · 24/12/2013 00:17

I don't think the baby monitor will reach that far, tbh.

So many bad scenarios spring to mind though.

LindyHemming · 24/12/2013 00:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Cuddleswithcats · 24/12/2013 00:18

Please tell me that this is a jokeHmm

lilyaldrin · 24/12/2013 00:18

Maybe be blunt with her and tell her that if anyone at the restaurant realises she's left her baby alone they will call social services.

theeternalstudent · 24/12/2013 00:19

Not good and illegal.

Why not give NSPCC a call and have a chat with them about it. They will be able to give you advice on what to do.

Hopefully she will change her mind and not leave her baby. Sad.

Poshnosh · 24/12/2013 00:20

I'd phone the police when you know she has left. What the actual fuck is she thinking?

AuntySib · 24/12/2013 00:20

Just wrong. Offer to babysit if you can: if she refuses, and won't make proper arrangements, I'd be calling the police.

Mintyy · 24/12/2013 00:20

I can't imagine there will be many at her big family Christmas who will be happy with that scenario either. Tell her very firmly that she should absolutely NOT do this. Surely she realises? Or is she not terribly bright?

Original poster
AwfulMaureen · 24/12/2013 00:21

She seems to brush my worries aside like I',m silly. I'm not am I? She says the monitor does reach...and that if he coughs or stirs then she will immediately go there. I was kind of hoping to dissuade her...and the thought of calling anyone about this is awful....but how would I feel if something DID happen?

I wonder if her relatives will think it's ok.

OP posts:
YoureBeingASillyBilly · 24/12/2013 00:21

If this was my friend (i'd be wondering how i hadnt realised she was so thick before now) i would tell her i'd e ringing SS if she did that and i would follow through. It seriously is not on.

trashcanjunkie · 24/12/2013 00:22

you are completely right op. Your friend is not thinking straight.

Original poster
AwfulMaureen · 24/12/2013 00:22

Minty she is VERY bright. She's a paramedic...and very intelligent.

OP posts:
Moxiegirl · 24/12/2013 00:22

I assume this is daytime, why does she not just get him to sleep in a pushchair and take him?

ExBrightonBauble · 24/12/2013 00:22

You could show her the law about this (here from the GOV website), and then tell her that if she does this you would have to call the police or social services. I don't know how else you could persuade her not to do it. If it's in the daytime, could she not just take the baby with her?

FreudiansSlipper · 24/12/2013 00:23

i think your friend is winding you up

really everyone in her family would think this is acceptable of course not

wellieboots · 24/12/2013 00:23

I hope that her family wouldn't let her do this! please offer to babysit if you can, tell her monitors don't work so far away, oh god this is really scary!

Original poster
AwfulMaureen · 24/12/2013 00:24

Thinking back, when I suggested she perhaps let the baby just struggle through a bit...she got angry and said "He NEEDS his nap!" in a snappy voice. This must be because she knows it's wrong but does not want reminding of this.

OP posts:
JeanSeberg · 24/12/2013 00:24

Must be more to this...

Original poster
AwfulMaureen · 24/12/2013 00:25

Slipper I assure you she's not winding me up. Who on earth would wind someone up about this? She's not told anyone in her family I assume...except her fiancee who just does what she says. They live too far for me to babysit.

OP posts:
yummumto3girls · 24/12/2013 00:25

Agree its a bit of a friendship deal breaker!!
You say you don't want to go through the reasons because they are obvious but obviously not for her!! Really gobsmacked by this, thought you were going to say next door not two streets away!!

Original poster
AwfulMaureen · 24/12/2013 00:25

jean what do you mean? More to what? My post?

OP posts:
YoureBeingASillyBilly · 24/12/2013 00:26

Why doenst she get a babysitter i e needs a nap?

BrianTheMole · 24/12/2013 00:26

Its a fucking stupid idea. What is she thinking??

CookieDoughKid · 24/12/2013 00:26

Is she out of her mind? Too streets away? What I'd something happened to the baby? You would never live with it and nor would she.

It's not worth the risk AT ALL.

Show her this thread. And yes, I would absolutely report her if it was my friend. Friend or not.

MyNameIsWinkly · 24/12/2013 00:27

She's an utter fucking idiot if she really intends to do this. If, as a police officer, I went to a house and found a baby that age home alone, I can guarantee you that baby would be taken into protection immediately and she would be facing prosecution. She would then lose her job and would face intrusive supervision from SS for some time.

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