Roses are red, we like Becks Blue, Tryers to be Dryers push on through. 2019 will be our Valentine.

[Frouby]

Thread 4 for support, tips, tricks and friendship as we reduce our alcohol intake even more. For anyone who wants to reduce, stop, moderate or even just track their drinking.

Absolutely no judgement, just support. Everyone welcome.

Previous threads somewhere but am rubbish at clicky links.

Old tryers and new dryers, welcome to our thread. The one that starts in February and will see us all hit our goals as we move forwards.

Water, I'd be grateful for six days in Feb. I haven't managed this.

Longest, I laughed about the fish. At least you are getting paid for fishy business.

Anglaise, I am thinking of you. I'm so sorry about the thyroid problem, not to mention the DP situation. You sound like such a lovely, strong, special person. You really don't need or deserve anything other than devotion.

Frouby, I know you take the piss out of him, but your DH sounds fab. Anyone who is a good dad gets significant Brownie points from me.

I intended to be dry today, but am so, so, so not. I have probably had my units for this week in one night. The sodding - only - loo is terminally blocked. I have tried my best (have rodded drains etc), to no avail. Plumber is coming tomorrow. DC have decamped to XH's (this suits DD, as she doesn't have to face my wrath about my missing coat). So I am the only one peeing in a bucket. I am already worrying about Number Twos. It is amazing where your imagination will take you when you are put to the test.

Our marital home had a loo for each member of the family, and two to spare. I now almost wish I had stayed married just for this reason. Either that, or I wish I had bought a nice new house and not this ancient bugger with built-in plumbing problems.

FML.

Only one thing for it Dion....

...... PUB!!!

Hahahaha NC4. I made everyone go to have a pee in the pub earlier. The localish pub is my emergency loo back-up. Too late for me now, though. Wish me luck...

Dion - immodium 😉

However more seriously, Dion, that’s crap!! Just drink and don’t eat. Less chance of number 2’s!!

Immodium 😂😂😂 Love it, Flossie. Before the DC decamped, I had told them they were not to eat oranges or anything remotely resembling fibre (not much risk of this, I should add).

Hand hold, please.

DD has just rung, in floods of tears. Apparently XH is shouting at her about wet towels, and she wants me to collect her. Not possible. She is angry with me and says she is going to walk home because she can't stay with him. I rang XH. He is now angry with me for ringing him, but fuck that for a game of soldiers. I said she should just get a taxi home (at my expense, which is a laugh, given that I can't even afford a sodding bus fare), just so she can be safe. He put the phone down on me, so I now have no idea what's going on. FML yet again.

Oh Dion. That is awful. You poor thing. Really hope dd gets back safe and you are ok. Hand being held very tightly hunny

Thank you Flossie. He really is a bugger. Which is fine - but not for the DC. xx

Still no idea what's going on, BTW. Nobody is answering the phone...

DD has just answered her phone. She is getting a taxi home, so I hope I have some cash. That man is a fucking lunatic. She has school tomorrow. She is doing her GCSEs next year. Why does he have to create a problem out of nothing? She has had to put up with endless shit from him. Yet he continues to pile it on to her. She is, it's true, not easy either, and will not budge an inch if she can take the moral high ground (though she is not the problem- he is). And so I am still awake now and am waiting for her to arrive, when I should have been asleep a good hour ago. FML, FML, FML.

Dion - I hope she got home ok and was settled quickly. She must’ve been really stirred up inside. He seems like he has no shame. Poor you and poor dd. Sending you supportive hugs and love x

Anglaise if I remember correctly I was hyper for 4 months in total, perhaps a few weeks longer. It took me nearly 2 months of symptoms to get help as I was in the middle of a bit of a critical situation with my dad and his health. Busy dealing with that and not really able to recognize that I was sick. The biggest revelation for me was control of anxiety through beta blockers. I hadn't even recognized that my heart rate was so fast, let alone that that was causing anxiety. The endocrinologist I saw said that the condition was self-resolving and the meds were to control the symptoms of hyper (I believe levothyroxine is for hypo. My hypo stage was shorter and not that bigger deal). With the beta blockers I took Ibuprofen and a steroid. My doctor also gave me Xanax because I couldn't sleep but I didn't use it often because it's really addictive and I don't need another issue...

Dion sorry I missed your messages from yesterday evening, just now as I was jumping back into thyroid stuff. I hope things are a bit better this morning? Sending hugs.

Ah shit Dion hope she got back ok, what a fucker your ex is. Hope the plumber can sort your bog out too. If a number 2 is necessary before then you are going to need to line your bucket with a carrier bag. It's not glamourous but neither is shitting your pants 😂😂💩💩🙈.

Dh is a good un really, though an annoying fucker. He is a bloody good dad though. A bit Disney dad, dd is spoilt rotten. 3 ponies we had at one point in full livery and I was only earning £600 a month. We have everything we want, he works bloody hard to fund the lifestyle we have. We only ever disagree about money, he would spend every penny we have on the kids and I have to put the brakes on a bit sometimes. But he is a good bloke, even if he is untidy and likes blingy shit.

Had a few beers last night and went to the local for tea and a couple more. Dd is raging with us for being silly in the pub. Had something served in a little metal old fashioned pie dish, said to dh (jokingly) that it would lovely with a meat and potato pie in it, so he pretended to hide it under his jacket. Dd was furious which we found absolutely hysterical so proceeded to hide it in more and more elaborate places. Don't think she is talking to me yet.

Off to the ponies this morning, then my mums. Probably moderate tonight rather than be dry but am ok with that.

Dion I am sorry I missed all this. I hope DD is home safely and calmer this morning. I am so sorry you have so much shit to deal with, it doesn't seem fair.

Not sure if I will be dry for the rest of the week. Tonight I am going to a guide dog's retirement drinks (!) and tomorrow I am going to Oxford for a night away with the family. I went to uni there so will be nostalgia tastic.

Frouby he does sound like a good un. I married a piece of Euro-trash more than 20 years ago. I fully intended it to be a temporary measure while I looked for someone with aristocratic roots and a yacht but I was not paying attention and two decades slipped by. He has a job with significant responsibilities but can’t take the simplest domestic decision. We were low on instant coffee this morning, he stared at the near-empty jar for a good while before saying “should I put a pot on?” I just glared at him with about a dozen things to do before leaving for work. Nice bloke, good dad, lots of piss taking opportunities for me, still bloody annoying.
Our oldest boy is only 9 so only just learning to be embarrassed by us. He is learning fast though.
Was not dry last night, shared bottle of wine with dinner. Nothing else though. I almost feel better about a moderate night than a dry one honestly. Particularly in this case, cause preceded by 2 dry ones.

Thanks, Tryers.

Poor DD was very miserable. I left her as long as I could this morning, as she was also shattered, then drove her to school (which I don't normally do). She missed Assembly, but that's hardly the end of the world.

If she had a boyfriend who treats her in the way XH does, I'd advise her to dump and go NC on him. Being a parent does not give you a licence to treat someone like shit.

On the good side, the loo is working again, and I now have a large plumber's bill to pay on top of all my other woes.

Leaving, I know what you mean about moderation feeling like more of an achievement than an AF night. Moderation is the kind of 'normal' I am hoping to regain. I wasn't last night, though. Woke up in a hideous panic at 3 AM, and had bad dreams about being an alcoholic.

Frouby, it's very good to read about your DH, as I think you and your DD have had more than your fair share of a crap 'un, too.

Longest, I love the idea of a guide dog's retirement party. Oxford sounds good, too.

Ah Dion, your poor dd. Like you say, missing assembly is nothing in the scheme of things. She’s got a lovely mum who nurtured her. I hope today is a better day and this evening is better still x

So..back to the moderation debate..so I’m drinking half a bottle of wine a night (ok sometimes it edges to three quarters). I’m feeling toxin filled tho even with that!! I hate myself for feeling this way and every morning I promise myself I will go AF. Then it gets to this sort of time and I’m dreaming of that first glass about 8pm. I’ve reduced from a bottle every single night down to half to three quarters. But I’m still hating myself.

Poor dd dion. Me and dd did have a Wankerbastard in our lives. I went completely NC with him when dd was 3, so about 11 years ago, and dd when she was 12 so 2 years ago. I am so glad she did, he is a complete full weight wanker. She's happier for it, says she doesn't miss him and that he is a waste of space. I do bring the subject up occasionally tho, but she is adamant she doesn't want to contact him. He's never ever sent her a card since. Think if he had she would have called just to thank him for the card. His loss.

flossie I know how you feel. I am down to 1 or 2 drinks most nights, 3 or 4 on a wet one. On average 25 units a week. Which is better than before but still over the recommended amount. I am still trying to have more af nights. Am on a diet from monday anyway so hopefully that will help. I love lager and wine and will always have 2, whereas with gin 1 is sometimes enough amd less calories so hoping that helps.

4 cans tonight. Over about 3 hours though so don't even feel drunk. Which is daft really as it's a lot of calories for a gentle buzz. A gin would have done the same job. And been about 1/10th of the calories. Sigh. It's no wonder I am fat.

Frouby....is overweight and need this diet too. Got two stone to loose. What diet are you going to do?? I’ve done really well before dieting but need my head in the right place..right now it’s not. Am really struggling mentally to hold my shit together and not become an emotional wreck. Everyone around me is saying be kind to myself..so therefore I am....by eating everything in sight and washing it down with wine!!!!!!
But I know that’s not being kind..being kind is eating healthily, cutting right back on booze too.
I can’t believe I’m writing this but I’m in the 40’s when it comes to units!! Fmfl

I am often kind to myself by indulging myself. It’s not the answer but it’s what I do.
Back on WW today but darent weigh myself after the week I had last week. Total self sabotage. FML.

As for Wankerbastards, well... exH didn’t bother sending DS a card or text for his birthday yesterday. So that was shit. DS didn’t seem to notice, but I did. It’s been noted.

Sorry yours is acting up Dion. I hope DD is settling now.

I dont know yet Flossie. If I am honest we eat pretty well. I don't really have a sweet tooth, cook from scratch most nights, don't really bother with processed food, love salad and veg and fruit. My biggest problem is alcohol.

I have lost 2 st before with SW, but then got stuck at 11st 7lb. Which I would actually be happy with but then as it does, it crept back on again.

Am going to loosely follow sw, with 1/3 speed foods, lean protein and less bread. We don't eat fatty food as a rule anyway, airfryer chips once a week maybe? I need to cut bread right down, stop skipping breakfast and sometimes lunch, make sure I have soup and salad for lunch and then just a normal dinner. And cut right down on wine and lager.

I usually drop a bit of naturally this time of year anyway. We start getting busy on the allotment again, the ponies come back into work, will be walking more often than not on the school run and longer dog walks.

Ordered new batteries for my scales this morning as they need them. I am also going to write on my kitchen calander my weight each monday morning, that might keep me honest 😂😂😂.

Hello everyone. Well I was stuck in work and missed the guide dog retirement drinks, boo, so rang ahead and made dh open nice wine to celebrate mini holiday instead. Managed to make friends with an entirely different very licky guide dog while having a row with its arse of an owner who kept cutting me off mid-sentence while giving me a lecture on office security so that almost makes up....

Weight loss feels totally impossible atm. I was all set to try and do more exercise, which in turn seems to reduce my appetite, but my knees, ankles and groin have been in proper agony all week so not sure how wise that is, unless swimming, which I do love but is realistically limited by logistics as by the time I get there and back my exercise window is diminished. So that leaves diet, which is a prospect I do not relish -totally hate being hungry. Or having another baby and breastfeeding myself slim again and actually keeping it off this time. Also not a prospect I relish.

On the upside my diabetes tests all came back fine so obviously that is carte blanche to stay fat.

The annoying thing is I am following a low fat diet by proxy as dh can eat nothing fun, and I have been making soup to take to work for a while now. Dh has accidentally dropped kilos and kilos on this regime whereas I have put it on. I think it's random snacking which I am pretty bad at, especially when stuff is just in front of me eg at work, but I think my new office is slightly less bad at this than my last one, so fingers crossed.