to not want to lie about the fact that DP shagged a prostitute?

[ThisIsNotMyLife]

I've thrown him out. He still denies it though.

People are asking me why I threw him out. Obviously DP would like me to keep to stum. Should I keep it to myself for the sake of a quiet life? I haven't told anyone yet.

My first inclination would have been to punch him. Has he put you at risk here? STD's etc?

If people want to know why you have kicked him out, suggest they ask him. He's unlikely to tell them but it means you don't have to lie or justify yourself.

she has no children

there is no playground gossip to be had

this is about 2 people

one of them has acted despicably

he should not be protected from the consequences of his actions by a woman

to do so, buys in to the Stepford mindset that you must always please your man or he will go off and fuck someone more pliable

really...do people not get this ?

covering up for twatty men is sooooooo the wrong thing to do

Ooh, isn't that a little mean to MIL cece

• I think she'd be way down on my list !

(Actually my MIL passed away a few years ago. But I don't like the idea of upsetting mothers ! )

Thisisnotmylife I am loving the fact that you are the one speaking most sense on your own thread

I think whilst I wouldn't broadcast it to all and sundry I would quietly mention it to some mutual friends, saying that you understand that there will always speculation in a circle of friends about why a couple has split and you just want to avoid any awkward confusion later on.

Anyone decent will see that he was in the wrong (assuming he is guilty of it) and if there are any social events where it would be awkward for you to both attend then, as the innocent party, I would expect that he should have to stay away rather than you.

No AF it's nothing to do with Stepford wives.
If there are no children involved though I would be much more likely to tell everyone he knows. But it's your call.

oh :(

He's lost his DP...isn't that enough? Is he to be tarred and feathered too? Paraded around with a sign saying 'I made a mistake, I deserve to be villified for all eternity'. Jesus, ivory towers or what.

siamo just report me if you can't stand my behaviour, really

it's what the report button is for

am not sure why you felt you had to inform me of your concerns about my current, and past, attitude right here on this thread

and fwiw the comment "antagonistic twat" is far more deserving of the report button, but perhaps you didn't notice that

Why do these threads always end up with bitchy arguments rather than providing the support that the OP wants?

I'd have stuck the feathers up his arse and the tar down his throat if I'd had the opportunity.

AF I said the same as squeaky and you seem to have ignored others who have too.
If you don't want news passed around, don't announce it on FB or to every T,D,H.
Trusted friends/ family are exactly that- trusted. They shouldn't gossip.

I think OP is getting plenty of support here

OP, I wish we had a set of cheerleader smilies for your last post!

siamo why would you hijack someone else's thread to do so ?

did you see an opening because squeaky started it first ?

'Why do these threads always end up with bitchy arguments rather than providing the support that the OP wants'

Because we are individuals with individual opinions.

Well it's an interesting squabble anyway. Nice to know people care about this subject, I thought I was imaging my worries.

OP,
I am very sorry this has happened to you - especially whist you were TTC. You owe this man nothing. There are no children's feelings to consider. If I were you I would absolutely be telling mutual friends exactly what he has done - fuck knows what bullshit he will be telling them instead.
You have nothing to be ashamed of, you have nothing to cover up. Why shouldn't you tell the truth?
Good luck

:o @ OP "Well it's an interesting squabble anyway."!!

I hope things work out for you.

I care very much that women do not cover up for fucking stupid men

What were your worries OP?
Were you bothered by the thought friends would think you were at fault if you didn't give a reason? Your real friends will believe you acted correctly even if they don't know exactly what went wrong.
You get to choose what to say, your OH will be making things up as he goes in order to get sympathy.