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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

I finally said something in public at work

133 replies

AlPaccacino · 15/09/2026 22:20

We had a training day at work about making assumptions and the way that we as emergency service workers need to think about how and why we stereotype.
Part of it was looking at celebrities and saying whether we thought they were sad or bad (holding up cards) And lo and behold JKR came up. Of course there was the usual (twattish) bloke (TB). “Oh she’s so bad. She’s a transphobe” I immediately said she’s neither. She’s a bloody queen. And also pointed out that she’d never said anything that could be considered transphobic, but standing up for women.

A surprising amount of other people agreed with me and then gratifyingly, the trainer also said that before including her in the series of photo, he’d read through everything she has said and he agreed that all she has done is to protect women’s spaces.

I was so happy, scared, worried etc but I bloody did it. I’ve only ever spoken in the shadows, as it were, with people that I’d quietly sounded out before. À year ago, I would probably have been looking at the possibility of a discussion with management if not a disciplinary, and now this.
TB made some grumbling about what he’d heard and read and then settled down into a grump. He has form for being a twat generally in discussions but this time he got shut down by the room.

OP posts:
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Manyanamanyana · 21/09/2026 13:35

alcovecupboards · 17/09/2026 23:51

He is when someone is defending him and claiming he is innocent. He's a wife beater. The High Court ruled on that.

This is the Sex and Gender board, you might have more luck with this topic over on the relationships board, or something...

Igmum · 21/09/2026 08:47

GNU Sir TP

ErrolTheDragon · 18/09/2026 06:49

Not that there’s anything weird about Binky, he’s a lovely horse.

Rollingpinofdoom · 18/09/2026 06:16

ElenOfTheWays · 17/09/2026 10:05

She was named after DEATH'S horse? No wonder she's a bit weird

I was going to say that!! .

MyAmpleSheep · 18/09/2026 00:18

alcovecupboards · 17/09/2026 23:51

He is when someone is defending him and claiming he is innocent. He's a wife beater. The High Court ruled on that.

But what has he got to do with JK Rowling?

alcovecupboards · 17/09/2026 23:51

TheKeatingFive · 17/09/2026 19:53

I’m no fan of Johnny Depp, trust me, but he is of zero relevance here

He is when someone is defending him and claiming he is innocent. He's a wife beater. The High Court ruled on that.

DisappearingGirl · 17/09/2026 22:43

That's really heartening OP, and that several people agreed with you.

I love my colleagues but sadly suspect I would still be in the minority ...

TheGardenPond · 17/09/2026 21:28

Brilliant, well done OP! Thank you.

AskingQuestionsAllTheTime · 17/09/2026 21:09

It has occurred to me that it's a bit like the old cartoon of the young couple having a party with people from work at it, in which the man is saying to the woman "No, honey, don't bring the baby down. Everyone here either has one or hasn't."

It would be grand to say to the TRA "Oh do give it a rest. Everyone here either agrees with you or doesn't."

AskingQuestionsAllTheTime · 17/09/2026 20:58

ArabellaScott · 16/09/2026 21:18

I think the 'hip' ship sailed long ago, tbh

JKR hate is dreary and boring even for the most rabid incels. Who is still gnashing their teeth over it in 2026?

I was verbally attacked for not agreeing loudly enough with someone who was having a two-minute hate about her, earlier this year.... Some fanatical prannets are still having a public go at her every time they see an opportunity to do so, and very boring it was too.

TheKeatingFive · 17/09/2026 19:53

alcovecupboards · 17/09/2026 19:47

The High Court found him to be a serial domestic abuser of his then wife Amber. There is no excuse for that and no-one should be defending a wife beater.

I’m no fan of Johnny Depp, trust me, but he is of zero relevance here

alcovecupboards · 17/09/2026 19:47

RhannionKPSS · 16/09/2026 23:23

Oh and Johnny Depp was not found guilty of anything, he and Amber were clearly a highly toxic couple

The High Court found him to be a serial domestic abuser of his then wife Amber. There is no excuse for that and no-one should be defending a wife beater.

ElenOfTheWays · 17/09/2026 10:05

TheKeatingFive · 16/09/2026 09:13

Binky 😂

She was named after DEATH'S horse? No wonder she's a bit weird

lcakethereforeIam · 17/09/2026 00:22

I don't think JKR had any control over casting.

Well done OP.

RhannionKPSS · 16/09/2026 23:23

Oh and Johnny Depp was not found guilty of anything, he and Amber were clearly a highly toxic couple

RhannionKPSS · 16/09/2026 23:21

This reply has been deleted

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AlPaccacino · 16/09/2026 21:41

Just popped back on to say thank you. I’m not rising to the bait to defend myself to the likes of TPA. But no consequences today, apart from a quiet thank you from a colleague today .

It was only a few years ago that we had a menopause conference with a male officer who ‘identified as a women’ as a speaker comparing the shortage of his drug therapy during lockdown to the menopause. The only thing I did then was roll my eyes and a covert moan when back in the office, whilst comparing our dinosaur pin badges 😂. I definitely wasn’t brave then.

OP posts:
Hellorainyday · 16/09/2026 21:24

Courage calls to courage.

ArabellaScott · 16/09/2026 21:18

I think the 'hip' ship sailed long ago, tbh

JKR hate is dreary and boring even for the most rabid incels. Who is still gnashing their teeth over it in 2026?

GreyskySexRealistsky · 16/09/2026 21:15

Wokeandwoofing nails it:

https://x.com/wokeandwoofing/status/2099600706151813261

🚨Breaking News:

An actor who played 'Third Quidditch fan from the back' in a Harry Potter film, has spoken out against JK Rowling. Beardy McWomanhater, has been quoted as saying 'If attacking Rowling makes me seem hip and relevant, I'd be mad not to do it'

TheKeatingFive · 16/09/2026 20:21

All of this is completely misrepresented or simply of no relevance.

You know that TPA, why keep gaslighting?

Rollingpinofdoom · 16/09/2026 20:10

TransParentlyAnnoyed · 16/09/2026 19:19

She calls trans women fetishists, and spreads harmful myths about trans children (notably, about how many have had surgery - apparently ignorant of the fact that the vast majority of 'gender affirming' surgeries are done on cis boys).

She's never apologised to Lin yu-ting for calling her a man who likes hitting women.

She ridiculed asexual people as 'not fancying a shag' and not actually existing. Despite the long history of asexual women being attacked for 'corrective rape' (apologies for the horrible term).

There are so many examples of her being shitty to minorities.

The protests at fully-clothed trans women having jobs. Taking selfies. Wearing clothes. Being online.

The doxxing of trans women and the ridiculing of their appearance.

Calling trans men autistic, mentally ill survivors (Jesus Christ how can you not see how ignorant that is).

Taking the piss out of trans women's appearance. Posting a Metro article in which a nb person wrote about their experience of being a new parent and taking the piss out of them.

She is neither trans, a parent of someone trans not a doctor, yet she writes constantly about who trans people are, how they should behave and why she thinks they exist. It's so weird.

That's no queen.

Rowling had one big opportunity to stick up for women - by not hiring Johnny Depp - and she blew it.

She defended the casting of a domestic abuser, gave him authority over women on the set of a film, helped him out financially and - when asked to reconsider by DV activists - refused to back down. She did this after he was judged a domestic abuser.

Defender of women, my arse.

Yeah yeah. We get it. You think she’s the devil incarnate. What she’s done is sooooooo much worse than all the death threats, rape threats, violence, piss protests and nastiness women have had to endure from the TRA. I mean, how dare she!!! She didn’t realise if you want to win hearts and minds, threats, breaking windows and throwing piss everywhere is the way to go.

So if you’re criticising her for not being trans but writing about who trans people are, you’ll be just as critical of TIM who write about what women are right, seeing as they are not women?

helderste · 16/09/2026 19:48

Seriestwo · 16/09/2026 18:52

You can do that? I assumed it was like Spotify, if it goes so do all the things I bought.

If you bought them through ravelry you can download and then save/ print the pdfs from your library or from the pattern page click the ‘in my library’ link in the top right corner and it’ll offer you a download (when you access the pattern to knit or crochet it, that’s the pdf and you can save it to all your devices or computers as many times as you want).

Edit: oh just realised you’re probably talking about the photos! I expect you can save them from the upload photo page on the project? Edit 2: yes, just did it 👍

TransParentlyAnnoyed · 16/09/2026 19:19

She calls trans women fetishists, and spreads harmful myths about trans children (notably, about how many have had surgery - apparently ignorant of the fact that the vast majority of 'gender affirming' surgeries are done on cis boys).

She's never apologised to Lin yu-ting for calling her a man who likes hitting women.

She ridiculed asexual people as 'not fancying a shag' and not actually existing. Despite the long history of asexual women being attacked for 'corrective rape' (apologies for the horrible term).

There are so many examples of her being shitty to minorities.

The protests at fully-clothed trans women having jobs. Taking selfies. Wearing clothes. Being online.

The doxxing of trans women and the ridiculing of their appearance.

Calling trans men autistic, mentally ill survivors (Jesus Christ how can you not see how ignorant that is).

Taking the piss out of trans women's appearance. Posting a Metro article in which a nb person wrote about their experience of being a new parent and taking the piss out of them.

She is neither trans, a parent of someone trans not a doctor, yet she writes constantly about who trans people are, how they should behave and why she thinks they exist. It's so weird.

That's no queen.

Rowling had one big opportunity to stick up for women - by not hiring Johnny Depp - and she blew it.

She defended the casting of a domestic abuser, gave him authority over women on the set of a film, helped him out financially and - when asked to reconsider by DV activists - refused to back down. She did this after he was judged a domestic abuser.

Defender of women, my arse.

RapidOnsetGenderCritic · 16/09/2026 18:54

AFigureWalks · 16/09/2026 09:18

Here, here.

There there.