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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Enby they/them pronouns - what's the law on this?

390 replies

SirChenjins · 03/03/2026 10:08

New person coming into my team who I think may want others to use they/them. I have a standard team signature that I don't want altered, but if my suspicions are correct and she starts bringing her whole enby self to work, where do we stand legally if I or anyone else says nope, not doing that?

I know the moral arguments on each side of the debate so don't want a rehash of the for's and against's, just want to know where I stand in law .

OP posts:
godmum56 · 03/03/2026 16:08

Everlil · 03/03/2026 11:36

Intentionally not using someone’s correct pronouns can be seen as a form of harassment in UK workplaces. Using ‘they’ in place of she or he is grammatically correct, so calling someone ‘they’ rather than ‘she’s is completely acceptable, but if you’ve stated you don’t want to be called ‘they’, you want to be ‘she’ and a person keeps calling you ‘they’, it could be seen as harassment (and the other way around).

But, is this ever going to happen? Personally I hate being called she, I prefer people to use my name when I’m in their company as I think it’s very rude. When I’m not there, they can call me she/he/they/banana - I don’t really care. I usually refer to people I don’t know the name of as ‘they’ anyway. I don’t think you need to make this into a drama preemptively, it might never be an issue.

Edited

this.

spannasaurus · 03/03/2026 15:59

Rhubarbandcustardd · 03/03/2026 15:56

Refusing to use chosen pronouns is harassment

Any case law to back that up

Ereshkigalangcleg · 03/03/2026 15:58

Rhubarbandcustardd · 03/03/2026 15:54

Because they are not - they can fall within philosophical beliefs which then cannot be used to harass others - you need to get more familiar with equality law

definitely not how people like to wrongly shout “protected by law protected by law” - as if they are mentioned specifically

most certainly not

Edited

Whether correct sex pronouns are “harassment” objectively and how reasonable it is to expect people to use preferred pronouns at all times is dependent on the individual circumstances of a case. Gender critical belief is protected in law as a philosophical belief. The devil is in the detail. It certainly isn’t the case that if people are offended by the expression of that belief that means it’s automatically harassment.

spannasaurus · 03/03/2026 15:58

Rhubarbandcustardd · 03/03/2026 15:54

Because they are not - they can fall within philosophical beliefs which then cannot be used to harass others - you need to get more familiar with equality law

definitely not how people like to wrongly shout “protected by law protected by law” - as if they are mentioned specifically

most certainly not

Edited

Religion and belief is a protected characteristic in the same way that sexual orientation, race etc are protected characteristics and offer the same protection against discrimination.

No protected characteristic can be used as a defence against harassment

WandaSiri · 03/03/2026 15:58

@SirChenjins

You're wise to try and establish the legal position and a good boss for trying to take into account the beliefs and preferences of all your team. I personally think that the stance you say you will be taking on pronouns - the newbie can ask, but no-one is obliged to agree - is a sensible compromise. I would strongly advise looking at the Sex Matters website or the Legal Feminist blog for actual legal advice, though - don't try and parse judgements yourself, and above all, don't rely on legal advice from non-lawyers.

OpheliaWitchoftheWoods · 03/03/2026 15:57

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

Rhubarbandcustardd · 03/03/2026 15:56

spannasaurus · 03/03/2026 15:54

You're assuming that refusing to use pronouns is harassment and ignoring that compelling the speech of others may also be harassment

Refusing to use chosen pronouns is harassment

spannasaurus · 03/03/2026 15:54

Rhubarbandcustardd · 03/03/2026 15:51

I’m totally aware - you can believe what you like but it CANNOT be used to harass others - of which it would be if you refuse to use pronouns and cause harm

You're assuming that refusing to use pronouns is harassment and ignoring that compelling the speech of others may also be harassment

Ereshkigalangcleg · 03/03/2026 15:54

As in it’s a huge reach for that man to be described as “non binary” and it’s possible because the term “non binary” is basically whatever anyone wants it to mean to suit their purpose at the time.

Rhubarbandcustardd · 03/03/2026 15:54

spannasaurus · 03/03/2026 15:46

Why do you believe that GC beliefs are not protected by law? They are a protected characteristic for the purposes of the Equality Act

Because they are not - they can fall within philosophical beliefs which then cannot be used to harass others - you need to get more familiar with equality law

definitely not how people like to wrongly shout “protected by law protected by law” - as if they are mentioned specifically

most certainly not

BackToLurk · 03/03/2026 15:53

Anyway, there's a whole other thread on here that will tell you that words are just words so just chill the fuck out. Or something.

OpheliaWitchoftheWoods · 03/03/2026 15:52

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

spannasaurus · 03/03/2026 15:52

There was a recent legal case (may have been GLP) that stated Taylor vs Jaguar was no longer valid following the judgment in FWS

Rhubarbandcustardd · 03/03/2026 15:51

SirChenjins · 03/03/2026 15:40

And as you'll no doubt be aware, philosophical belief is a protected characteristic.

I’m totally aware - you can believe what you like but it CANNOT be used to harass others - of which it would be if you refuse to use pronouns and cause harm

BackToLurk · 03/03/2026 15:51

lllamaDrama · 03/03/2026 15:45

”Jane told me to set up the meeting. I asked Jane who to invite and Jane told me to invite the whole team, Jane added that Jane wants to do the introduction and Jane also suggested that Jane could field the questions at the end. I don’t think Jane has done this before so it’s good to see Jane stepping up to the plate.”

”Did Jane particularly ask if she could take questions just on Jane’s own?”

“Yes that’s exactly what Jane said. I was surprised Jane wanted to but Jane was completely sure! I think we can trust Jane to do the job.”

”Jane told me to set up the meeting. I asked who to invite and was told to invite the whole team. Jane wants to do the introduction and also field the questions at the end. I don’t think Jane has done this before, but it's good to see someone stepping up to the plate like this.”

Really not that difficult. (Although most people would probably just throw a couple of 'theys' or 'thems' in without having the vapours)

Ereshkigalangcleg · 03/03/2026 15:49

MyAmpleSheep · 03/03/2026 13:57

With a bit of research, I see that what I said earlier may not be correct. The only case I can find isTaylor v Jaguar Land Rover, an ET decision from 2020 in which a non-binary identity was said to engage the protected characteristic of GR.

You can read the decision here:

https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/5fc8d559d3bf7f7f5c134ad3/MsRTaylorvJaguarLandRoverLimited-1304471.2018-Reasons.pdf

Judgment here:
https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/5f68b2ebe90e077f5ac3bb5a/Ms_R_Taylor_V_Jaguar_Land_Rover_Ltd_-1304471_2018-_judgment.pdf

"The claimant has the protected characteristic of gender reassignment."

Edited

He wasn’t “non binary” he was a bog standard TIM. That’s why he called himself Rose and used she/her. “Non binary” gender identity in terms of people who don’t think they have a “gender” was never intended to be included within “gender reassignment”. There have been many threads here discussing this case in detail.

lllamaDrama · 03/03/2026 15:46

It sounds almost as weird as using plural pronouns when it should be singular but no one can take offence.

spannasaurus · 03/03/2026 15:46

Rhubarbandcustardd · 03/03/2026 15:41

This is a common misconception and wrongly interpreted all the time

gender critical beliefs are in no way protected by law - huge misconception

you will need to adhere to what person wants - it’s not up to you and your team to decide what you will and won’t do

if you don’t it’s harassment - as shown above

Why do you believe that GC beliefs are not protected by law? They are a protected characteristic for the purposes of the Equality Act

lllamaDrama · 03/03/2026 15:45

”Jane told me to set up the meeting. I asked Jane who to invite and Jane told me to invite the whole team, Jane added that Jane wants to do the introduction and Jane also suggested that Jane could field the questions at the end. I don’t think Jane has done this before so it’s good to see Jane stepping up to the plate.”

”Did Jane particularly ask if she could take questions just on Jane’s own?”

“Yes that’s exactly what Jane said. I was surprised Jane wanted to but Jane was completely sure! I think we can trust Jane to do the job.”

SirChenjins · 03/03/2026 15:44

lllamaDrama · 03/03/2026 15:41

You will have to instruct anyone in your team with a problem to completely avoid using pronouns. Ludicrous but legally acceptable.

Yes, this seems like the best solution I think. I'm sure this will be acceptable on both sides, should the issue arise.

OP posts:
tutugogo · 03/03/2026 15:44

Refusing to make a very minor alteration to a group signature sounds very petty but all comes down to what. i refuse to but pronouns on my personal work email signature as it’s obvious im female.

lllamaDrama · 03/03/2026 15:41

You will have to instruct anyone in your team with a problem to completely avoid using pronouns. Ludicrous but legally acceptable.

Rhubarbandcustardd · 03/03/2026 15:41

SirChenjins · 03/03/2026 15:38

GC beliefs are protected in law - but from what I've gleaned on here, the use of pronouns are not covered by law. Remember grievances can also be raised by staff who feel their rights philosophical beliefs are not being upheld - which, as I've said, is why I want to make sure everyone is aware of their rights and no-one feels excluded. There will be a compromise that will suit everyone - staff could use avoid they/them and use her name for example, which seems reasonable.

This is a common misconception and wrongly interpreted all the time

gender critical beliefs are in no way protected by law - huge misconception

you will need to adhere to what person wants - it’s not up to you and your team to decide what you will and won’t do

if you don’t it’s harassment - as shown above

SirChenjins · 03/03/2026 15:40

Rhubarbandcustardd · 03/03/2026 15:37

You will have someone in your team feeling excluded if you carry on

Inclusion means people with protected characteristics are included not people who are already in positions of power sociologically

you have taken a “side” and are assuming your team will be uncomfortable whereas it’s you that are uncomfortable

why don’t you just give it a whirl - you might learn something

And as you'll no doubt be aware, philosophical belief is a protected characteristic.

OP posts:
SirChenjins · 03/03/2026 15:38

Ohyeahitsme · 03/03/2026 15:29

Yes, what I'm saying is that grievances can be brought against things which aren't covered explicitly by a law. So whilst legally the employee cannot compel colleagues to use preferred pronouns, they could bring grievances against them, and win. This could potentially result in a company policy around use of preferred pronouns, because conversely, there is no law which protects gender critical beliefs and refusal to use pronouns. The law is neither your friend nor your enemy in this situation!

GC beliefs are protected in law - but from what I've gleaned on here, the use of pronouns are not covered by law. Remember grievances can also be raised by staff who feel their rights philosophical beliefs are not being upheld - which, as I've said, is why I want to make sure everyone is aware of their rights and no-one feels excluded. There will be a compromise that will suit everyone - staff could use avoid they/them and use her name for example, which seems reasonable.

OP posts:
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