Singer Ethel Cain exposes genitals on Instagram

I’m now thinking Hyacinth Bucket type decor. Or is it more what you’d think would appeal to Mavis from Coronation Street?

These men are so pathetic. They just want to get their c&ck and balls out, and flash people. Instead of a dirty trench, they use tired florals.

As soon as you see the words 'genitals' and 'exposed' in the same sentence it is blindingly obvious we're talking about a man.

Yes, a lot of my metalhead friends have gone for the full shave after decades of having long hair for just that reason. They were sick of the assumptions. Madness.

Western society seems to be going through a period of self-imposed memory loss when it comes to the existence of sex(ist) stereotypes and the fact that 30-40 years ago we weren't as sexist about dress and behaviour.

I know men who are metalheads and they've been asked if they use female pronouns, the reason given being the fact they they have long hair?!🤯🙄

The colour pink used to be for boys.

Men used to wear high heels, makeup and big wigs.

It seems like we're losing a lot of truth and indeed history to the obfustication of gender ideology.

his behaviour sounds to me like leaning into porn, not femininity.

This ⬆️

If you Google "sissy tasks Reddit" there are lots of subgroups dedicated to challenges associated with leaning into feminity. Googling "sissy tasks" (without Reddit) brings up lots of books on Amazon. I would be amazed if there wasn't a task suggestion along the lines of "get a photo of yourself published with your genitals secretly on show".

It's interesting that Cain's fanbase seems to be largely young girls and that it took time for the Instagram photo to have age restrictions applied.

His audience appear to be in the main teenage girls and young women.

I'm really sorry for being so flippant but I've just remembered a popular song from my teenage years: "The Streak" : Ethel! You git your clothes on!

Wouldn’t his arsehole have had more appeal to his audience?

Or that high heels were originally menswear

Don't tell them about Christening gowns...

Yes, I was told my views are extreme by a mum whose daughter is autistic. The mum didn't actually know what any of my views were other than a) it's important not to conflate autism-related puberty distress with gender identity and b) schools should follow current statutory safeguarding guidance to recognise that being LGB is different from being gender questioning from a safeguarding risk perspective. This was as far as we got on the subject before she declared my views to be extreme and not in line with the majority of the population.

At the time of the conversation, my daughter had apparently upset her daughter (who she told me is a trans ally, and feels very strongly about this) by questioning whether it was possible for a female (who identifies as a boy and is attracted to boys) to be a gay boy. My comment to the mum was that it seemed like a reasonable question, particularly so when you consider that gay boys may not feel comfortable accepting biological females within gay male dating circles. I didn't offer any "view" on it other than that.

She told me that I would have to get used to the idea that my daughter would be exposed to views that differed from mine when she goes to college (I agreed) and the conversation then pretty much ground to a halt.

I'm still not entirely sure which of my views was the extreme one. I think it's far more likely that she projected her own version of my views onto me. TBF to her, I now refer to her as "TRA-mum" when recounting this experience... so touché 🙃

I will never be forced to call my rapist a woman. And yet, if he decided to identify as female tomorrow, that’s what would be expected of me if we go down the preferred pronouns route.

the word is no.

"It's confusing for children like my daughter"

It sends children conflicting and confusing messaging from adults who should know fucking better. If adults model this acceptance of language changes and the acceptance of this type of pornified behaviour, it reinforces it and actively lowers the children's personal boundaries.

And as many of us know, it has been done through usage of words such as 'kind', 'respect', 'tolerant' and 'brave'. But it is in no way a 'harmless' decision to make.

But back to the thread topic....

It's also incredibly unhelpful that we're expected to refer to some males who show their genitals as women.

It's confusing for children like my daughter (e.g. autistic children or younger children who are trying to make sense of the world and their place within it) and it's an autogynophilic paradise for those that get a thrill from it.

I was told by one of the parents who was a medical practitioner herself and had done a huge amount of reading and discussing it with clinicians etc, that it is unhelpful for other adults to affirm the gender identity thinking it was kind and the best approach was avoiding using affirming language and to treat the name change as being a nickname. I was told the very same thing by another of the mothers. She told me just how hard it was to maintain a neutral approach when well meaning adults used affirming language and how ingrained it had now become in her daughter because of that language usage.

This ⬆️⬆️⬆️

My daughter didn't get as far as actively identifying as a boy (or non-binary) but every time someone asked her her pronouns, generally out of kindness, I could see that she moved a little closer to doing so. On one occasion when she was asked, when she was actively gender questioning, she said she wasn't sure but was leaning towards he/him.

She still gets mistaken for a boy now, because of her short hair, height and clothing choice. She still uses a nickname that sounds neutral, although she uses a different one (that sounds female) at home. I've lost count of the number of times that I still need to say to well-meaning adults that it's unhelpful conflating her lack of "gender conformity" with gender identity. That it's just a nickname etc. When I mention that autism can lead to discomfort with puberty, and that conflating this with gender identity adds confusion, this does tend to open up the conversation in a positive way. I've only been told by a couple of people (so far) that my views are awful.

When people do ask her her pronouns, she tends to say "I don't mind"... which almost always seems to lead to people saying "they". Again, I have found myself having to find an opportunity to say, without my daughter there (i.e. from a safeguarding perspective) that "they" suggests that she is neither a boy or a girl and that this too is also unhelpful. Thankfully, as she has got older, she is starting to feel clearer on what it means to be male and female.

So, while this man wants people to use female language for him, we still have girls and young women encouraged to use the term 'front hole'!

Language is important.

100%. Yes.

I think one could argue that males in positions of power and influence have long used this to abuse trust and push boundaries - look at David Bowie, John Peel, Donald Trump, many, many footballers.

But a bald, naked dick pic would, I think, generally be pulled or at least censored by Insta?

I wish there were more ways to teach young women red flags, and how to spot them. But unfortunately predators and abusers know very well to exploit young women's (natural and expected) rejection of older women's knowledge and experience.

I think the added larger issue is that some people don't recognise it as a form of predatory behaviour when this is put on social media the way it was.

Agreeing to disagree seems reasonable here if we're at an impasse on suicide rates. Perhaps we're not though?

My view aligns with the information provided in this government review:

https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/review-of-suicides-and-gender-dysphoria-at-the-tavistock-and-portman-nhs-foundation-trust/review-of-suicides-and-gender-dysphoria-at-the-tavistock-and-portman-nhs-foundation-trust-independent-report

The report recognises that there are multiple risk factors associated with children who experience gender dysphoria and urges caution in attributing a cause. Would you agree with this?

When it comes to children I know and children I don't know, I will take the same approach: I will use no pronouns at all. This is because I won't be a part of locking them into a social transition (even if their parents support it), because I recognise that this puts them at risk of locking onto a pathway that will lead to medical transition, but I also want to avoid causing the child further distress.

Unfortunately, for some children and parents, my pronoun avoidance won't be enough. My opinion is that any child who is given an expectation that others must always use their preferred pronouns (e.g. to show allyship) risks becoming even more upset if this doesn't happen, as they are likely to believe that anyone who doesn't actively affirm their identity wishes them harm.

In truth, it's highly unlikely likely that anyone avoiding pronouns (or using sex-based pronouns) wishes that child harm. It is far more likely that they recognise why it's important that the child understands that it's impossible to change sex, no matter how they identify.

This is the mess associated with telling children, and adults, that the only way to be respectful and kind is to use preferred pronouns.

Male.musicians being abusive, predatory pricks is nothing new.

I think the larger issue here is actually Instagram refusing to censor the image.

yep!

An audience full of teenage girls who may have been taught by their schools and their peers and by adults that someone can change sex / that it is to be celebrated to reject your sex / that it is acceptable to demand that people treat you as if you are not the sex that you materially are.

A 28 year.old man with an audience that is majority teenage girls/young women.

@TeenLifeMum You do realise that for some of these men, it's a turn on for them getting women to call them 'she'? Have a look at AGP.

Yeah. I'm not going to do that.

Cain's audience, I understand, is largely female and skews young. He will be aware of this.

https://www.reddit.com/r/Ethelcain/comments/1niwci9/surprised_by_how_many_teens_were_in_the_audience/

So who is he broadcasting an unfiltered, uncensored penis to? He knows who will be looking.