Page 19 | Another breastfeeding one

MisssCackle · 2025-09-16T18:04:59+00:00

Couldn’t see a thread on this. In the latest of Breastfeeding batshittery..‘Breastfeeding and Lactation Support UK’ have today posted this. I am so angered by it. The UK breastfeeding rates are amongst some of the lowest globally. We should be empowering women, not erasing them. Encouraging them to leave if they disagree?? They should be ashamed.

Honish · 16/09/2025 21:13

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RainbowStarr · 16/09/2025 21:12

KilkennyCats · 16/09/2025 19:54

So none of us can refer to ourselves as women or mothers to appease the tiny minority who think they aren’t (despite having just given birth)?
How does that make sense to you?

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You can call yourself whatever you like but the point is if a trans man or non binary

STMWBec · 16/09/2025 21:12

They can reach out without using the word Mamas the other group members aren't their mum's it's weird anyway for adults to refer to other adults based on their parental status. It's icky!

STMWBec · 16/09/2025 21:11

Very, yes!

Original poster

MisssCackle · 16/09/2025 21:09

CabbageMum · 16/09/2025 21:03

It’s more concerning that this is the conclusion you’ve come to over a group asking members to be inclusive.

There is no “expense of mothers and babies”.
The group runs a very tight ship, members are verified and no biological men, or unverifiable profiles are accepted.

Perhaps you should join and find that out before you throw wild accusations out.

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It wasn’t politely asking people to be inclusive. It was telling them to be, or get out.

As a moderator of ‘8 years’ surely you would understand how this would be alienating to a new mum who has dared to reach out to her fellow ‘mamas’?

OP posts:

netflixfan · 16/09/2025 21:08

STMWBec · 16/09/2025 21:06

I'm the group creator, my uni tutors are in my group. In fact I've just won a scholarship of excellence for the group and my amazing contributions to breastfeeding support. I've also been highly praised whilst on placement for my incredible knowledge and support with new parents.

Well you’re pleased with yourself aren’t you?

Honish · 16/09/2025 21:08

CabbageMum · 16/09/2025 21:03

It’s more concerning that this is the conclusion you’ve come to over a group asking members to be inclusive.

There is no “expense of mothers and babies”.
The group runs a very tight ship, members are verified and no biological men, or unverifiable profiles are accepted.

Perhaps you should join and find that out before you throw wild accusations out.

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I'm breastfeeding my 5th baby and have breastfed for 11 years in total, there's nothing they can teach me. But I remember some Facebook groups being a real support and a warm community when I had my first child in 2012 - luckily posts like the one screenshot upthread would have been unthinkable back then.

STMWBec · 16/09/2025 21:08

We are professionals they've came to the right place for feeding support.

netflixfan · 16/09/2025 21:07

In reality how many women who have transitioned to men, and have actually had a baby, exist?
Surely they could ask for sensitive personal help from a health professional, rather than a group?

Lavender14 · 16/09/2025 21:06

CabbageMum · 16/09/2025 21:03

It’s more concerning that this is the conclusion you’ve come to over a group asking members to be inclusive.

There is no “expense of mothers and babies”.
The group runs a very tight ship, members are verified and no biological men, or unverifiable profiles are accepted.

Perhaps you should join and find that out before you throw wild accusations out.

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I think this is where the guise of people being concerned about bf rates as opposed to actually being afraid of transwomen or non binary (biological men) really falls away on these posts when there are people prepared to scaremonger, spin the rumour mill and potentially derail a group that's probably been a source of support for many women.

STMWBec · 16/09/2025 21:06

I'm the group creator, my uni tutors are in my group. In fact I've just won a scholarship of excellence for the group and my amazing contributions to breastfeeding support. I've also been highly praised whilst on placement for my incredible knowledge and support with new parents.

Original poster

MisssCackle · 16/09/2025 21:05

STMWBec · 16/09/2025 21:00

Are you taking the piss hahaha? I've ran the group for 8 years pal. I've been trained for 7.5 of them. I've helped 100,000's of parents with feeding so yes I do those things daily! Constantly 🖕🏼

This can’t be real

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CabbageMum · 16/09/2025 21:03

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It’s more concerning that this is the conclusion you’ve come to over a group asking members to be inclusive.

There is no “expense of mothers and babies”.
The group runs a very tight ship, members are verified and no biological men, or unverifiable profiles are accepted.

Perhaps you should join and find that out before you throw wild accusations out.

STMWBec · 16/09/2025 21:02

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More fool you..the entire team is trained in Lactation support we give out the most factual, evidence based support you'll find. We vet every single member to ensure they are a lactation person of health care professionals who works with those who will need lactation support.

Lavender14 · 16/09/2025 21:02

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Do you class non binary people or trans men (both referring to biological females) as fantasists, perverse, deviants, voyeurs or are you reacting to this post based on your personal feelings around trans women? Do you not think that non binary people born female or trans men (born female) should be supported to breastfeed in a way that's accessible for them?

STMWBec · 16/09/2025 21:00

Are you taking the piss hahaha? I've ran the group for 8 years pal. I've been trained for 7.5 of them. I've helped 100,000's of parents with feeding so yes I do those things daily! Constantly 🖕🏼

Honish · 16/09/2025 20:58

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Original poster

MisssCackle · 16/09/2025 20:56

STMWBec · 16/09/2025 20:48

Which is why we're not just called breastfeeding were called breastfeeding AND lactation which covers all :) being inclusive isn't hard.

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Ah. You are the moderator aren’t you?

Completely unprofessional. I’d be referring to your codes of conduct and social media policy if I were you.

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Lavender14 · 16/09/2025 20:54

CabbageMum · 16/09/2025 20:43

You’re angered by being asked to use inclusive language?

and before you even start, where does it say you can’t refer to yourself as a woman.

it just means don’t walk into a room of people and say “hi ladies” and ignore the existence of others in the room who might not answer to it. Saying “hi all” requires absolutely nothing from you, yet it can make someone’s day so much better. Be kind as they say, but I guess that only applies to those you feel are worth of it?

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I agree and tbh as someone who does also run a bf support group for mums I think it really underestimates how difficult it is for admins who give up their free time to try and coordinate a group that's meeting the needs of lots of different individuals with different beliefs and backgrounds etc. Just adopting the approach that the majority rules isn't always fair because it means that whatever group is in the minority will always be shut out. You don't know what conversations admins have had with people in the group behind the scenes. Often they'll be trying to weigh things up with more information than the other members of the group will be privy to.

"There's that "inclusive"/"exclusionary" thing again. Not inclusive of anyone who believes that if you breastfeed you are a woman, whether you like it or not."
I think this is really only an issue if you can only exist in an echo chamber and struggle to deal with people who think differently to you. Obviously breastfeeding has very political undertones for loads of reasons but you equally can't expect all breastfeeding people to have hive mind.

CabbageMum · 16/09/2025 20:54

PrizedPickledPopcorn · 16/09/2025 19:51

So this makes sure transmen get lactation support. It’s totally contradictory, however I can see the logic.

A better solution would surely be to have FB groups aimed at transmen who are doing pregnancy and feeding, with lactation specialists and midwives supporting them.

So… segregate them? Because you don’t want them in the same group as you?

CabbageMum · 16/09/2025 20:53

Firealarm1414 · 16/09/2025 19:51

So, in the name of being "inclusive", they have to exclude 99.99% of breastfeeding women, who do see themselves as ladies and mamas? How does that make sense? Oh yeah, they dont give a shit about the erasure of women, and have chosen to pander to a tiny vocal minority. I hope loads of people leave the group.

Ohhhh Lordy. So wrong and so loud.

CabbageMum · 16/09/2025 20:50

DuesToTheDirt · 16/09/2025 19:38

There's that "inclusive"/"exclusionary" thing again. Not inclusive of anyone who believes that if you breastfeed you are a woman, whether you like it or not.

You’ve really missed the point.

Original poster

MisssCackle · 16/09/2025 20:50

STMWBec · 16/09/2025 20:42

And what have you personally done to help improve breastfeeding rates? Have you paid for training to help others? Have you started any online groups to voluntarily give accurate breastfeeding support? Do you volunteer your time at a local breastfeeding group each week? Or do you sit behind a computer screen doing F ALL whilst complaining about those who are actively supporting lactating people.

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Not that it is of any relevance but I have done some of those things, yes. Have you?

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CabbageMum · 16/09/2025 20:49

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STMWBec · 16/09/2025 20:48

wintergolds · 16/09/2025 20:14

Well, isn’t calling themselves ‘breastfeeding’ support exclusionary language?

Which is why we're not just called breastfeeding were called breastfeeding AND lactation which covers all :) being inclusive isn't hard.