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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Teenage boy receives referral order after stabbing girl who rejected him

144 replies

Iheartmysmart · 22/09/2026 15:18

This happened locally to me. A 14 year old girl turned down the advances of a teenage boy who then used fake social media accounts to harass her. When she refused to go out with him, he followed her into a shop and stabbed her repeatedly. He also stabbed the shop owner who tried to intervene.

What did this little pillar of the community get as a punishment, a restraining order and a 12 month referral order. I’m so bloody angry that the safety of women and girls is seen as unimportant and the sentences given to offenders are so pathetic.

The victim impact statement is heartbreaking.

Sorry about the DM link, it’s in my local paper but behind a paywall https://www.dailymail.com/news/article-16150735/Moment-schoolboy-follows-girl-repeatedly-stabs.html

Moment schoolboy follows girl and stabs her in shop

The 14-year-old boy, who cannot be named for legal reasons, launched the attack in Cirencester, Gloucestershire, on the morning of March 15 after she refused to go on a date with him.

https://www.dailymail.com/news/article-16150735/Moment-schoolboy-follows-girl-repeatedly-stabs.html

OP posts:
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11
alcovecupboards · 23/09/2026 12:32

ArabellaScott · 23/09/2026 12:18

What is a referral order, can anyone elucidate?

They're sort of community justice type things - aimed at treating the cause of the offending and a sort of community justice rather than imprisonment. Hard to see why it was appropriate in this case.

ArabellaScott · 23/09/2026 12:32

Referral order:

https://sentencingcouncil.org.uk/pronouncement-builder/referral-order/

'You will meet a panel of people who are there to help you. You will be able to talk with them about yourself and your offending ............ [give details].
They will then ask you to agree and sign a contract that will include activities to stop you offending again.'

Referral order

https://sentencingcouncil.org.uk/pronouncement-builder/referral-order

ArabellaScott · 23/09/2026 12:36

It would be helpful to know more about what the referral order might involve.

For a serious crime like this, committed so young, one would hope there would be serious and intensive efforts to try to stop it from happening again.

It would be good to know that it might be possible to stop boys from going on to become violent men. But we need to know what that actually involves and how successful it is or isn't.

ArabellaScott · 23/09/2026 12:37

alcovecupboards · 23/09/2026 12:32

They're sort of community justice type things - aimed at treating the cause of the offending and a sort of community justice rather than imprisonment. Hard to see why it was appropriate in this case.

Thanks, I see they involve a panel for youth offenders, but there's not masses of info on what that might involve. I imagine it varies depending on the crime and context.

murasaki · 23/09/2026 12:38

alcovecupboards · 23/09/2026 12:30

I put my DD (and DS actually) in self defence classes at 13 - precisely because of behaviour like this. It is absolutely terrifying. One of her classmates had been sexually assaulted (outside of school) but then physically assaulted inside of school by the boy's sister after the fact. Neither were suspended let alone excluded but the victim was the one who had to leave because no one kept her safe. No police action and the school went out of its way to 'clarify rumours'. I do suppose their hands were tied but it's blindingly obvious what happened.

That's appalling, the poor victim.

ArabellaScott · 23/09/2026 12:39

https://yjlc.uk/resources/legal-updates/referral-orders-most-effective-sentence-reducing-re-offending

'An HM Inspectorate of Probation report says Referral Orders are consistently more effective than other sentences in achieving their aims of reducing offending, however improvements could be made to make them more effective.
Details

  • *The report provides a comprehensive summary of the effectiveness of Referral Orders in achieving their primary aim: to prevent young people reoffending and providing a restorative justice approach to achieve this. The report states that in the year to March 2015 12,039 Referral Orders were given to young people in England and Wales compared with 10,653 youth rehabilitation orders, 2,387 custodial sentences and 229 other sentences such as reparation orders. Additionally the report found that published re-offending rates were consistently better for Referral Orders than Youth Rehabilitation Orders and other custodial sentences: ‘In the 2013/2014 cohort of cases, the latest data available at the time of writing, the reoffending rate within 12 months was 39.4%, compared to 64.5% for those subject to YRO’'

Unfortunately the report doesn't seem to be listed on the gov website anymore, but this article has some stats.

Meadowfinch · 23/09/2026 12:39

napody · 23/09/2026 08:40

Thank you- I have just done this. A small action to signal to the government that an epidemic of misogynistic violence is going unaddressed. I wouldn't be surprised if he'd intended to kill her.

Also done.

WTAF is wrong with this spineless govt?

EasternStandard · 23/09/2026 12:40

This is terrifying. The poor girl.

murasaki · 23/09/2026 12:41

It still sounds a bit like:

So, you don't react well to girls turning you down?
No
Well will you promise not to stab them if they do?
Suppose so
Right, sign here.

ArabellaScott · 23/09/2026 12:41

EasternStandard · 23/09/2026 12:40

This is terrifying. The poor girl.

Yes. I hope she is given lots of quality support and is able to recover fully.

ArabellaScott · 23/09/2026 12:42

murasaki · 23/09/2026 12:41

It still sounds a bit like:

So, you don't react well to girls turning you down?
No
Well will you promise not to stab them if they do?
Suppose so
Right, sign here.

It comes under probation services.

'https://hmiprobation.justiceinspectorates.gov.uk/document/annual-report-2026/

'...our inspections have chronicled an organisation grappling with serious systemic challenges, an increasingly large and complex caseload, and continuous change. In the latest year for which figures are available we saw increasing numbers being released from prison, an increasing probation caseload, and an increasing proportion of the caseload being managed in the community..

Annual Report 2026 – HM Inspectorate of Probation

Inspecting probation and
 youth justice services.

https://hmiprobation.justiceinspectorates.gov.uk/document/annual-report-2026

ArabellaScott · 23/09/2026 12:43

'the Probation Service has too few staff, with too little experience, managing too many cases. '

Not really very reassuring.

alcovecupboards · 23/09/2026 12:45

ArabellaScott · 23/09/2026 12:37

Thanks, I see they involve a panel for youth offenders, but there's not masses of info on what that might involve. I imagine it varies depending on the crime and context.

They're quite targeted. It's effectively a way to prioritise levels of support, therapy etc that are otherwise not there. They work quite well on things like anti-social behaviour/repeated shoplifting when the reasons behind the offending can be addressed with intensive support. With this though - it's not appropriate. The victim's right to be safe is more important than the offender staying out of a facility.

ArabellaScott · 23/09/2026 12:46

Geezo.

'In April 2025 we published our National Inspection of Probation Services, a report designed to give a comprehensive picture of the national arrangements that enable or hinder effective probation delivery. That inspection’s findings were sobering. We identified major shortfalls in national arrangements to support service delivery and keep people safe, with an overall rating of ‘Requires improvement’. Public protection emerged as a persistent and serious area of weakness, a finding that was to define much of our work for the rest of the year and across our strategic plans moving forward.
Our inspection programme across regions and probation delivery units (PDUs) told a similarly concerning story. Inspections in the North East, the East Midlands, and Wales all identified public protection as a consistent area of weakness. Every PDU inspected was rated either ‘Inadequate’ or ‘Requires improvement’.'

However, wrt youth services it seems more positive:

' we continued to see strong results across the sector. In general, stable workforces, manageable workloads, and high-quality staff supervision were contributing to a youth justice system that helped to have a positive impact on the lives of children under the supervision of youth justice services (YJS).'

https://hmiprobation.justiceinspectorates.gov.uk/document/annual-report-2026/#5-Youthjusticeserviceinspections

National Inspection – April 2025 – HM Inspectorate of Probation

Inspecting probation and
 youth justice services.

https://hmiprobation.justiceinspectorates.gov.uk/document/national-inspection-april-2025/

murasaki · 23/09/2026 12:46

alcovecupboards · 23/09/2026 12:45

They're quite targeted. It's effectively a way to prioritise levels of support, therapy etc that are otherwise not there. They work quite well on things like anti-social behaviour/repeated shoplifting when the reasons behind the offending can be addressed with intensive support. With this though - it's not appropriate. The victim's right to be safe is more important than the offender staying out of a facility.

Yes, I can see it's a constructive approach for some things, but as you say, surely the violence here means it's not appropriate.

ArabellaScott · 23/09/2026 12:47

alcovecupboards · 23/09/2026 12:45

They're quite targeted. It's effectively a way to prioritise levels of support, therapy etc that are otherwise not there. They work quite well on things like anti-social behaviour/repeated shoplifting when the reasons behind the offending can be addressed with intensive support. With this though - it's not appropriate. The victim's right to be safe is more important than the offender staying out of a facility.

I agree the victim's right to be safe should be paramount.

Should be possible for him to get support and therapy etc while detained, so it doesn't really seem to be an either/or situation.

alcovecupboards · 23/09/2026 12:53

ArabellaScott · 23/09/2026 12:43

'the Probation Service has too few staff, with too little experience, managing too many cases. '

Not really very reassuring.

It's been chronically underfunded for years. There was a case I knew about a few years ago where the probation officer had tried to claim he was unaware the offender (a violent armed robber) he was meant to be monitoring had moved out of the home he was allegedly living in (his mother's one bedroom council flat), had moved in with a new woman and gained access to her children. The man was arrested repeatedly for domestic violence but because he lived in one LA area, was arrested by the police of another one, and under the probation services of another - it went under the radar. There was no joined up thinking and phone calls were replacing meetings and spot checks just don't happen. The entire system is buckling and we have 18 months wait sometime for justice - at which point some cases cannot be prosecuted. They've blamed covid but actually there's just been a complete betrayal of our justice system - and associated services. Then more people leave, fewer people have to take on more work and shit like this happens.

alcovecupboards · 23/09/2026 12:58

ArabellaScott · 23/09/2026 12:47

I agree the victim's right to be safe should be paramount.

Should be possible for him to get support and therapy etc while detained, so it doesn't really seem to be an either/or situation.

It absolutely should be but it isn't. Once they're in detention - you effectively surround them with other criminals and as a group they become resistant to the support offered. Sadly we don't have an appropriate prison system in this country that works towards rehabilitation. It's basically just deprivation of liberty and the odd literacy or numeracy course. Kennelling for dangerous people if you will.

ArabellaScott · 23/09/2026 12:59

Well. It's a deterrent and it may remove him from whatever situation has caused or encouraged him to stab a girl who rejects him. So may be worthwhile anyway.

ERthree · 23/09/2026 13:05

PerkingFaintly · 22/09/2026 17:51

I've just seen another thread which paints an even more serious picture of the online environment for youngsters than I'd understood.

The article in that OP is about Australia, but the trend exists in the UK too, alas.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/feminism/5581057-new-international-online-threat-to-young-girls-australian-federal-police-speak

I hope a poster on that thread won't mind if I C&P her account of what was said by the Australian police:

That it is a gaming culture kind of thing where teen boys and young men (the ages she gives are around 17 I think) in online groups identify "hunt stalk and draw in" young girls from a range of online platforms and begin grooming her, then intimidating, exploiting and controlling her, and forcing her into acts of violence against themselves, siblings, others, pets etc. She says they are decentralised loosely affiliated networks, in Australia and off-shore, groups glorifying sadistic online exploitation, cyber attacks and violence. They are based on nilism, sadism, nazism and satanism. Most of their victims pre-teen or teenage girls. She describes it as a new and disturbing front in gender-based violence. 59 potential offenders identified in Aus, three arrests made, and some also overseas. Perpetrators are predominantly white middle class.

Even if this wasn't a direct factor in the actions of the boy who stabbed the 14-year-old girl, this is the sea in which teens are now swimming.

And yet nearly every parent on here and in this country gives their children free access to the internet. Banning under 18s from owning/using mobile phones is way overdue.

lcakethereforeIam · 23/09/2026 13:10

alcovecupboards · 23/09/2026 12:53

It's been chronically underfunded for years. There was a case I knew about a few years ago where the probation officer had tried to claim he was unaware the offender (a violent armed robber) he was meant to be monitoring had moved out of the home he was allegedly living in (his mother's one bedroom council flat), had moved in with a new woman and gained access to her children. The man was arrested repeatedly for domestic violence but because he lived in one LA area, was arrested by the police of another one, and under the probation services of another - it went under the radar. There was no joined up thinking and phone calls were replacing meetings and spot checks just don't happen. The entire system is buckling and we have 18 months wait sometime for justice - at which point some cases cannot be prosecuted. They've blamed covid but actually there's just been a complete betrayal of our justice system - and associated services. Then more people leave, fewer people have to take on more work and shit like this happens.

Unless something is done it seems as if it's in a death spiral. I've seen similar articles about the Police and the prison service.

ArabellaScott · 23/09/2026 13:24

ERthree · 23/09/2026 13:05

And yet nearly every parent on here and in this country gives their children free access to the internet. Banning under 18s from owning/using mobile phones is way overdue.

That's not a realistic proposal.

For a start, 16 year olds can be living alone, getting married, working and earning their own money, etc. Secondly, half of modern life relies on mobile phones now. For transport, payments, banking, let alone all of the myriad other things people use their phones for.

ZeldaFighter · 23/09/2026 13:29

Heard all about the failures of the perpetrator's parents in relation to the horrific Southport attacks. I guess as the male offender is white, there's no need to scrutinise and judge his family background.

Or will his parents face some consequences for raising a violent child, happy to act on his violent thoughts? As a 14yo, don't his parents have some legal liability?

MrsBatshitRatshit · 23/09/2026 13:40

HermioneWeasley · 22/09/2026 17:14

And Labour want to convince us they take VAWG seriously

it’s beyond a joke

I don't see what Labour have to do with it. The sentence was imposed by a judge, not by Labour or any political party.

anyolddinosaur · 23/09/2026 13:44

As far as I can see he was only charged with stabbing the girl. What about the shopkeeper who was also stabbed - he should have been charged with an offence for that.