Non-binary - what's that all about?

My 15 year old has started using 'they' to refer to everyone (including me!). I'm assuming it stems from a desire not to offend the 'special' people (of which my DD 19 has been one 🙄) but I find it very odd. I don't want to get into an argument with him about it though so I bite my tongue.

Which is itself a bit rich coming from someone who spends so much of their freetime seething and trolling MN. (see how easy this game is to play?)

It's a political identity.

Who exactly is “gatekeeping femininity” here. Men aren’t women because they are male. If they want to think of themselves as feminine men, that’s fine.

This.

As a woman, my female body (not just my genitals) is relevant to my everyday life.

And yet, you seem to want to go to great lengths to demonstrate how 'unimportant' your NB gender is to you.

As you say, referring to you as Mrs or a woman or 'she' is the default in English. So you must spend an awful lot of time and effort reminding people that you're not to be treated in the same default way as everyone else, because you're special and different.

Seems nonsensical to spend so much time and effort and headspace on something that is 'unimportant' to you.

I'm not trying to be arsey, you do you and if it makes you happy that's great. I just don't think your explanation of why you're doing it makes sense.

That's a bit rich coming from someone who spends so much of their freetime gatekeeping femininity on Mumsnet.
Nobody on MN is gatekeeping femininity, it's "female" many of us have strong opinions about.

That level of self absorption is definitely a feature.
Imagine assuming someone grabbing a takeaway coffee gives a shiny shite about your angst about your gender, whatever the hell that actually is (nobody’s ever been able to explain it).

The first cracks in GenZ and GenX’s support for ‘trans rights’ were showed through many young people insisting that non-binary was different to trans. Lots of them insisted they represented completely different phenomenon. When TRAs insisted that those with non binary were trans, many young people began to ask broader questions which led to ‘live and let live, but you talk crap’

Agree with many others saying it’s performative nonsense. I’ve long thought it’s something like ‘trans lite.’ No need for pesky hormones or surgery, just a social by in to the rainbow brigade.

You get to be part of the community, but when you grow up & get over yourself there’s no harm done, you can continue living your male or female life.

That's a bit rich coming from someone who spends so much of their freetime gatekeeping femininity on Mumsnet.

They/them is not at all confusing!!

Some of us can treat our female sex as irrelevant most of the time, because we are fortunate in our health and personal relationships, and because in our society the women who went before us fought against the odds for some semblance of equality with men.
Meanwhile women in some other societies, and less fortunate women in our own, still find that their sex is all too relevant, whether they like it or not. See for example the very distressing thread currently running on this board, about FGM.

I don't know about any of that, I was just commenting in how the use of pronouns has changed.

So basically, the reality of sexed bodies is becoming unmentionable in refined society, at a time when pornography is rife, men's rights activism is on the up and rape has practically been decriminalised because nearly every offender gets away with it.
"Pretend it isn't there and nobody will think about it any more". The Victorians tried that approach, and it didn't work. It especially didn't work for women.

Yes agree

It’s a made-up load of cobblers, perfect for people who are looking for an interesting angle or who are devoid of personality. I’m sure I’d have been taken in by it (and would probably identity as such) if I was young now. I’d only we could go back to punks/skins/goths/soul boys and girls etc etc

That seems to me to be an either incredibly privileged or very naive position.

If you think no one has ever made judgements about you or behaved in a certain way towards you because of your female biology or signalled whether or not your behaviour is sex appropriate then I feel confident saying you’re wrong. That doesn’t mean they should make judgements or change their behaviour, just that they do. If you think your biology hasn’t in anyway impacted choices you’ve made or how you’ve had to defend those choices, again I feel confident saying you’re wrong.

Some of this we need society to stop making assumptions about what women can and can’t do, but some of it society needs to change its approach due to our biological reality (see seatbelts, phone sizes, biomedical research and on and on).

So you’re a gender atheist like most of the other women on MN, but you want to be in the rainbow gang?

I think there are lots of gender non conforming men and women. Not conformity (refusing to fit prescribed social, cultural or legal roles etc) has driven change. To me NB seems very individualistic - I don’t fit so I’m stepping aside. Probably an easier route than trying to change things for everyone else.

Basically, it is a load of attention seeking prats who need some sort of validation!

I am female, but some days I wear pants, no makeup. Other days I wear a dress, full make up and look like im taking on vogues run way.

I am female, it is in my DNA. Can't change it!