Things I learned too late in life

[Spiceup]

No one anywhere has ever had their life improved by me wearing high heels. I now wear comfy shoes for every occasion and life is immeasurably better. I can move quicker, get more done in a day and never miss any fun because my feet hurt or I don't have suitable footwear. I don't know what on earth possessed me for so long.

What's yours?

@GoodnightGrandma

You don’t really see your hair, clothes and make up so don’t worry about them.

I have never seen my hair, makeup and clothes so much as in the last 18 months when WFH and endless video calls. Hell, they never mattered so much to me.

So what I learned too late - the important of a good hair cut and colour

@Embroidery

Women are mean and you dont have to follow their myriad of rules. Sorry for saying that on here xx

Women are not mean. People are mean. There’s nothing special about men that makes them nicer.

Every thing you worry will happen? That shit won’t happen- other shit happens that you didn’t think of…. so there is no point in worrying!!

Thank you for sharing all of this ! So useful

Choose your life partner wisely. Instead of going for someone fun and exciting, go for someone stable and calm.
Start a career as soon as you leave uni. Don't pause it for too long whilst having babies.
Dreams change. Focusing too much on one dream might permanently close doors from others that you might desperately want in the future.
Start marriage councelling when things are still good and happy. It will save you from a future disaster when things go wrong, and they do.

Spend some time living alone when you are young. . It’s immensely freeing. You will always know throughout your life that, whilst it may not be your ideal choice, you will be ok on your own.

I wish I had had more boundaries around work and carved out time for regular exercise, rather than always being the dependable one who would start early, finish late etc. That would have been much better for my mental and physical health.

Understand pensions and the benefits of tax relief.

Remember, you do not like everyone so don't expect everyone to like you.

If it feels wrong walk away.

Do what you enjoy as often as you can.

I am in my fifties and now know that I am the most important person in my life. That's not to say I wouldn't risk my life or even give up my life for my kids (in an emergency) - because I would. But the person who's opinion means the most and who needs to be central to my decisions is...ME!

LatteLady

"Do what you enjoy as often as you can."

love it! XXXX

If you find yourself dating any of the following, cut your losses and leave:

Someone who doesn’t take responsibility for their own actions
Someone who is unreliable and lets you down
Someone who you don’t really enjoy kissing
Someone who has lied to you about his job, age, living circumstances etc. There will probably be a lot more lies where that one came from.
Someone who has displayed violent or threatening behaviour
Someone with an addiction problem or other serious issues who won’t seek help - you can’t fix them

[quote ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba]@QueeniesCroft

it's when you leave a party without saying goodbye. it was such a revelation to learn that you don't have to say goodbye to everyone and their dog by going round the room, hugging & kissing (and I don't mean post-Covid). urgh. took forever!

now we thank the host (obviously I still have some manners), say bye to whomever is in the vicinity then go.[/quote]
I’d actually associate Irish goodbyes with the complete opposite. It takes my Irish family ages to say goodbye! They’ll start saying bye then start chatting and sit down again/another cup of tea for the road. Alternatively people will stand out at the door for another 30 mins talking. It’s the same on the phone, think Mrs Doyle for the amount of times they’ll say goodbye before hanging up. At uni my friend counted I’d said goodbye 7 times to my granny

Don't wait for someone to love you.

Learn to love yourself, and orbit your own sun.

Ironically, this is when others start to love you!

Comparison is the thief of joy.

Volunteering and being involved in serving others benefits yourself more than anyone else along the way.

There are few examples on getting rich with compound interest but no one talks about the compound interest on your own mortgage that EVERYONE with a mortgage has…. Bottom line, if you have spare money, do overpayments on your mortgage. And Make sure you get on a mortgage that allows you to do so.

@Rachellow

sure. associate away!

but the dictionary definition of the phrase is: ducking or sneaking out of a party, social gathering or date without bidding farewell.
it's not my opinion, that's what it means

Body hair is completely natural and you're under no obligation to remove it.

People who try to make you feel shit about yourself aren't your friends. You owe them nothing.

You can say no.

There's nothing wrong with being an introvert. You don't have to pretend otherwise, it's very tiring.

@VaccineSticker

There are few examples on getting rich with compound interest but no one talks about the compound interest on your own mortgage that EVERYONE with a mortgage has…. Bottom line, if you have spare money, do overpayments on your mortgage. And Make sure you get on a mortgage that allows you to do so.

We did this in the last year of secondary school - well, explaining and calculating compound interest. We also learned how to calculate APR based upon the monthly rate - which for those of us who listened made it very easy to give the Provvi loan bloke on the doorstep a Look and ask what the APR was on their 'you just pay eleven pounds a week for three months'.

Dont get married
Keep your own bank account
Save. You will need it at some point
Make time for yourself. Nobody else will.

Women are mean and you dont have to follow their myriad of rules

There are 'rules' ?

Being a good mum is great, but your children don't really see what you did or care. Live your life for you

I don’t disagree that “some” decisions should be made just for you. However, my DC are in their 30’s and on a reasonably regular basis will tell me that they appreciate certain things I did for them. So overall I have to disagree with this statement. Yes they don’t appreciate every single little thing. But overall they do recognise that I made sacrifices, worked hard to give them a good life etc.

@NeverDropYourMooncup I used to love a Provvi loan, I knew what I was paying though, but at the time that was my only line of credit. Do they still exist ?

It really doesn’t matter what strangers think of you, or colleagues, most of whom won’t remember you if you leave

Mine is what you put in doesn't always mean you get an equal amount back, be it effort at work or in relationships, be wary of situations where you put in a lot and get little in return.

That most people will take the piss out of a trusting nature if they think theyll get away with it.

A super-clean house means you get a professional in, or you have too much time on your hands.
Anyone who dislikes animals is a sociopath and best avoided.
Botox doesn't make you look younger...just zombie like.
Listen to actions, not words from men and women. Lots of fast talkers in the world.
People who are mean to you have their own issues, and it is not about you.
Never get married, and if you must...get a pre-nuptial agreement if you got anything you would not wish to share later.