Please or to access all these features

Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

"Supporting trans colleagues through this difficult time."

154 replies

StopTheHyperbole · 03/12/2025 21:59

So I've NC for this, I'm a fairly regular poster on this board, but I've been pushed to start this thread as I am just in despair at the hyperbolic statements certain people at my place of work are spouting. Ugh!!!!

Anyway, so, I work in the public sector, there was a big gathering of opinions on the workplace, all invited to chat, round tables, discussions etc. Key questions being: what can we do to improve? How do we do things well? What do you think about our organisation? Etc. It's a yearly thing that's gone on for at least 20 years.

One of the colleagues on another table (everyone asked to write down then summarise discussions) said the company could "do more to help support trans colleagues during this extremely difficult time." Silence round the room and then when asked to clarify, they said "due to the supreme court decision."

I had to physically stop myself from sighing out loud as I was right in the eye line of the person who said this. A young, fairly grumpy they/them (actual female though) from a different team. It's just such utter UTTER bullshit. No one challenged this view, a few people NODDED!!! ARGH, it's just so frustrating.

What difficult time? Nothing is difficult??? The court decision just clarified equality law, why the need for this hyperbole? Nobody is banned from anything, this over-dramatic language about a law being clarified to ensure that single sex spaces are respected in certain circumstances is just...nuts.

Anyway I'm venting, but it worries me it's so prevalent at my work, when we should be neutral to activist causes (as a public sector organisation) and it clearly isn't the case. I wish I'd been braver in challenging this arrogant, grumpy young person but I didn't. And I slightly hate myself for it, but I have kids, mortgage and bills to pay. I just can't rock the boat. HR and the internal equality team are very much on board with it all unfortunately.

OP posts:
StopTheHyperbole · 03/12/2025 22:14

Councilworker · 03/12/2025 22:01

Ive been invited to three training sessions on Trans/NB issues this week. Lucky me. Oh wait it's two. The first one if for the T and Nb only so they can set the agenda for the training.

Oh you'll need your poker face for that one then! Good luck!!!

OP posts:
Wbeezer · 03/12/2025 22:12

I have female friends in public sector jobs like health and education who used to be more sceptical but I think they trained themselves to stick to the party line in public so well that you can’t have a meaningful discussion with them anymore, they just won’t engage. They don’t have any confidence in their own instincts or thoughts anymore and just want to avoid saying the “wrong” thing and being seen as a fuddy duddy or a bigot. There’s a lot of cognitive dissonance going on…
i have much more robust conversations about gender with male friends in the pub.

Realityisreal · 03/12/2025 22:09

I tend to question further to bring a bit of sunlight into the room and also to not to appear to blindly agree, something along the lines of, 'oh, I've seen something about the case, I thought it was about securing safe space for women who may have previously experienced violence against them to ensure they aren't intimidated out of spaces, I know VAWG is, at last, a hot topic, was that the case?'
Not overly subtle but raises an example of women's exclusion while not being something that can be taken as openly hostile nor easily dismissed either!

Councilworker · 03/12/2025 22:01

Ive been invited to three training sessions on Trans/NB issues this week. Lucky me. Oh wait it's two. The first one if for the T and Nb only so they can set the agenda for the training.

Swipe left for the next trending thread