Still Asleep at the Wheel: A Further Examination of Gender and Safeguarding in Schools - Policy Exchange

I don't think its always as simple as that

Please can you explain how you would do this, especially where you don't believe it's safe to tell the parents that their child is gender questioning.

Edited to add that my question relates to you saying that the following is pretty much your line of thinking: Just don't let children socially transition at school. Then there is no concern about whether to tell the parents or not.

If the school has good reason to believe that a child's parents are or might be homophobic and the child says something that leads staff to believe they are potentially gay/bi, then yes, this child may be at risk at home. This should be managed as a safeguarding issue, where the parents may be a risk to the child. Regardless, there is no immediate reason why a school would need to tell parents that a child is exploring their sexual orientation because it's not risky to do so. Being gay or bi isn't harmful.

But a child being gender questioning is a different matter entirely. Unfortunately, if the parents are homophobic, the parents may want to "trans away the gay", by helping them to identify as the opposite sex and "become straight". However, they should still be informed that their child is gender questioning and the school should make it very clear that being gender questioning is completely different from being gay. Not to pander to the homophobia but to highlight the risk that their child is vulnerable to becoming locked in to an identity that could lead to permanent harm (e.g. believing that in future they will need to take irreversible medication or remove body parts). If the parents can't understand this difference, they will need help to do so. A referral to Children's Services may well be appropriate, depending on the reaction and attitude of the parents.

Staying quiet is a safeguarding failure.

Either you think the parents are safe, in which case you must tell them, or you think the parents are a danger to the child, in which case you must tell social services.

There is no case in which a school is qualified to make any decisions on behalf of a child, especially with regard to something with potential physical and psychological consequences as serious as declaring a trans identity. Even Cass, with her many caveats, made this clear.

This is a great way of laying it out. My opinion as follows:

Yes, 8 is way too late. By this point, it's highly likely that the child has locked onto an inevitable pathway towards medical transition.

If staff overheard 1, a note should be made on the safeguarding system (e.g. CPOMS) that the child is at risk of becoming gender questioning. If that happens again, another note should be made. If there is a pattern of it continuing to happen, as evidenced by these CPOMS entries (e.g. 3 occasions), parents should be informed. Ideally, the KCSIE guidance would tell schools to point parents to the Cass Report. Critically, schools should not position gender identity as fact when discussing this with parents. Instead they should say that some people believe we all have a gender identity. They could tell parents that the Cass Report supports the position that gender identity is real but that it also highlights risks associated with it.

If staff overheard 2, parents should immediately be informed and directed towards the Cass Report as above (and obviously a CPOMS note made).

Thankfully, my daughter spoke to her dad and me somewhere between 1 and 2. She got as far as thinking she might be trans and wanted puberty blockers to buy time to figure everything out. We listened and thought that request sounded reasonable based on what she told us. I then did lots of research, found the interim Cass Report and we eventually navigated a support pathway for her. It wasn't easy. Had she not spoken to us herself, and had the school told us after point 2, I firmly believe that this support journey would have been a lot harder because it would have been even more difficult (than it was) to stop multiple professionals pulling her towards social transition.

I think staying quiet and not telling the parents might be a better decision in some cases.

In which case, who then has the parental responsibility for what's happening? The legal responsibility.

Or do you just think parents should be cut out of the picture all together? And the child simply left dangling with no legal, parental responsibility in their lives?

I don't think it is that different because the same sort of attitudes can mean the child is at risk purely because they've gotten pregnant.

I agree with the rest. Though I think that secondary school.age children should hsve private changing facilities full stop. I was amazed to see that the guidelines say children up to 11 can be in a mixed changing environment. Thankfully, that wasnt the case for us at all past the juniors and when we went swimming, it was in a public pool and we could all have our own room within the single sex changing rooms.

Same for all of my kids.

This. If there is that much danger from parents, this should be reported to social services.

I think staying quiet and not telling the parents might be a better decision in some cases.

Backgrounds where culture and/or religion encourage pretty extreme and even illegal consequences for failure to adhere to rules governing sex and sexuality. This is definitely more of a problem in some cultures than others.

The child would be at risk because of their questioning. Before that, they wouldn't necessarily be at increased risk, just perhaps from a background where things like homophobia aremore prevalent.

Schools maybe are the number one place where the twin failures of suicidal empathy and kindness at all costs are both most likely to happen.
Gender distressed kids must be protected at all costs, kindness the only attitude to demonstrate.
Of course, those other kids most put at a disadvantage/at risk by this are totally ignored, they must also show total empathy with those other kids, kindness towards to those other kids now in very short supply.
Proving that talk of empathy and kindness is just that, talk.

That's likely because kids from thkse backgrounds

Please could you clarify what backgrounds you're referring to here?

safe or at least free.

Safe or at least free from what?

If a child is at risk of being pulled towards irreversible physical harm, parents should be informed.

If the school believed that the child was at risk from the parents, prior to the child exploring the idea of gender identity, this should already have been reported in to Children's Services. If there had been no prior concerns that the parents were a risk to the child, the parents should be told the moment an adult at school becomes aware that the child is considering the idea of social transition.

Yes.
It's worth remembering that Looked after Children (ie those in care of the state) do terribly in terms of all life measures. Academically, work related, more likely to be homeless and all other measures. As a result there's a major focus on these children which is why we're so clear about the damning data.

It seems a form of thoughtless cruelty, repeatedly promoting "parental alienation" and secret keeping in the face of what we know about how seriously children are affected when estranged at a young age. In my experience, responsible professionals work hard to help parents and children maintain their relationship and overcome the challenges, only intervening via safeguarding and the courts to break the parent child relationship in the face of abuse.

I think I agree, point 3/4 is basically social transition, their friends are around these kids far more than any school teacher.

So if a child is socially transitioning themselves, it's a possible symptom of other issues given how often this coincides with things like poor mental health and/or neurodivergence.

This point should probably be made in response to the KCSIE consultation which closes on Wednesday.

What sort of attitude is that for an adult to have when it comes to helping children develop. Is this the "It'll be alright on the night "parenting style or something.

You can't stop people from self diagnosing.
You can if you give the right sort of help at the right time, talking things over with a child is a good start, helping them see things from a different perspective so they have more information to go on than what little information they might be basing there self diagnoses on.

You can't disallow someone from believing that they have or are something.
You can point out what the believe is a complete fantasy, and help them find something more solid and real to believe in.

You can only hope they see things differently in time.
Or a parent could see it as a cry for help and take steps to help their child with figuring out what going on because that's what parents do.

Teacher should be bringing such things to the parents attention so they can do just that, not stay quite and 'hope they see things differently in time'.

We’re not talking about abortion though - that’s an entirely different conversation.

Re self diagnosis, if you mean that schools should ignore it in terms of how they treat the student then I agree (the safeguarding issue around mental health or radicalisation by trans ideology is slightly different).

So no announcements to the class that Jonny is now Julie, no wrong sex pronouns, and correct toilets and changing for their sex to be used.

No it’s not. This thread is talking about what should happen and what is right but may not be happening yet.

That's beside the point. We are talking about how things happen, not how they should happen.

I dont think it's safe for all parents to know certain things about their children for a range of reasons. For instance, I dont think it's always safe for a teenage girl to disclose a termination to her parents. I think there is nuance with these things.

You can't stop people from self diagnosing. You can't disallow someone from believing that they have or are something. Sure you can refuse to use what pronouns they want or refuse to call them a boy, but you can't control their self diagnosis. You can only hope they see things differently in time.

I would want to be told at point 3/4

At what point should parents be informed?

1. Child is overheard discussing with friends that they're not happy with their sex

2. Child is overheard discussing with friends that they think that they're trans

3. Friends heard referred to child with different name

4. Friends heard referring to child with different pronouns

5. Child discloses to teacher that they think they may be trans

6. Child discloses to teacher that they are trans

7. Child requests that teacher uses different name/pronouns

8. Child requests that the school changes their name and pronouns

The updated KCSIE guidelines would put the point of parents being informed at 8. Is this too late?

‘Trans’ is an adult concept that needs to be taken very seriously for the individual.

There should be no ‘trans’ for children, social or otherwise, as they are not capable of making such a life changing decision. Support for kids with distress around their body or sex, yes.

Any form of ‘transition’ - no.