Healthiest and Unhealthiest relationships in songs?

I sing and listen to a lot of folk songs and I've always felt the man in many traditional songs has a nerve, after being away for so long he's unrecognisable, to test the girl out as to whether she has been faithful and is still waiting for him! Then they marry and live happily ever after. I'd tell him to take a running jump myself....

And, also by Fascinating Aïda, Don't Come Back

Fascinating Aïda, The Image of Judy.

Lennon later rued this song - but they all do that, don't they - describing I think as a 'horror' in his Yoko days.
It's sort of a disappointing finale to an album that has songs like 'The Word', 'Nowhere Man', 'Michelle', 'Norwegion Wood', 'Girl' and 'In My Life'. It's also the last Beatle album however where the final song is a throwback tune that could have been on the first album, perhaps a way of reassuring ticket-buying fans that they'd still be getting the Beatlemania experience. See also how Dizzy Miss Lizzy follows Yesterday on the Help! album. With the next one, Revolver, and thereon, they would end with some musical anomaly or freak-out.

Yes I was about to post Run for Your Life. Can’t get much more clearly unhealthy than that lyric

I am really glad to have passed it on to even one person who enjoyed it! One of those things that stays in the back of my mind, so that sometimes I or someone else who knows it will say "no good will come of it" about some proposed action, or mutter about Doleful Ghosts, and the other will grin.

Grab a copy; that website seems to come and go a bit. Last year I couldn't find it, and I swear that the first time I saw it the format was quite different.

That is wonderful. I have many happy memories of listening to folk music in the car with DS when he was younger who would occasionally shout "no! Don't go the the merry green broom, are you mad?!" and suchlike at the cd.

P.J Harvey's 'Angelene' is desperately sad

My first name Angelene
Prettiest mess you've ever seen
Love for money is my sin
Any man calls, I'll let him in
Rose is my color, and white
Pretty mouth and green my eyes
I see men come and go
But there'll be one who will collect my soul and come to me
Two-thousand miles away
He walks upon the coast
Two-thousand miles away
It lays open like a road
Dear God, life ain't kind
People getting born and dying
But I've heard there's joy untold
Lays on that open road in front of me
My first name is Angelene

P.J Harvey's 'bunny boiler' song 'Rid Of Me'

Tie yourself to me
No one else, no
You're not rid of me, mmm
You're not rid of me
Night and day I breathe
Hah-hah, ay, hey
You're not rid of me
Yeah, you're not rid of me
Yeah, you're not rid of me
Yeah, you're not rid of me
I beg you, my darling
Don't leave me, I'm hurting
(Lick my legs, I'm on fire)
(Lick my legs, of desire)
I'll tie your legs
Keep you against my chest
Oh, you're not rid of me
Yeah, you're not rid of me
I'll make you lick my injuries
I'm gonna twist your head off, see
'Til you say don't you wish you never never met her
Don't you don't you wish you never never met her
Don't you don't you wish you never never met her
Don't you don't you wish you never never met her
I beg you, my darling
Don't leave me, I'm hurting
I've been lonely
Above everything
Above every day
I'm hurting
Yeah, you're not rid of me
Yeah, you're not rid of me
I'll make you lick my injuries
I'm gonna twist your head off, see
'Til you say don't you wish you never never met her
Don't you don't you wish you never never met her
Don't you don't you wish you never never met her
Don't you don't you wish you never never met her
Don't you don't you wish you never never met her
Don't you don't you wish you never never met her
Don't you don't you wish you never never met her
Don't you don't you wish you never never met her
Don't you don't you wish you never never met her
Don't you don't you wish you never never met her
Don't you don't you wish you never never met her
Don't you don't you wish you never never met her
(Lick my legs, I'm on fire)
(Lick my legs, of desire)
(Lick my legs, I'm on fire)
(Lick my legs, of desire)

On the other hand the lyrics to 'You Have Been Loved' and 'Jesus to a Child ' are beautiful. Nobody sings a ballad better than George did.

There is a very fine website thingy about the lessons the author culled from English folksongs.

https://www.nielsenhayden.com/makinglight/folksongs_are_y/#006448

I especially like
"Avoid navigable waterways. Don’t let yourself be talked into going down by the wild rippling water, the wan water, the salt sea shore, the strand, the lowlands low, the Burning Thames, and any area where the grass grows green on the banks of the great North Sea. Cliffs overlooking navigable waterways aren’t safe either."

I really do suggest that reading the whole thing may make you laugh, even on a Wednesday.

The doomed lover is Little Musgrave in Moore's version but it has to be the same guy. Castle Barnard is the ancestral home of Dominican Cummings ....gawd help us
Still causing trouble 😆

Marty Groves. I’ve seen various versions of the “noble lord” name.

It must have been a trend because “Hey Joe”, “Frankie and Johnny” and “Delilah” are much the same. I wonder why some women on Mumsnet don’t apply same logic with their errant men.

I think the one that always hits me hardest is the simplest. Most songs about bad relationships, violence, or murder attempt some sort of mitigation. Justice, remorse, or at least the perpetrator or victim trying to justify themselves or their attacker. Or they're cartoonish rather than serious. Or they have a distractingly catchy tune.

Behind the wall doesn't give anywhere to hide. Brutal simplicity.

Last night I heard the screaming
Loud voices behind the wall
Another sleepless night for me
It won't do no good to call
The police
Always come late
If they come at all

Last night I heard the screaming
Loud voices behind the wall
Another sleepless night for me
It won't do no good to call
The police
Always come late
If they come at all

And when they arrive
They say they can't interfere
With domestic affairs
Between a man and his wife
And as they walk out the door
The tears well up in her eyes

Last night I heard the screaming
Then a silence that chilled my soul
I prayed that I was dreaming
When I saw the ambulance in the road
And the policeman said
"I'm here to keep the peace
Will the crowd disperse
I think we all could use some sleep"

Last night I heard the screaming
Loud voices behind the wall
Another sleepless night for me
It won't do no good to call
The police
Always come late
If they come at all

Lord Barnard in Christy Moore's version. But I think it's the same tragic song ?

Lord Darnell he jumped up,
and loudly he did bawl,
He struck his wife right through the heart,
and pinned her against the wall.

"A grave, a grave!" Lord Darnell cried,
"to put these lovers in.
But bury my lady at the top,
for she was of noble kin."

Fairport Convention’s version of a nice English traditional

Black Velvet Band doesn't go well, either. Nor does Whiskey in the Jar.

That reminds me - from the Country and Western canon - Brad Paisley, Whiskey Lullaby. Doesn't end well. Featuring Alison Krauss for extra sparkle

I see Rod's Maggie May has been listed as an unhealthy one, but it's perhaps still marginally better than the other Maggie May, about a prostitute who steals a punter's clothes and wallet and gets transported. Although it might be pushing it to describe that as a 'relationship'.

Black Velvet Band doesn't go well, either. Nor does Whiskey in the Jar.

Tracy Chapman's Fast Car is a disaster of a relationship. Ella Fitzgerald's Black Coffee is deeply depressing.

And the Carpenters' Only Just Begun is lovely, but even that loses a little shine when you learn it was written for a bank advert.

I may have to retreat to the optimism of It's De-lovely.

Tom Paxton has some lovely ones about all sorts of relationships - friends, his children, his father, family in general, and this one for his wife:

"Dance In The Kitchen"

I love the candle light, I love the soft violin
I love the dark corner table, the bottle of wine
But when I'm holding you, just when the music begins
Honestly darling the kitchen will suit me just fine

Dance in the kitchen honey, dance to the radio
Right across the kitchen floor that's what they make 'em for
We'll dance again like we used to dance when love was new
Come on and dance in the kitchen honey, I wanna slow dance with you

Isn't it strange just a couple of minutes ago
I was all down in the mouth about all my affairs
Then two things happened when I switched on this radio
This song began and sweet darling you came down the stairs

Dance in the kitchen honey, dance to the radio
Right across the kitchen floor that's what they make 'em for
We'll dance again like we used to dance when love was new
Come on and dance in the kitchen honey, I wanna slow dance with you

Stay Another Day by E17 is allegedly about the brother of the guy who wrote it, who took his own life RIP.
If that's true, it looks like he used the tradition format of a pop song with kissing and handholding, which is a bit odd but I suppose pop songs are very format-driven.

David Bowie's Oh You Pretty Things is also about his brother [half-brother] who had mental health problems and also took his own life RIP.
Look out my window, what do I see?
Crack in the sky and a hand reaching down to me
All the nightmares came today
And it looks as though they're here to stay.

Bowie had the genius to ignore the pop-song clichés, E17 not so much...

Long thead but my singing group sings "Torn" and now I can't listen to it anymore.

My mum pointed out that there are a lot of songs about "I don't suppose one last shag is out of the question?"
One more night - Phil Collins
Stay another day - East 17
Before you leave me - Alex Warren
There are probably more...

I love Pulp, but lots of the songs are just filthy, but somehow ok!

Kiss with a fist by Florence and The Machine is horrendous.

And it seems like quite a lot of Kate Nash’s songs are about a deeply dysfunctional relationship. I hope it wasn’t all written from life…

Nooooo 😢 Mind you, I didn’t know he wrote it for his wife in the first place!

Yup, not a fan of this song.