Things I learned too late in life

[Spiceup]

No one anywhere has ever had their life improved by me wearing high heels. I now wear comfy shoes for every occasion and life is immeasurably better. I can move quicker, get more done in a day and never miss any fun because my feet hurt or I don't have suitable footwear. I don't know what on earth possessed me for so long.

What's yours?

That it's not just fine, it's important to say 'No' and to mean it.
It's better to be kind than to be right.
That doing Am Dram gives you enormous confidence in lots of areas. If you can march on stage as if you own it, wearing a nightie and fishnets in your 60s, you have the confidence to do anything (almost).

Look after your back.

Get a chain on your front door. It will save your possessions from burglars.

So much brilliant life advice here! Have specifically bookmarked "that I can cope" to give to myself and others around me.

The world is awash in wine. You don't have to drink it all. You don't have to drink AT all if you don't want to.

The friend who is good fun on a night out does not necessarily make a good holiday/travel companion

The opposite is also true: people who you are not particularly friendly with in normal life can be good travel companions - and can be a safer bet than risking a good friendship, only to find that you're holiday-incompatible.

Other people's opinion of you usually says more about them than it does about you

Be creative, it enriches your life

You can love your friends but still be disappointed by them sometimes, and that's ok

Do not take financial advice from your parents

be financially independant always and never depend upon anyone on your happiness

Getting in debt is perilous

When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.

This. I cringe looking back at the bad treatment I put up with in the past thinking or hoping they would change, trying to explain their behaviour away to myself. If I had just done X they wouldn’t have done Y.

All confidence is a Jedi mind trick. If you treat yourself like you’re worth a million dollars, other people will too.

Don't take iron pills and codeine at the same time.
Don't ignore chronic pain. Sometimes you have to be the squeaky wheel to get the grease. No, it's not normal to be in pain every minute of every day.
You're allowed to not spend time with people you generally don't get on with.
In 100 years, no-one will care. Unless you're Hitler, so don't be Hitler.

Not only can you survive on your own, but you can be perfectly contented and secure. Therefore, don't ever put up with shit from a man just because you don't think you can manage without him.

That you can say no to things you don't want to do.......... Unfortunately nearly 60 before I was brave enough🤷

Turn off the electric toothbrush before adding the toothpaste

Notjaneausten 😬😂😂

"Don't borrow trouble from the future."

I still spend too much time on "what ifs" to the extent that it paralyzes me with fear and I end up doing nothing, such as changing jobs etc.

Learn what shame is, how it affects us, how to overcome it.

One of the biggest regrets of the dying is prioritising work over family as well as living a life they thought they should rather than what they wanted.

A lot of men are horrible and selfish and not worth the effort.

You don’t have to say yes to nights out drinking and weekends away.

That men madly fancying you when you are younger is NOT a huge compliment i.e. doesn't mean you are exceptional - you realise later on that they can equally fancy a much less attarctive woman, it's no big deal and doesn't mean they'll love you as a person even if madly passionate for a while.
That most men are quitte calculating when choosing a life partner, i.e. she needs to be capable and offer a lot on practical level (that often means financially too) rather than just going by strong feelings - this was quite a shock to me in my 30s.

Never link your finances completely with another person. Keep a separate account that is yours, and only yours, to be used at your discretion. Of course, that works both ways!

Always have evidence, keep read receipts. People never believe you otherwise.

I learnt that for me at least, embarrassment is largely optional. I can cringe at the memory of saying something stupid on a date, or farting audibly in the office. Or I can just shrug and think “meh”. And if I shrug off the embarrassment, it rarely comes back to haunt me.

All confidence is a Jedi mind trick. If you treat yourself like you’re worth a million dollars, other people will too.

Love this one.

@Brittanyspringer

Always have evidence, keep read receipts. People never believe you otherwise.

I’m a big believer in covering my arse at work by having an email trail. I once had a colleague who fancied me, but I didn’t feel the same, so I let him down gently.

Clearly he didn’t take this well, because he started slagging me off to another colleague, telling her I’d started tasks and left them unfinished. Luckily, I was able to prove him wrong.

Everything! Stuff about what to tolerate from men, primarily. Youth is wasted on the young.

Mortgages are cheap money so prioritise your pension/investments and don't overpay your mortgage

Overpaying your mortgage is a tax free return on investment so you should take that into account when comparing it to other investments.

Not overpaying it and investing elsewhere is equivalent to borrowing money so as to play the stock market which you should basically never do.

Great thread. Can we all please disseminate this to our DDs and young friends and colleagues?

A clean diet can clear acne of the non-cystic kind. Cut out the dairy and meats, bump up the greens and drink more water. Just do it, and don't discuss it with the "oh, but" crowd.

Dancing (of any kind) will keep your muscles toned, your mind happy and your metabolism a fiery furnace. Keep on grooving to your favourite music.

If you've made a sterling effort in your job but the boss's pet is promoted over you and you are expected to train him in the job then do his job for him while he skips off on lunch with his friends or books an office car so that he can go home at lunch for a nap, FIND A NEW JOB AND LEAVE. Plodding on and hoping for recognition smacks of delusion and a lack of self-respect.

Also, don’t save anything for ‘best’. That day might never come. Yes. My parents never did use their wedding Wedgwood, and now it's too late. I'm using up my perfume collection henceforth.