to not want to lie about the fact that DP shagged a prostitute?

[ThisIsNotMyLife]

I've thrown him out. He still denies it though.

People are asking me why I threw him out. Obviously DP would like me to keep to stum. Should I keep it to myself for the sake of a quiet life? I haven't told anyone yet.

How did you find our about it?

Are you 100%?

If you are 100% sure you wont get back with him, then tell people what you like. But to be honest, I would just tell them it is none of their business.

People are nasty and bitchy and will gossip behind your back. It could easily affect you, so probably best to say nothing.

I don't mean that in a horrid way, just do you actually know for sure?

I would tell anyone who asked

Why lie for him ?

He lent me his laptop and left his email account open. The rest writes itself really.

Don't say a word. It could come back to bite you on the backside.

Depends...how old, if you have them, are the dcs? That kind of thing, if it becomes widely known, can be a tough to deal with @ school.

why would it affect her, squeaky ?

the people who would judge her by the fact that her husband is a lowlife are not worth knowing anyway

If you want to tell people he's been given the boot for cheating, fair enough. Doesn't matter whether it was with a prostitute or not.

Are you absolutely sure though?

Ahh right. TBH, if it were me, I'd tell close family as support, so they know what you're going through. But not too many for people for reasons Squeaky said.

I would tell them, or at least family and close friends. It will help you to avoid the trap of sweeping it under the carpet and taking him back.

If you don't want people to know about things, don't do them. Simple.

However it''s up to you, depends whether you want people to find it sensational and gossip about it, as the price for getting some sympathetic righteous indignation.

I am failing to understand how it could bite her on the backside

Or perhaps this would be such an utter dealbreaker for me there would be less than zero percent of working it out,...so I would honestly throw him to the fucking wolves

FooFoo has a point about DC getting a hard time about this if you have any and it becomes common knowledge.

That came out less sympathetic and more snippy than I intended, wasn't meant to honest! :o

If you have a friend or family member you really trust then tell them. For everyone else I would keep it quiet until your anger dies down and you can think calmly about what you really want people to know about your business.

It will affect her, if she has children and if remarks about their dad's sexual habits get passed on to them (which they almost certainly will be if it becomes widely known).

If no children involved then I certainly wouldn't lie.

I also wouldn't want other people talking (i.e. acquaintances).

But I'd want close family and friends to know, so they can help in the most appropriate way and give you the right support.

I wouldn't tell people especially if you have dcs together.

Well I'd maybe tell my sister but that would be it.

I would tell people if I felt like it. You owe him nothing.

Shagging a prostitute is way scummier than cheating with a willing woman.

No kids, I'm a refugee from TTC camp.

YANBU. wouldn't go round announcing it randomly, but I would tell those people who asked. How horrible for you .

OP is asking "should she lie" ?

not "should she broadcast it" ?

I would not broadcast it, but neither would I cover up for him with evasions

how would you lie thisisnotmylife? or would you just say you'd rather not talk about it? or are you thinking of another reason?