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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Has anyone left their spouse over GC views / pro-Islam stance

336 replies

PinkTreeFrog · 25/12/2025 13:47

Husband and I could never find common ground on gender critical views and his blindness to the harms of Islam to women. He has an inability to take in information that contradicts his world view. Has anyone left a spouse over this?

OP posts:
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polid · 25/12/2025 17:36

being critical of Islam/the wearing of a niquab/hijab etc isn’t islamophobic. It’s almost impossible to have this discussion, especially with the hard left ,without being accused of islamophobia. Calling someone islamophobic carries the same weight as being called transphobic these days. Ie. it’s utterly meaningless. It’s a protected space. You can criticise christianity or hinduism as much as you like, but woe betide the person who takes issue with islam.

Judgejudysno1fan · 25/12/2025 17:34

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Get a grip, love. Im muslim and we dont call women who dnt wear hijab haram, come on. Its important in our faith yes, but doesn't mean that because my non Muslim family and friends dont wear then I then think they're utter scum.

Women have rights in islam.and men and women are equal.
Women were given the right to vote 1400 years avo and great Britain only allowed the women of this country to vote only what 80/90 years ago because we didn't have the same brain to vote as a man and we're arrested for wanting to vote

Whatever pigs in Afghanistan or wherever view woman as less and prohibit them from getting a job or education has nothing to do with the rest of us. They are slimeballs and thats a fact.

BoxesBoxesEverywhere · 25/12/2025 17:34

ThePeachHiker · 25/12/2025 15:10

I’m from a 50/50 family in a Northern city where there is a large Islamic community. I find it really sad that is how you view us. Our community is generally 3rd/4th generation immigrants. Most men here don’t care about head coverings and certainly wouldn’t consider women who don’t wear a covering haram. Do you ever spend time with Muslims or are you just making assumptions?
what is a sanctuary city?

OP doesn't speak for all of us, I just see people when I see women wearing hijabs, they cover their hair, I don't. I don't automatically think that they must be being forced either.
Also no idea what a sanctuary city is 😕

Guavafish1 · 25/12/2025 17:33

You sound Islamophobia

DoggyDilemma25 · 25/12/2025 17:28

I think the OP is getting a raw deal here. Personally I see a difference between Islam (the religion) and Islamism (the political ideology) But also, in terms of women, a Christian woman can stop being a Christian. You can’t say that for all faiths. It would mean death for some women.

OP I couldn’t be with someone gullible enough to swallow all the current ‘trendy’ ideology without questioning it.

LidlAmaretto · 25/12/2025 17:26

PinkTreeFrog · 25/12/2025 14:14

More information: I am gender critical, he is deep in the red/green alliance / pro-Palestine activism. We live in a sanctuary city in an area where hijabs are everywhere. I have a difficult time explaining it to our daughter in a balanced way.

I am in this position. I dont engage. I wouldn't divorce over this but I would if he tried to force his views on me. He's a member of the Green Party ( for Palestine etc issues, not particularly deep into environmentalist) not bothered about gender issues . I have said I'd never vote Green because of this. He hasnt pushed it because I think he just doesn't care enough about it. It does chip away though when someone is so deeply entrenched in this stuff when you have different views.

LeftieRightsHoarder · 25/12/2025 17:24

I agree with OP. I couldn’t live with a misogynist or someone who condoned misogyny.

I’m more leftwing than DH, who is more of a liberal. But I had nothing against liberals until they all lost the plot and started spouting TWAW.

Even more perplexingly, my former leftie comrades have largely gone the same way. (Why? How can you espouse socialism while supporting such an antisocial creed? How can you call for collective action while supporting individuals who insist that society has to centre their personal demands?)

Luckily my DH recognises biological reality and supports women’s rights. I suspect a lot of my friends are cautious about challenging the trans creed, or Islamism, because their children would be shocked.

Frogbear · 25/12/2025 17:17

PinkTreeFrog · 25/12/2025 17:04

Your neighbors form the social fabric. They are friends, potential partners, teachers, voters. Of course it matters what values they hold. I just want to ensure they are not anti-female.

Well I live in a community with a high Jewish population. Many of my neighbours wear head coverings and the girls from a young age are dressed in long skirts and long sleeved tops. They might live their lives by misogynistic rules but we still chit chat and we still look out for each other (and I note you still say nothing about how you feel about Jewish men).

Their different faith and way of life does not affect me and we can still be neighbourly.

Looks like the issue isn’t your Muslim neighbours but rather you deciding you know what your neighbours believe just because someone wears the hijab.

panachronic · 25/12/2025 17:12

PinkTreeFrog · 25/12/2025 15:09

When I see the covered women in our neighborhood I am deeply concerned and do make generalizations about boys/men raised in a religion that promotes and often enforces this. If their family members must wear hijab, how do they feel about my daughter wearing her normal western attire?

They don't care.

Holluschickie · 25/12/2025 17:05

PinkTreeFrog · 25/12/2025 16:53

Why is her daughter getting an abortion? Who is standing in her way? Where is the father of the child?

You misunderstand.
Her daughter isn't getting an abortion this very moment or even pregnant. but as she's in a red state, if she did get pregnant, abortion is illegal except in certain circumstances. My point was that there are plenty of people of every religion who hate women too. And certainly in the US, evangelical Christians are way more powerful.

PinkTreeFrog · 25/12/2025 17:04

friendlylurker · 25/12/2025 16:31

Its not ironic, its the truth. She's getting worked up over imaginary scenarios and generalising the people who live in her neighborhood.

Like I said, people have more going on in their brains than what their neighbors wear or do not wear.

Your neighbors form the social fabric. They are friends, potential partners, teachers, voters. Of course it matters what values they hold. I just want to ensure they are not anti-female.

OP posts:
PinkTreeFrog · 25/12/2025 16:55

Screamingabdabz · 25/12/2025 16:04

You’re right of course it’s ‘just’ a piece of cloth and yet men of the same faith are not compelled to cover themselves. Why one rule for women? I think we know the answer. And it’s not about piety or scripture or holy writ. It’s about unholy misogynistic ideas of why women are expected to present as ‘modest’.

Op - leave him. Any male who thinks women are ‘less’ cannot be reconciled or reasonable.

Thank you for that. I plan to serve the divorce papers. It's just unfortunate.

OP posts:
PinkTreeFrog · 25/12/2025 16:54

friendlylurker · 25/12/2025 16:23

As a muslim hijabi woman (who like all muslims has relatives who do not wear hijab) this thread is hilarious. Don't worry, none of the boys in your neighborhood want your darling daughter or have time to think about any of your heads.

You are the one assuming we hold prejudices when nobody gives a toss about your hair.

May I ask why you wear the hijab and your thoughts on women who don't?

OP posts:
PinkTreeFrog · 25/12/2025 16:53

Holluschickie · 25/12/2025 16:12

My sister lives in the US and currently it's old white men with 'western values' standing in the way of her daughter getting an abortion, not women in hijabs.

Why is her daughter getting an abortion? Who is standing in her way? Where is the father of the child?

OP posts:
PinkTreeFrog · 25/12/2025 16:50

Frogbear · 25/12/2025 15:39

I don’t think OP will be coming back to this thread. She’s started a new one but this time removed any reference to Islam, I suspect probably because she can’t answer why she doesn’t like all Muslim men and only Muslim men.

No - it is because the question is about leaving a spouse for having views that I find harmful to women. This thread has become sidetracked by the Islam issue, which can take days and pages to unpack fully.

OP posts:
friendlylurker · 25/12/2025 16:32

And your lumping in of palestine here- yeah, okay. Nice try babes.

friendlylurker · 25/12/2025 16:31

soupyspoon · 25/12/2025 16:27

This seems an ironic post

Why would none of the boys in OPs neighbour 'want' her daughter? Why not?

Its not ironic, its the truth. She's getting worked up over imaginary scenarios and generalising the people who live in her neighborhood.

Like I said, people have more going on in their brains than what their neighbors wear or do not wear.

Bringemout · 25/12/2025 16:30

I would struggle with someone who couldn’t understand my fears for women and what the leads to in terms of my stance on religion or culture. I would think they are ignorant and disinterested.

Frogbear · 25/12/2025 16:28

It’s also unclear to me why being pro-Palestine is taken as being pro-Islam. You can be against the indiscriminate killing of people regardless of what faith they are.

soupyspoon · 25/12/2025 16:27

friendlylurker · 25/12/2025 16:23

As a muslim hijabi woman (who like all muslims has relatives who do not wear hijab) this thread is hilarious. Don't worry, none of the boys in your neighborhood want your darling daughter or have time to think about any of your heads.

You are the one assuming we hold prejudices when nobody gives a toss about your hair.

This seems an ironic post

Why would none of the boys in OPs neighbour 'want' her daughter? Why not?

friendlylurker · 25/12/2025 16:23

As a muslim hijabi woman (who like all muslims has relatives who do not wear hijab) this thread is hilarious. Don't worry, none of the boys in your neighborhood want your darling daughter or have time to think about any of your heads.

You are the one assuming we hold prejudices when nobody gives a toss about your hair.

RedTagAlan · 25/12/2025 16:12

soupyspoon · 25/12/2025 16:08

I dont agree because OP seems to be asking specifically about misogynistic views within a cultural setting in which she lives rather than a political system itself. So it makes no odds where in the world that is.

Fair enough. I do think it is worth seeking more info though, about more general politics or single issue.

Holluschickie · 25/12/2025 16:12

My sister lives in the US and currently it's old white men with 'western values' standing in the way of her daughter getting an abortion, not women in hijabs.

soupyspoon · 25/12/2025 16:08

RedTagAlan · 25/12/2025 15:58

I think it does, and I have said why on the other thread.

Because UK politics have more overlap than in the US. Labour and the Tories still share core policies. The NHS for example. The US don't. There is a much bigger gap between US progressives than with MAGA. Pretty much no overlap at all.

So while I can see a UK Labour/Tory couple managing fine, I am not so sure about the same in the US.

Do you see what I mean ? And do you agree ?

I dont agree because OP seems to be asking specifically about misogynistic views within a cultural setting in which she lives rather than a political system itself. So it makes no odds where in the world that is.

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