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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not understand why party bags are the done thing......

205 replies

mistletoekisses · 07/08/2010 08:13

So DS1 turns 3 in just over a month. At his request, we are having his nursery friends invited to this one, having just done close family until now.

Before actually hosting a party, I have always been firmly against the whole party bag concept - when I was a child, you got a piece of cake and a balloon and off you went. Am planning to do the same for DS party.

AIBU? Is the party bag thing so mainstream now that it will look realy odd not to do it?

OP posts:
ChasingSquirrels · 07/08/2010 08:17

it IS very mainstream.
Do you care if you look "odd"?
I didn't, I don't do party bags.

BarbieLovesKen · 07/08/2010 08:25

Yeah, sorry, I think you are being unreasonable.

I never get it when people are "against" things like party bags. It doesnt make much sense to me.

Stop being so miserable and chuck a lollipop or two into a bag. Its just silly.

herjazz · 07/08/2010 08:27

You could always just stick a piece of cake in a cheapo party bag and tie it with a balloon! Kwym. They are a norse to make and receive. My nearly 3 yo is quite obsessed with them tho. There have been some good ideas on here about doing better stuff with them, putting seeds to plant in them, doing a lucky dip instead..

Must admit I've found the changes in kiddies party etiquette quite a surprise too. Oh the tears as I never realised you got a prize every te with pass the parcel and had 'turns' in winning! Now that IS something I sack off now

StealthPolarBear · 07/08/2010 08:32

agree with BLK, never realised why things like party bags that children love so much could be so offensive to adults. Yes, we hate them but we're not the recipients.

spanxaremyonlyfriend · 07/08/2010 08:34

Why are you against them? Will it hurt to put the balloon and cake in a bag?

autodidact · 07/08/2010 08:38

Love party bags and am always surprised when people say they are a new concept. I am no spring chicken and there were always party bags when I was little too.

Lizcat · 07/08/2010 08:42

I let them win prizes in the games and then put each child's prizes in the bag with a piece of cake. Examples something in each layer of pass the parcel, disco dancing prizes etc.
My personal bug bear is the shear quantity of sweets in some party bags, my child will have eaten nearly her own body weight in sugary, high fat snacks at the party she doesn't need any more when she gets home.

TheLadyEvenstar · 07/08/2010 08:48

I used to do party bags for DS1 when he was at primary school. I miss doing it as DS2 has not got to that age yet!

I used to put
cake
crisps
hair bobbles/car/toy soldier
fruit bar
banana/apple
a lollipop
and a toy from toysrus party range.

I can't wait for DS2 to start school so I can do it all over again...

firsttimemum77 · 07/08/2010 08:49

My dd turned 3 last week and I did party bags for the preschool children, because age always comes home with a party bag and I wanted to reciprocate. It was a pain because it just took up so much of my time, which I could have done without. Nevertheless I did it A
and had 26 happy kids.

I put in a lolipop, box of raisins, activity book, mini pencil set, bouncing ball and a balloon - job done! I hate receiving party bags with nothing but sweets in them.

But yanbu - it's a silly concept in my opinion!

firsttimemum77 · 07/08/2010 08:51

Age should be she (blame the iPhone)

Sibble · 07/08/2010 08:55

yanbu - I dislike the concept too. However I do what others have said, play games with the prizes going in the party bag along with a balloon and cake. DS2 had his 6th birthday today (time difference as in NZ) what they managed to scoop up from the pinata went in their party bags, sweets, rubbers, balloons, pencil sharpeners etc..............

tittybangbang · 07/08/2010 08:56

I hate party bags. Bloody waste of money and the earth's precious resources, because most of their contents (if not edible) will end up in the bin within 24 hours or cluttering up someone's house in an annoying way for months until they're chucked out.

Sorry firsttimmum, but the pencils in party bags end up getting chucked because they're usually too small to colour comfortably with. The activity books are similarly crap. It's like McDonalds toys - played with for 5 minutes then abandoned.

Balloons on the other hand are FAB. You can have a lot of fun with a balloon, they cost very little and they are small to throw away when they've been popped.

Olifin · 07/08/2010 08:58

I agree Lizcat- ridiculous amounts of sweets and a load of tiny plastic things which will be dismantled in the car on the way home.

I do cake + balloon and no-one's complained yet :)

PadmeHum · 07/08/2010 09:04

Another loather.

I can't bear party bags - the kids have enough at the party, without having to stuff their faces in the car on the way home with the contents of the partybarfbag.

If I can, I politely refuse them (on the grounds of DS2's health). If not all of the lollies/chocs are binned before we get home.

A piece of cake and a balloon are more than sufficient.

pooka · 07/08/2010 09:07

Is very mainstream. I do them, or at least have for dd's last couple of parties.

But I try to make sure that the contents are not things that would irritate me.

DD is 7. For her 7th party she had a cookery thing, and I put a cookie cutter in each bag.

For her 6th, she had mini flower presses.

LynetteScavo · 07/08/2010 09:10

Just cake and balloon is fine.

We've collected so much plastic tat over the years (like yo-yo's that don't actually work), either put in something decent, or don't bother.

Having said that,i n DD's 5th party bags I put cake I mini bar of chocolate, 1 bouncy ball and some bubbles. I figured any more and I was just wasting my money.

pooka · 07/08/2010 09:13

And I appreciate a bag because it means I don't end up with cake smeared all over the inside of the car.

So, bag. Check.
Cake. Check.
Very small toy/present. Check.
Sweets. Yes usually. Don't mind sweets in general. They are treats, so not all the time. A party is a special occasion, and I don't see the problem with putting a small sugary item or two in a party bag. If you don't like them, then bin away to your heart's content. Just like the sweets-into-school-on-birthday thing.

Jetbaby · 07/08/2010 09:23

When DD1 had her 3rd birthday party, I was actually asked by a couple of children if it was time for their party bag yet......

Having said that, she has been to loads of parties this year (first year at school) and the party bags have ranged from expensive / quite full to not much in & one at easter when she got a balloon (already blown up & attached to a stick thingy so it looks "bigger") and a chocolate egg - she didn't care - she loved them all.

Isawthreeships · 07/08/2010 09:26

I remember being the only child without party bags when I grew up, because my mum didn't see the need - those sorts of memories stick, however silly they are to us adults.

FWIW, I too hate plastic tat. Love the idea of cookie cutters. Cheap seeds are fun IME - mustard or cress will grow even in winter.

sanielle · 07/08/2010 09:28

I thought the point of bags was so that the children who just watched their friend enjoy an orgy of gifts didn't feel left out and go home empty handed? I always had party bags as a child and always received them at other parties too,

flipflopsattheready · 07/08/2010 09:29

YANBU.

Instead of a party bag for DD1's birthday this year I gave each child who came a helium balloon (already blown up, obviously!) - you can get them pretty cheaply from the market here, they last for ages and three year olds love them.

I hate party bags!

LostArt · 07/08/2010 09:41

I have been to a couple of parties were bags weren't offered. To say it didn't go down well with some little sweethearts is an understatement. If you don't mind being known as the mean party host, then go ahead, on your head be it Grin.

PS YANBU. It seems odd to spend time and money searching for plastic tat that the child won't play with for more than two minutes.

pooka · 07/08/2010 10:15

I do think though that for 3 year olds party bags may be OTT. THink they're more for school age kids - probably because that's when the children become seriously aware of mainstream.

eidsvold · 07/08/2010 10:25

I love doing party bags - dd1 was 8 recently and they had noodle boxes with their name on - mini pen, notebook, one sweetie, key ring and stickers and they got to take home the plate or mug they had painted. All girls and they loved the mini pens esp.

I am a fan of party bags BUT do not fill them with sweets as we have had in the past. I have given thems ome craft to do - like design a door hanger which has gone into the bag with a little book or things like that. I am forever looking for cool things to put in the bags.

lady007pink · 07/08/2010 10:27

I don't put much more than a cake and a balloon into the party bag. Maybe a few penny sweets and cheap tat you get in the pound shop - kids love it!