1 day sober

[TooManyPlatesInMotion]

I didn't have a drink last night for the first time in months. I have a problem, and I really want to make some changes.

I'm 43 and I suppose alcohol has been an issue on and off since my early 20s, with periods of sobriety for the duration of three pregnancies. Otherwise, i have managed the odd week off here and there but it always escalates again.

I am overweight, unfit and feel dreadful, constantly tired and anxious. Drinking, on average two thirds of a bottle of wine or cava a night, much more over Xmas. I just can't do it any more. My kids need me to be better than this.

I'm looking into both Smart Recovery and AA.

Can anyone recommend some good podcasts that might help?

Thank you.

Hello everyone, good we all just keeping on, keeping on. I drank a bottle of wine on Friday and again on Sunday, and to be honest, I'm glad I did as I didn't really enjoy it, so now feel I more in control of my deciosn to really cut back and who know, I may even stop completely.

I'm also waiting for a delivery of some faboulous cordials, which I've had before, so that will be a little treat later for my fizzy water.

This one is my absolute favourite
shop.mrfitzpatricks.com/products/rhubarb-rosehip

aswellascanbeexpected that is great that you now know you have a choice and feel
better without. That is where I am
aiming to be- someone did share with me a 9.5% Sauvignon blanc at 300 calories and leaves no hangover and meant to be lovely but I will leave that for now

It all feels rather odd at the moment. Not bothered during the week now although I do get a pang after a shitty day for a large glass of dry white wine. but overall ok. How are you all

@rogueone yes, the same. The odd pang during the week for something very cold and dry. Weekends still feel a bit tricky.

I am not thinking about February, just going to see how I feel. The rational part of my brain does know that a major reset requires nore than one month!

So looking forward to the massage I have booked for tomorrow.

How about everyone else?

TooManyPlatesInMotion weekends are still tough especially Sunday. Habits are hard to change, I do feel good and getting better sleep. I am now just starting to think about what to do going forward. I have a night out on the 4th Feb but I am actually thinking of driving and coming home and not staying the night. Although if reframing is what i am aiming for I suppose it could be a chance to see what happens if I drink and whether I can truly be the person who only drinks on social occassions. We will see

Hope everyone is doing ok this weekend 💪🏻

Thanks @onelife22 . How are ylu doing?

I felt bloody desperate for a wine by the time I got to this evening, but cooked something a bit different whuch distracted me and it went.

Pondering Feb. I have some drinks with school parents on 2nd and might attempt it alcohol free.

Hi everyone.
ive been quiet but been coming back here daily.
im struggling. Not in the day to day. I’ve accepted I’m not drinking in January and the daily battle isn’t there anymore. I know it isn’t happening.
I seem to be finding life relatively stressful and whilst alcohol had some negative things to it, it also did loosen me up, and made me relax and laugh. I feel bad talking about the ‘positives’ and things I miss here though.
i set myself the target of dry January. And i can’t work out what I see and want to happen going forward. I don’t want to go back. I don’t want to never drink again. I want to have no set plans and just go with the flow but I know the flow only ever goes in one direction. So, I know I need to be intentional. But I’m unsure how.

how are others doing?

@TooManyPlatesInMotion I'm good thanks. I had a very weird dream last night that I bought myself a really expensive bottle of wine on 1st Feb and in the time it took me to get home I decided to put it in the wine rack rather than the fridge. I was really upset with myself in the dream.

I've decided to go for dry Feb. We have our weekend away next weekend and I have done the food shop and didn't order any alcohol.

Hopefully DH will join me.

March is feeling it could be more of a challenge but I'm confident for Feb.

@Lightsbonaza I completely understand and I'm in the same place. For me DJ ends on Friday, whilst the daily desire has dropped I know I still want to drink. I still have to decide I'm not drinking rather than just not drinking if that makes any sense.

I don't want to return to the amount I was drinking, I do want to drink, I'm not sure I can do both.

Well I broke my 25 day alcohol free run last night for a birthday dinner. I had three glasses at the restaurant. I was fine today and apart from the usual little pang in the afternoon I stuck to sparkling water. I was fearful incase I went straight back to it. So feeling like this has been a big step towards in reframing my drinking. I want to not drink in the house at all unless it’s a social gathering. So not cracking open the wine today has been a huge success for me and I am on the right direction. Hope your all having a good weekend

@Lightsbonaza I feel a bit like you. I can't see myself never drinking again but equally I want to keep this up as long as I can.

I had my first Sunday lunch out this month today and the first without wine. I didn't really enjoy the food which was a shame as I'd been really looking forward to trying where we went.

It was much easier to deal with fidgety children without a drink though!!

I've decided in definitely not drinking for our weekend away next weekend.

@Lightsbonaza and @onelife22 yes, I feel similar. I don't want to say I will never drink again, but equally I need to keep going with this a while longer to have a decent attempt at changing my relationship with booze. In a way Jan was straightforward because I just accepted it. Feb is going to be harder, but I do want to try to keep going.

@rogueone well done! That sounds like real progress.

Dry Jan ✅ now to tackle Feb 💪🏻

onelife22 well done!!

well done everyone. The end of the month is nigh.
Dry Jan done for me (well; broken twice for special occasions and amounts I was happy with).
as I said before I needed a clear physical marker to demonstrate the change so have been on a healthy eating kick too. So am 5kg lighter with another 5kg or so, to go. Zzzz

i feel like I’m getting used to not being hungover. The idea of feeling crap every morning seems like an insane thing to do to myself given I already am struggling with just managing work; kids etc. I won’t go back to how it was.

how are others feeling?

Lightsbonaza I feel great. I really struggled at the start although I stopped on the 3rd and broke the streak once. I focussed on fitness and diet and have lost half a stone so far. I don’t have any pangs during the week at all and love feeling bright and I have noticed a difference in my work ( which I didn’t think had been affected but clearly was) I have had to face my new reality too and feel bad for my kids having a sick dad and a mum chucking wine down her throat . So my home is a happier place. I am glad I have reframed my drinking and can’t quite believe I have managed although recognise how easy it is to fall into the daily drinking again. I am staying on this thread as it has really helped me.

@Lightsbonaza @rogueone great to hear that you're still feeling the benefits

I am feeling the same, happier in general, happier at home, more focus on health and fitness and at work.

I thought by the end of Jan I would be reaching for the wine in the wine rack or looking forward to this weekend away and drinking but I have enjoyed how I feel so much.

Also completely agree with the point about struggling with juggling life anyway let alone without a hangover and guilt I have drank again in the mix!

@Lightsbonaza @rogueone I'm also going to be staying on this thread.

I really like not having hangovers. That said, January has been challenging enough without them, so I am not sure why I would give myself the added stress and anxiety of waking up feeling like crap.

My skin looks better, I love the financial savings I have made, and a generally feel more in control. Going to try and keep it up for Feb.

Jan has just been about not drinking for me - that has been the priority. In Feb I want to carry on but also devote some time and attention to eating better and shifting some weight.

It’s great to hear how everyone is getting on.
I think this is like exercise/going to the gym. As much as you delay going or dread it no one regrets it after..

Hey everyone. My radical moderation has not been very radical this last week and possibly could be described as moderation at all- had v drinky friends to stay. Back on it this week. Aiming for 12 days of no drinking at all prior to a ski trip. Third day today.

I feel like moderation and teetotalism both have their psychological challenges.

Hi. Well where to start......
I have a problem with drink! Drinking up to 4 bottles of wine at a time maybe 4 times a week. I have drank more tbh but generally it's between 2- 4. I have a partner and a beautiful 7 year old boy who just doesn't deserve this. Today it has to change and I'm hoping using this forum will help. I've lied, covered up and spent hundreds of £££s. Has anyone got any tips to achieve what seems like a mammoth task? xx

@Scoley76 take it one day at a time. You'll feel worse before you feel better so stick with it. I'm a month in now and feel amazing.

Scoley76 I was similar. I drunk every night, would get anxious if I only had one bottle and a half in the house and would go out and get more. I would hide empties and pour wine into a cup when sitting with my DH has he always had an issue with my drinking. I started becoming angry too and my kids started copying their dad. For me I set a date to stop- I then planned what I would do instead. Signed up to a online fitness course, stocked up on fizzy water and planned dog walks and workouts when I would usually be opening the wine- went to bed early too and focussed on making nice meals. I was aiming to reframe my drinking not stop and the main thing was to stop drinking at home . But I did realise I needed to stop for a while before having a drink socially. I found this thread so helpful- I really struggled to start with, I thought about drinking all the time and the weekends were torture as I would think about it all day. However coming onto this thread and finding others going through the same was just brilliant- I felt so proud of myself each day and when I did have a glass of wine at a social event but I didn’t crack the next day at home and started drinking in the house and haven’t drunk since . Losing weight and feeling amazing really helps focus the mind.

I wish I could tell you @Scoley76 I fell at the astro hurdle and drank on 31.01, and then haven't stopped.

I sleep worse, I look worse, I feel worse. Its not easy.