can you help me out with this?

Something often overlooked in this kind of situation is who gets to define the to do list.

You sound like you do a lot more housework than me. I wouldn't be prepared to do half of that as my 'share'.

This is a very common problem women have higher standards for their home. Perhaps you could start by getting him to discuss what he thinks needs to be done, and get some compromise that way.

Our house isn't as clean as I would like it, but DH and I share what gets done fairly.

It's like a game of chicken, isn't it. My DH reads feminist literature, is completely pro-equality, but just has this trouble putting principles into action.. and then he always says (rightly) that he does so much more than most men.. well yes, but it's still not 50% so it's not enough!

i just stopped doing anything. its much more difficult with DCs, but if you are willing to grit your teeth and bare it, it works.(it was the hardest thing ever for me because i am a control freak).

because the thing is, your DH 'gets it' alright. he just knows that you will give in before he does.

For reasons I don't quite understand, DH thinks it is immoral to have a cleaner. If he doesn't do enough round house my threat is that we are getting a cleaner. It works (for a time).
We did once have a sticker chart in the past - worked quite well for a time (we both got stickers if jobs done). That was before DC mind so was more of a joke.

No, that's true - it's not for you, it's for all of you.

I don't know, sorry. I am not very good at wording things - the idea is there but the wording doesn't come right really.

Just my opinion - but if it was the other way around, I'd feel really patronised by having a sign telling me a real adult/man/person does X Y or Z. I wouldn't see it as inspiring TBH. That might just be me though.

I would probably take a different approach and just have a chat with him along the lines of "Look, we have a problem here. I feel as though I always end up doing the lion's share when you are home even when we work stuff out. Can we work together on this?" Perhaps you could start by over the course of a couple of weeks when he is away, at the end of each day list everything you have done that he could potentially have helped with if he was there. Or write yourself a big "to do" list and stick it up on a noticeboard or something, which are the jobs which need to be done in the house that day to keep the house running, and just remind him/the children when they are old enough, that you approach it as a team (maybe think of a less cheesy word though!) and something like every time you start a job say "Oh, give us a hand with this will you?" "Love, could you bring the washing in for me while I get the dinner on?"

Basically try to come around to the idea (and ask him to) that the household chores are your "job" and when he's there, he is a "colleague", and when they are finished, you are both back to the roles of husband and wife but there is no more housework and you are free to do as you please.