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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not understand why party bags are the done thing......

205 replies

mistletoekisses · 07/08/2010 08:13

So DS1 turns 3 in just over a month. At his request, we are having his nursery friends invited to this one, having just done close family until now.

Before actually hosting a party, I have always been firmly against the whole party bag concept - when I was a child, you got a piece of cake and a balloon and off you went. Am planning to do the same for DS party.

AIBU? Is the party bag thing so mainstream now that it will look realy odd not to do it?

OP posts:
petelly · 09/08/2010 20:37

At our parties we do a pinata. We give empty bags to all the kids and then they fill them up with all the goodies that come out of the pinata. It's great fun and saves having to actually make up the party bags.

I also don't like the cake in the bag business. We'd been living in the US before we came back to the UK a couple of years ago so hadn't had any birthday parties for the dds here. I'd completely forgotten the childhood memories of squashed cake in a bag until dd1 attended a birthday party here!!

mumblecrumble · 09/08/2010 20:50

I love party bags.

Is a lively end to a special occaision - best idea I've seen was some home made play-dough wrapped in cellophane and a couple of cookie cutters. We played with it for ages!!!

DD's 3rd birthday party soon and I am enjoying trying to make what could be tacky into something fun and money and resource draining..... (hmmmmm... tis our first party so am thinking the novelty will wear over the years...]

I wont be putting cake in - it melts and is minging. We will eat it at the party...

Ordered some nice blue scrunchy recycled paper bags of ebay for £2 for 20. Like the above ideas!

CDMforever · 09/08/2010 20:54

I'm not kill-joy but party bags really are rubbish. I have a DS of 12 and one of 3 and I can honestly say they have never received and I have never provided anything that has been halfway decent. Agree with the poster about the abundance of sweets too.
Its DS2's 3rd birthday soon and I'm breaking with the tradition of party bags and have ordered a few sets of books with DVDs or CDs from the Book People and each child will get one wrapped up plus a piece of cake. They are gorgeous presents and so much better than assorted pieces of plastic and such like. They will love their presents and I will feel extremely worthy and not quite as poor.

SpanishHarlot · 09/08/2010 21:15

I agree that they are a pain but when on the odd occasion someone doesn't give out bags the kids just cannot understand it and what's more they say so very loudly which can be very embarrasing.

I buy the 60c bags already made up and tied with a balloon but it certainly adds to the overall cost.

mummy2theboys · 09/08/2010 21:27

When I pick my kids up from parties I have to rifle through party bag to get rid of the crap that would put a 0-3 (not recommended ) section to shame. I have never followed the herd, the kids always leave with something from my kids parties but it ain't a bag full of shit.

yikesascorpiobaby · 10/08/2010 15:38

Well I am now rather less excited about the party bags for this weekend's party!
Glad to know that all the thought and cash will go on making other mums make a cat's bum face, and that half of what we bought may end up in the bin or confiscated!
I agree with the poster who said party bags are just mums trying to do their best for their kids- wish everyone else would see that too! Party poopers Sad

Tunes · 10/08/2010 15:49

My kids love party packs. Try filling them with other things besides sweets.

www.itsminelabels.biz have great temporary tattoos and party pack stickers and they will do them up in a theme or have some designs to choose from. You can also put a sweet message on them.

Kids love tattoos and its a lot cheaper than filling them up with sweets.

PlanetEarth · 10/08/2010 15:50

Crayons, please no more crayons! Our kids will have to be colouring in till they're 90 to use up all the crayons!

flyingboat · 10/08/2010 16:16

Planetearth, your last comment made me smile - have along with DD2 and DD3 spent best part of day recycling a mountain of multicoloured broken crayons (mostly from party bags) into strpiey candles - what fun!

mamaGool · 10/08/2010 16:50

eidsvold - i want to come to one of your parties! Wink

PlanetEarth · 10/08/2010 18:53

Stripey candles, never tried that Smile.

rusmum · 10/08/2010 19:01

HATE party bags- cost a bomb for 30 kids and all we do to stuff in ours when we get home (cake incl) is bin it! what a waste...

SarfEasticated · 10/08/2010 20:33

It's my DD's 3 rd birthday soon - 12 friends invited - so they are getting some gifts from the traidaid website, a chocolate ladybird and a balloon, If I have nerves of steel the time we may make some biscuits and DD can ice friends initial on them. I think party bags are a nice thing to give, but would prefer one nice handmade cake and some bubbles to lots of plastic bits and chocolate.

muminthemiddle · 11/08/2010 09:24

I always did party bags. Just put sweets and cake in them.
Tbh if my dcs ever came home without cake I found this very odd, why get all the children to sing to your dc around a big showing off cake and then not give each guest a piece-wierd.

On a side note op parties have changed over the years.
My parties were always the same-pretty crap tbh, I personally want my dcs to enjoy their parties, without having to spend a fortune on them iykwim.

Indaba · 11/08/2010 10:40

kids have got used to going home with something....but it doesn't matter what!......

just a suggestion, but you can buy a really, really cheap tattoo and a sticker and two wrapped chewy sweets which in total would cost no more than 5 pence.....wrap in a nice serviette with a bit of ribbon.....they'll be happy

and if they are not how about a sharp clip round the ear and a prompt to have more manners next time Wink

ramade · 11/08/2010 11:20

Come on parents revolt against the party bags (more than a piece of cake and a balloon).

Anything else is giving them yet another lesson about materialistic.

They have had a great time at a party, screaming, running around, cake. Surely that's enough.

ramade · 11/08/2010 11:25

PlanetEarth Ha ha try this:

www.instructables.com/id/ReUse-ReMake-Crayons/

Mrsshakespeare · 11/08/2010 14:55

I totally agree with you Ramade and have totally revolted!!!

pointydog · 11/08/2010 15:04

Never mind party bags, it's parties for 30 children with others providing the entertainment that's the real waste of money surely?

BAck in my day you had a couple of friends round for tea and that was more than enough.

mamaGool · 11/08/2010 16:58

CheerfulYank & gwenner - I agree with you about theming the bags to the party - some really lovely ideas there.

ramade - what a fantastic website!

It seems that the more creative mums are party bag fans because it gets the creative juices flowing and because these mums are able to hand make the bags / some of the gifts (or at least think beyond plastic tat), it also saves money and in some cases makes for a better party as the gift/bag construction becomes an activity that the kids enjoy - everyone wins!

I have made themed party bags for adult parties (hen dos in particular) and they always go down a storm too. We're all big kids at heart and I don't think it's the fact that you get a present (the contents don't have to be expensive - as evidenced here) but that as a guest you've been thought about, so you feel special and how lovely to get a surprise treat just when you thought the party was over!

mumblecrumble · 14/08/2010 14:12

Just been to 3rd buirthday party and DD and I have enjoyed looking in her party pbag putting sweets in the treats jar for later and playing with the little toys. Its the lookng inside that is the fun!!

DD's birthday party next week.... will be giving out bags but not with cake it. Ours from today went in the bin as i has stuck to the serviete

OhCobblers · 14/08/2010 14:50

i think they're fun and don't have to be full of crap - i've always loved looking for bits to go in,
BUT i don't put in plastic rubbish!!

i find one really nice little toy for each child (Sainsburys do a nice little metal car in a box for 60p) and then add chocs, mini biscuits, bubbles, etc, but generally not sweets!!

AfricanExport · 14/08/2010 15:02

I love party bags and so do the kids. I disagree that they get loads of stuff at parties, generally they get very little junk or sweets at the parties I go to. It's normally a sandwich, a juice, 1 little bag of crips and/or mini chocolate and a yoghurt in a box.

My party bags are fun though - I use reusable cotton bags which I find cheap online. I put an iron-on design on them and always have a theme. My daughter had Sweet Making and we had recipe cards, mini chocolate moulds, a bowl, a spoon and an apron. The kids loved them and they will be used. I NEVER add plastic tat or things that make a noise!!!

Marney · 14/08/2010 21:15

Always did party bags wanted my daughter to have friends be invited to other parties and children to enjoy being children

aloiseb · 15/08/2010 08:45

My ds went to one party (for 4 year olds) at a ball pit, where the food which the Mum had bought consisted of:

  1. a vat of crisps
  2. another vat of chocolate fingers

Now I know that a lot of kids won't eat anything else at the party anyway, but surely that is giving up?

BTW I can't remember what the party bat was but I bet it was pretty c~~p. Smile