Would your DH/P think that these are acceptable things to say to you, or do I have permission to clock mine over the head with something heavy?

[DooinMeCleanin]

We were looking for holiday clothes for me. Why any input from him is required I have no idea, he seems to think he has a right to tell me how to dress, but that is a whole other thread.

During looking for swimming costumes:

1. "No, I don't like that one, all your belly fat will hang out all over the place. You know how paranoid you are about your belly fat"

He sounds a right charmer!!! I am sure he looks like Adonis

You wanna tell him you can always lose weight if YOU want to, he however, will always be a twat!

Have you knocked him out yet? What a wanker

Does he have any redeeming qualities? I know you're having a bit of a laugh about it all but reading it made me feel very for you.

Tell him hes a fat bastard and you're going to trade him in for a hot toyboy.

Next time tell him there's a difference between being honest and a twat

I don't know if him being surprised he'd upset you makes it better or worse.

You seem lighthearted in the way you post about it, but it must sting, especially if he's this twatish about other things.

Leave the bastard!

Id have to or I would be done for murder!

'Does he have any redeeming qualities?' - does his credit rating count?

No, he is good Dad and he does let me get away with murder. He's quite funny too. He is just a bit clueless when it comes to talking to women I think. Either that or he is an abusive arsehole who wants to make sure I know my place is with him because no-one else will have me. I'm get to decide, which.

The fact you are even asking indicates to me that he has ground away at your self esteem already. You are questioning whether it's OK for someone, actually not someone, but the person who is meant to love you most in the world, to repeatedly make disparaging comments about your weight. One little poke about tummy weight might be cheeky for a couple who are comfortable with that, but again and again?!

I am a man.

He sounds like an absolute royal bellend.

Dooin - you know he is being a bastard. You know he does it to belittle you. And since I have seen your post on that overweight thread, you Know that he is partly the cause of your weight issues - so I am glad you told him where to shove the crosstrainer - I'd be tempted to hit him over the head wit hit and then get rid of him because he is destroying your self-esteem, to what end, only you can know but it does rather sound as though he's trying to ensure that you stay with him because you feel you have no choice.

Go and re-read your post on the overweight thread if you need to - you KNOW this is all him and not you. Only you can decided how much more of his shit you need to put up with.
:(

I would be hurt, upset and horrified if my DP said those things to me :( really I would

I assume he looks like Brad fucking Pitt

What a nobber! I'm always quite shocked when I read threads like these, I just can't believe that people who supposedly love their partners would speak to them this way.

I'm even more shocked that LeQueen made a spelling error in her post, is she drunk?

Oh yeah, that man needs a smack. Not over the head thou, I'm mean I'd aim lower

Insensitive maybe but does he have a point? Will you be forever moaning about your weight dependent on what you buy? Sounds like he has his own issues about weight that he's projecting too.

It's the thin end of the wedge, isn't it?

I second MIFLAW.

Apologies for insane lack of drawing breath proper punctuation in that first paragraph!

lol at icelolly alot

what an idiot. yes start also getting pics of made models in their swimmers and tell him he better get on the cross trainer while you look whistfully at pics of the made models!!

No he would never say such things to me, they're not 'supportive' or 'helpful' at all, very insensitive and nasty in fact. Why is he so fixated on your weight, it seems a bit odd that he keeps going on about it, especially if he's not exactly skinny himself?

BTW...I recently told my DH that he was too old and too fat for a brand of trainers/casual shoes. I think I said he could either be his age but slim or younger and fat, but NOT old and overweight as he'd look stupid wearing super trendy shoes.

This isn't even funny to be honest, he sounds like a complete shit. I hope to god your kids didn't hear him saying that stuff to you either! You poor thing.

Crapola I am the same size as I was when we went away last year and the only time my weight was an issue then is when he was making comments such as "Are those shorts baggy around your tummy or is that all your fat?"

Shopping for swimwear is a bone of contention for him because I need support for my, er, better features , and they don't come cheap in my bra size.

Buy him a mankini and "forget" to pack his trunks

No, my husband wouldn´t think that those were acceptable things to say.

I recently wanted an opinion about swimming costumes & he just told me which he thought looked better from the two that I liked.

What sort of "getting away with murder" does he let you do? Only if I had a husband or partner who thought it appropriate to speak to me like that then I rather suspect that's exactly what I would be committing.

If i had big bazoomas, i'd consider wearing a bra under my swimsuit.
would that help at all?
(not got a clue, cos mine are like bloody wasp stings )

but in answer to your P's attitude.
he's a twat and a wanker.
No wonder you worry so much about your weight.
A heavy weight on his head, and at his balls, then sit him down and tell him to stop treating you like shit.