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Original poster

DH just put jam on a crumpet...

205 replies

NeonBoomerang · 13/04/2023 21:43

He didn't even use butter.

Don't worry, I've already called the police.

In your opinion, what does belong on a crumpet?

OP posts:
BearKey · 13/04/2023 22:22

Butter and marmite. Sometimes with thin slices of melted cheese

Proudofeveryone · 13/04/2023 22:23

Around here you put lots and lots of butter then sprinkle with sugar 😋

SixPurpleChairs · 13/04/2023 22:23

How did you marry a man who doesn't butter his crumpet? I certainly wouldn't advertise the fact I had. He may as well have spread it on an envelope. What does he think the holes are for?

FatAgainItsLettuceTime · 13/04/2023 22:26

Butter and scrambled egg is my favourite crumpet topping, butter and cheddar cheese comes in second, butter and jam is third choice.

Butter always though!

determinedtomakethiswork · 13/04/2023 22:27

Growlybear83 · 13/04/2023 21:50

A bit of butter and marmite. But the crumpet should only be very lightly toasted - not at all browned.

I would ban you from my house if you cooked them like that. They should be brown and crisp!

DeadButDelicious · 13/04/2023 22:27

Butter.
Jam (sorry OP, jam on a crumpet is delicious).
Nutella.
Garlic mushrooms with a bit of melty cheese.
Pizza sauce and cheese.
Just cheese.

Gonna have to try lemon curd now I've heard of it. Not had lemon curd for ages.

SixPurpleChairs · 13/04/2023 22:28

DeadButDelicious · 13/04/2023 22:27

Butter.
Jam (sorry OP, jam on a crumpet is delicious).
Nutella.
Garlic mushrooms with a bit of melty cheese.
Pizza sauce and cheese.
Just cheese.

Gonna have to try lemon curd now I've heard of it. Not had lemon curd for ages.

Yes, jam on top of the butter.

OP surely you checked in the first few dates how he ate them?

Els1e · 13/04/2023 22:29

Butter! No more required

wanttokickoffbutcant · 13/04/2023 22:30

Also here for the butter and Marmite love - but I let my cat lick the plate which I know is disgusting :( but she loves it...

escplc · 13/04/2023 22:30

Most certainly butter.

Northernsouloldies · 13/04/2023 22:32

NeonBoomerang · 13/04/2023 21:43

He didn't even use butter.

Don't worry, I've already called the police.

In your opinion, what does belong on a crumpet?

A bin bag, crumpets are foul things. Pancakes... Mmmmm with jam.

DarcyProudman · 13/04/2023 22:32

NooNooHead1981 · 13/04/2023 21:46

Lots of Lurpak and Marmite. On a hot crunchy crumpet.

Just realised that sounds a bit kinky 😳 😅

That is MY perfect crumpet!! Exactly how I eat them 😊

emmathedilemma · 13/04/2023 22:32

Leave the b@stard

fishonabicycle · 13/04/2023 22:32

Butter with jam, lemon curd or marmite. Or peanut butter and lemon curd together.

AllIeveknewonlyou · 13/04/2023 22:32

😯 the horrors.

I have never violated my crumpets' innocence. Always only butter.

slowquickstep · 13/04/2023 22:33

Cheese and marmite for my DH, Butter and bramble jelly for me.

fruitbrewhaha · 13/04/2023 22:33

Marmite and cheese
cheese and Worcestershire sauce
butter and honey

stopringingme · 13/04/2023 22:34

Crumpet toppings (in no particular order of preference)

Butter and marmite

Butter, marmite and cheese

Butter and jam

Butter and honey

Butter, cheese and pickle

Butter

Cream cheese and black pepper

Calmontheoutsider · 13/04/2023 22:35

Butter and pâté

OnTheRunWithMannyMontana · 13/04/2023 22:35

My DH eats them dry after toasting them twice so it sounds like a giant chewing rocks.

Not sure how I haven't killed him yet.

I am butter only or butter and marmite. DD is butter and plastic cheese slices.

Denise82 · 13/04/2023 22:36

Margarine flora buttery for me and nothing else, occasionally some scrambled egg 😋

Spacie · 13/04/2023 22:37

Butter and extra salt

Ivebeenframed · 13/04/2023 22:38

Butter and strawberry jam 🍓

AdoraBell · 13/04/2023 22:38

Butter first followed by butter then whatever is required. Apricot jam is my favourite topping, strong cheddar if I’m actually hungry. DH is allowed to put his choice of jam or marmalade.

OP when the police arrive hand over the body and show the mitigating evidence.

Toddlerteaplease · 13/04/2023 22:40

Only butter!