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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

M&S Colchester claim mixed changing is ‘completely safe’ for women.

460 replies

PeachOctopus · 27/05/2026 12:31

How is it that M&S can continue to flaunt the high court ruling and do not offer single sex changing rooms?

Abouterf in this video confronts the store manager and is fobbed off and told that it’s head offices policy:

Colchester @marksandspencer I asked where the women’s changing room was to try on swimwear. Manager Andrew (he/ his /him) says gender neutral changing areas are “completely safe” for women and girls. For asking him this question, he told me to leave the store.

Abouterf x account

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thedramaQueen · 03/06/2026 16:06

Easytoconfuse · 03/06/2026 15:53

Why should women have to pay to be treated with respect?

I’m not saying that women should.

Charities often take up causes when they think the law needs to be challenged or is being abused/ broken.

I thought that was one of the main functions of sex matters maybe I’m wrong here. If it is then why haven’t they done so yet?

Easytoconfuse · 03/06/2026 15:58

FairCat · 02/06/2026 00:27

Another day, another MN thread linked on X to reinforce the message that people on here are batshit. Good work.

The video that sets out to discredit M&S is a ridiculous own-goal. Everyone can see it's contrived nonsense staged to whip up division. The joke is that almost everyone goes to M&S and knows that their facilities are fine.

For the majority, who don't waste their lives obsessing about changing rooms and toilets, the sympathy is firmly with the poor retail worker who was undeservedly splattered across social media and doxxed. Imagine going to work tomorrow and having that happen to you.

He's not breaking the law. He's enacting company policy and there's nothing in the SC judgement that obliges M&S to do anything more than they are doing. Nothing.

The SC judgement will spell the end of single sex facilities, no business is going to risk prosecution by instructing staff to police them as demanded by the absurd EHRC code. Retail staff can't even intervene if someone is blatantly shoplifting, they certainly can't be expected to challenge women for not looking feminine enough, and it is women who will get the worst of it.

If the hysteria continues, ordinary women who are too old or too tall or too athletic or have short hair or are not white enough, will routinely experience fear and intimidation. Is emboldening gender vigilantes the route to a safer world for women? Really?

Almost everyone goes to Marks and Spencers - their profits say otherwise

People on MN are bat-shit - your opinion. You're entitled to it. Luckily, most of us here are too polite to tell us our opinion of you.

I could pick apart everything else you've said just as easily but you won't hear anything you don't want to. You're just here to tell us all how wrong we are and how mean and nasty we are compared to paragons of perfection like you.

Easytoconfuse · 03/06/2026 15:53

thedramaQueen · 01/06/2026 16:04

I was talking in general terms. But there is no doubt by sharing this on social media this has resulted in publicly shaming the member of staff and may have for all we know resulted in him being bullied as his details have been revealed publicly. All of that should be illegal.

If groups like sex matters are so convinced that the law has been broken by M&S let them put their money where their mouth is and take them to court.

Edited

Why should women have to pay to be treated with respect?

Easytoconfuse · 03/06/2026 15:52

thedramaQueen · 01/06/2026 16:04

I was talking in general terms. But there is no doubt by sharing this on social media this has resulted in publicly shaming the member of staff and may have for all we know resulted in him being bullied as his details have been revealed publicly. All of that should be illegal.

If groups like sex matters are so convinced that the law has been broken by M&S let them put their money where their mouth is and take them to court.

Edited

But we don't know that he's been bullied, do we?I'm sure M&S would have mentioned it because it'd fit their agenda so nicely.

thedramaQueen · 03/06/2026 12:47

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Can you please point to my horrible views. Thank you

thedramaQueen · 03/06/2026 12:42

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

I wasn’t but never mind. I feel sorry for you that you feel the need to be rude about a complete stranger.

As for my punctuation I’m dyslexic. Come on have a go at me for that too!

RedToothBrush · 03/06/2026 12:41

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Mmmnotsure · 03/06/2026 12:37

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It’s unclear how you want that read. Punctuation would help.

RedToothBrush · 03/06/2026 12:37

But you probably know this already.

RedToothBrush · 03/06/2026 12:36

thedramaQueen · 03/06/2026 09:13

Interesting you don’t mention being concerned about private sector or foreign companies/ governments being involved identity card schemes…

That wasn't my point. And I've always been firmly anti-id cards. I wasn't getting into a debate about whether we should have ID cards. My point was about the slurs we receive and it was about any ID that we do get (whether I want it or not) is actually accurate rather than gas lighting nonsense that ignores women's consent and women's privacy and dignity.

thedramaQueen · 03/06/2026 10:01

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Mmmnotsure · 03/06/2026 09:36

thedramaQueen · 03/06/2026 09:13

Interesting you don’t mention being concerned about private sector or foreign companies/ governments being involved identity card schemes…

You may not have liked it being pointed out that your approach could be seen to be allied with the far right, but saying that every post has to mention every aspect is just a version of whataboutery.

thedramaQueen · 03/06/2026 09:13

Interesting you don’t mention being concerned about private sector or foreign companies/ governments being involved identity card schemes…

thedramaQueen · 03/06/2026 09:11

RedToothBrush · 03/06/2026 08:44

How far right of you to be anti-id cards and anti-immigration...

See how this goes?

Personally I am not for ID cards, but I do think ID should reflect sex and I do think that yes if appropriate there should be a challenge scheme like for alcohol.

hahaha that’s made me laugh this morning. I’m usually called looney lefty so for you to suggest I’m far right is interesting

RedToothBrush · 03/06/2026 08:45

Mainly because you can pretty much tell 99% of the time if it's a man or a woman anyway and that's kinda the point.

RedToothBrush · 03/06/2026 08:44

thedramaQueen · 03/06/2026 08:41

No thanks I don’t feel confident that our government would protect our civil liberties. I do not trust our government at all with any kind of identity card scheme… it would probably be outsourced to some foreign private company with friends in the government. Not for me!

How far right of you to be anti-id cards and anti-immigration...

See how this goes?

Personally I am not for ID cards, but I do think ID should reflect sex and I do think that yes if appropriate there should be a challenge scheme like for alcohol.

thedramaQueen · 03/06/2026 08:41

RedToothBrush · 03/06/2026 08:11

Why not? The government wants us to all have identity cards.

No thanks I don’t feel confident that our government would protect our civil liberties. I do not trust our government at all with any kind of identity card scheme… it would probably be outsourced to some foreign private company with friends in the government. Not for me!

RedToothBrush · 03/06/2026 08:11

thedramaQueen · 01/06/2026 22:12

And trans men going into the ladies… that would be interesting someone would no doubt scream look there is a man in here! Are you going to get people to carry around identifying cards so you check their sex at birth… seriously this is silly

Why not? The government wants us to all have identity cards.

Mmmnotsure · 02/06/2026 16:47

@FairCat
The joke is that almost everyone goes to M&S and knows that their facilities are fine.

Lots of people go to M&S. I'm not so sure about the second bit. Or that it's a joke.

When WRN carry out their polls outside M&S, asking people about single sex changing rooms (spoiler, nearly everyone says they want sss) the majority of people haven't realised that M&S changing rooms are not single sex. It's been done by stealth. Turns out that numerous women haven't noticed the signage changes, or realised that Fitting Rooms means mixed sex. But it's in the bra section, they say...

As Mole At The Door has it, it's not misogyny, it's M&SOGNY.

ChamonixMountainBum · 02/06/2026 16:27

thedramaQueen · 01/06/2026 22:12

And trans men going into the ladies… that would be interesting someone would no doubt scream look there is a man in here! Are you going to get people to carry around identifying cards so you check their sex at birth… seriously this is silly

The short stature, kazoo voices and bum fluff whispy beards are usually a give away.

MyLuckyHelper · 02/06/2026 09:44

Womanofcustard · 01/06/2026 16:02

To all those ‘uncomfortable’ with a shop worker being videoed -
HE WAS THE MANAGER OF THE STORE!

so what? THE MANAGER OF THE STORE doesn't create company policies.

KnottyAuty · 02/06/2026 08:39

thedramaQueen · 01/06/2026 22:06

What happened to this member of staff was out of order and the fact you are determined to excuse this behaviour says a lot about you.

You’re being patronising and I’m not particularly interested in reading anymore massive assumptions about me. It’s getting exhausting and frankly boring so carrying on believing that this was acceptable. I just hope nobody ever behaves like this towards someone you care about.

Edited

What behaviour do you think I am excusing?

FairCat · 02/06/2026 00:27

Another day, another MN thread linked on X to reinforce the message that people on here are batshit. Good work.

The video that sets out to discredit M&S is a ridiculous own-goal. Everyone can see it's contrived nonsense staged to whip up division. The joke is that almost everyone goes to M&S and knows that their facilities are fine.

For the majority, who don't waste their lives obsessing about changing rooms and toilets, the sympathy is firmly with the poor retail worker who was undeservedly splattered across social media and doxxed. Imagine going to work tomorrow and having that happen to you.

He's not breaking the law. He's enacting company policy and there's nothing in the SC judgement that obliges M&S to do anything more than they are doing. Nothing.

The SC judgement will spell the end of single sex facilities, no business is going to risk prosecution by instructing staff to police them as demanded by the absurd EHRC code. Retail staff can't even intervene if someone is blatantly shoplifting, they certainly can't be expected to challenge women for not looking feminine enough, and it is women who will get the worst of it.

If the hysteria continues, ordinary women who are too old or too tall or too athletic or have short hair or are not white enough, will routinely experience fear and intimidation. Is emboldening gender vigilantes the route to a safer world for women? Really?

Datun · 01/06/2026 23:09

thedramaQueen · 01/06/2026 22:12

And trans men going into the ladies… that would be interesting someone would no doubt scream look there is a man in here! Are you going to get people to carry around identifying cards so you check their sex at birth… seriously this is silly

Oh my God, these people who can't tell men from women. Dating must take you bloody ages.

If a transman passes so well she upsets the women in the space, the Supreme Court has said you can exclude her and offer her an alternative.

thedramaQueen · 01/06/2026 22:12

mindfulmoaning · 01/06/2026 22:06

Very good point

And trans men going into the ladies… that would be interesting someone would no doubt scream look there is a man in here! Are you going to get people to carry around identifying cards so you check their sex at birth… seriously this is silly