I think part of the problem is the way these discussions get framed. When you start with “Trans women are real women and should have access to women’s spaces”, you’re not actually asking a question, you’re presenting a conclusion and expecting everyone to agree with it.
For me, the more useful conversation is: how do we make sure everyone is included and everyone is safe? That’s a very different starting point.
There are lots of practical solutions that don’t require redefining womanhood or removing boundaries that exist for safeguarding reasons. Things like unisex single‑occupancy toilets, individual changing cubicles, mixed‑gender facilities alongside women‑only ones, clear safeguarding policies that apply to all users
These options include trans people without removing the spaces that many women rely on for privacy, dignity, and safety. It doesn’t have to be framed as “all or nothing”, or “you’re either inclusive or you’re not”.
The current framing forces people into ideological corners. A more constructive approach is looking at practical design and policy that meets everyone’s needs without erasing anyone’s boundaries.
Single sex sporting events and such like are more complicated but a lot of the issues people are arguing about are easily solvable in the long-term if we are of a mind to make it happen. And lets face it, as a woman, I object to large queues for the women's toilets and there never are for men, so unisex cubicles would be a big improvement for us ladies (whether dressed as ladies from birth or not).