Enby they/them pronouns - what's the law on this?

Whether you feel ‘the need’ or not is irrelevant. We were talking about common usage of ‘their’ as a singular pronoun (and as a linguist you’re no doubt aware of its long use in that way) together with a plural form the verb. ‘They have’, ‘they are’ etc. I’m just amused by the constant denial that it is ever used that way and, if it were, no one could understand what was going on.

I see no need, in your hypothetical example, to use any pronoun for the absent receptionist at all: the words "no, I haven't" seem to me to do the job perfectly well. Or, as I suggested, "No, not since I came in".

Avoiding the hypersensitivities of those who persist in finding offence in things no reasonable person would worry about is something of an art-form, or a game – probably at the expense of the hypersensitive ones, but I can't help how they choose to spend their lives, and the chances are they will never know about it anyway, since by definition "they/them/he/she/it/ver/vim/vigour" are only intended to be used in their absence.

So you’re saying that if you didn’t know the sex of an individual (the doctor, the receptionist, the nurse) you wouldn’t say “they have”? Ok. A lot of people would and do.

How do the rules you may have been taught at primary school go?

I am
You are
He she or it is
We are
You are
They are.

It follows that "they has" would not be right, but a fad-construction. "They have" is correct but "they" is not singular, it's plural, so I would avoid using it about a single individual.

Thus I would say of an individual either "she has" or "he has". If the person has irritated me enough I might say "it has", but do bear in mind that I wouldn't need to do so in that person's presence, because in that case "you have" would apply (in both singular and plural).

Knock off the drama llama routine. It's not our fault that you've decided to limit your intellectual range to "agrees with me" & "hates".

As the old saying goes, if someone wants to pretend they're the opposite sex, that's up to them, if they want us to pretend they're the opposite sex, that's up to us.

As for "non-binary", that has no status in law & means nothing other than, "pretends to be special".

How about “no they haven’t” referring to one person? Or are you another one who has never said that? (Maybe read and understand the whole reply)

Out in the real world I would simply say "no" or "no, I haven't".

If I really felt obliged to add a time scale, I'd say "no, not since I came in" and maybe even add "five minutes ago".

(I have never in my life said "they hasn't" any more than i have ever said "she have", and I am not going to start now; but then, I am a linguist and I dislike torturing the language to pander to a fad.)

I’m not particularly disputing the way in which it is most commonly used. It’s the constant insistence by some posters that it’s absolutely never used as a singular pronoun and, further, if someone did use it as a singular pronoun not one person would understand what was being said. I’ll be honest, I can’t get particularly het up about the use of gender neutral pronouns, but even if I could I wouldn’t be making up spurious arguments about them.

Me too and for say oh dear never mind about it 🤣🤣 i wonder if this one will stay up

Knowing that mammals come in two sexes and that they can't change sex is simply understanding the reality of mammals. As is understanding that Humans are mammals.

Trying to shame or force people into pretending that humans can change sex (or that an individual has no sex) is forcing an unreasonable belief on others.

I don't mind if someone wants to identify as the opposite sex or as non binary - but this is an identity and not physical reality.

I honestly think that all these accusations of bigotry from TRAs is projection. They want to inflict their unreasonable beliefs on the non-believers.

It's that old question that all authoritarian regimes have to answer - what are you going to do with the people who disagree? We know the answer for the gender believers, and it is not to accept that people can have a plurality of views. Only total acquiescence will do.

It's totalitarian in its demands.

It is quite right that someone can ask another person to not call them something that they don't like, it is another thing to demand specific language (especially when it is most likely to be used when the individual isn't present). I don't think that we should be rude to others and in the workplace, people should be professional in their conduct. This goes for the people with identities and those without.

However, forced speech is a step too far. It is double plus bad.

My choice of words is my own. Send me to 101 or the Gulag. I won't obey.

This got deleted. I’m not sure why.

”Hi. My name is 莲花 and I’m your new colleague. If you misspell or mispronounce my name that’s evidence your racist attitude towards me and I’m going to complain to an Employment Tribunal about your harassment.”

“Where is the doctor (singular)?”
”They aren’t here yet”

That is correct English when the sex of the doctor is unknown.

If Dr Brown is male & the speaker knows Dr Brown's sex then the exchange would be

"Where is Dr Brown"
"He isn't here yet"

If Dr Brown is male & the speaker does not know Dr Brown's sex then the exchange would be

"Where is Dr Brown"
"They aren't here yet"

Unfortunately it's that last Japanese soldier still fighting the war because they cannot admit that they have colluded in the mutilation & irreversible damage to their child for no good reason at all.

Yes the ‘has’ should be a ‘have’, which I think is what you mean. The same would be true if the sentence has been “The singular pronouns ‘she’, ‘her’ and ‘hers’ have been used for centuries” so I’m not sure why you think that error was relevant.

Surprised to find yet another person who claims to have never encountered exchanges such as

“Where is the doctor (singular)?”
”They aren’t here yet”

The use of enby for non binary really winds me up, I must be getting old.

Where did I say that people who identify as trans and non-binary don't exist? Of course they exist, which is why we're having this discussion. Stating the fact that they haven't changed sex or ceased to have a sex isn't denying their existence, it's simply stating a scientific fact, which is also a belief protected by law.

Nobody is targeting anyone. Not complying with the belief systems of other people isn't 'bullying'. We have the right not to believe that people can change sex or cease to have a sex.

I'm happy to leave people who believe in sex changes and gender identity alone. But are they happy to leave me alone and respect my beliefs? It seems not. Why is the respect only supposed to go in one direction?

Not believing in gender identity or sex changes isn't a conspiracy against anyone. Calling us transphobes and believing we are all malicious and trying to harm people who identify as trans and non-binary is conspiratorial thinking. Leaving us alone and just getting on with your own life really is an option.

Just stop trying to compel our speech to comply with your beliefs.

And treating them as a malicious collective is conspiratorial thinking.

Oh, what irony there is in that ^ statement!

Leaving them alone and just getting on with your own life really is an option.

I totally agree. But only if it works both ways. If this group of trans-identifying men could keep out of women's stuff that'd be great. Most men do manage it. Why can't they?

"I don't hate trans people , they're just part of a harmful quasi religious death cult" lol

Well, I was going to apologise for being rubbish at using the reply.& quote system here, because I did reply to the wrong person, but you're clearly so full of hatred I shall simply back away before the explosion.

OP, just to add: please do express your views in the workplace. Your colleagues will be happier without you.

Hate poisons the soul. Collective hate against a minority even more so.

I shall get lost.

While I will (eventually, I hope) improve my internet skills, you'll all still be here mad that trans people exist. I guess you'll all keep creating more fake panics of the "Oh no! One is in my workplace, how can I maliciously disrespect them and get away with it, please advise!" kind.

Any of you who can't envision your life without this hate, please get out now. understand what you are doing to yourselves. None of this is helping you. And it won't make trans people go away either.

Bye.

Oh, please. Trans and non-binary people just exist, and arguing that you don't want to respect their existence is not going to make them go away.

Holding transphobic views is one thing, but targeting work colleagues because you don't like the minority they belong to is bullying. It's the definition of prejudice.

Trans and non-binary people aren't a conspiracy against anyone, they're just people. And treating them as a malicious collective is conspiratorial thinking. Leaving them alone and just getting on with your own life really is an option.

Nope, trans people are completely normal human beings.

The trope of a hyper-sexual woman whose entire existence is defined by their hunger for sex, is from porn. It's been used against minority women forever.

Trans people get up each.morning, take the kids to school, make toast and go to work just like anyone else. They have mortgages, pay rent, and but Mother's Day cards.

I'm sorry for what hate has done to you, and hope things improve. Unless you're a bot, in which case I hope you get less boring programming instructions in future. Beep boop.