What does your partner think?

Really thought this thread was going to be about the hatred I have for people who ignore what you've decided or assume choices are too complex for you and ask what your male partner thinks!

My DH and DCs are all sex realist, thank goodness. But DH does get a bit annoyed with me talking about it all the time

Mine is a sex realist. Like me. I couldn’t love him more when he expresses his disdain / disgust at men pretending to be women to get into women’s and girls’ spaces / sports / awards.
Present how you like, not anyone else’s business, but don’t expect to con the system or other people. Is what my husband thinks.

Lovely to hear and I’m sorry for your loss.

I’m so envious of those with partners who aren’t of the be kind twaw variety. I accept everyone has the right to their opinion, but it makes me sad (and angry if I’m honest). I’ve also had other people close to me telling me I’m a bigot and must be a trump supporter. I’m pretty left wing. I take great pleasure in making it known that my views seem to align with the morning star 😆

My partner (man) is even more militant than me about the matter. Pointed out and challenged so many errors in his employer's (local gov) policies confusing sex and gender that he has now been added as a member of the women's network(!) so that he can be included to preview materials before issue. He is slowly radicalising all of his friends and admitted he has been less productive than usual this week as he has had one eye on the sandie peggie trial. Probably helps he has 2 daughter's one of which is gay

Not true, we only have DS and DGS and my DH is fully on board with my GC view (although I love the Gender Atheist term from a PP 😀).
My DS do prove this point! One of my DS is a full on TRA and it’s the one subject we never discuss because he knows we’ll never agree.
The other just keeps quiet because he knows his DW and I will never agree (she went to school with a bloke who transed) and he doesn’t want to get caught in the cross fire! 🤣

DH was ahead of me. He is like @MrsTerryPratchett 's DH. He pointed out to me the problems when I was a staunch BeKinder (wasn't called that then but still existed), but I didn't really get it until I had children. Now we're completely on the same page.

this is scaryyyyy. Check his search history.

Exactly. It's an important case and yet it is hardly to never mentioned on any mainstream media. If you didn't go on particular social media you would not know. Had a mind-blowing conversation with step-son and his partner the other day (both GC but not great readers etc). DiL had visited Brighton and it came up that all the toilets (bar one) was unisex, which she did not like. Step-son remarked that Trump had thrown men out of women's sports so his solution would work in the UK. DiL commented 'bloody UK!' i.e. this rubbish is supported here, so I chipped in with SC ruling, Peggie and Darlington nurses cases and said that the UK is in the forefront of the struggle against this rubbish: Terf Island. They did not know, because it doesn't turn up in mainstream media nor in social media that most people go on - it's on MN, on bits of Twitter/X, on parts of substack and you need to go looking for it.
I was a bit appalled but, on thinking about it, not surprised. And this is why the whole trans agenda has got so far; most ordinary people haven't a clue about what has happened and the damage it has done.

omg I actually couldn't imagine my boyfriend disagreeing w me on this. You ladies with DHs who are very staunchly TWAW - If I were you I would honestly be checking his search history because for a straight married man with kids to be staunchly and passionately TWAW...well, that would make me think maybe he's questioning his own gender.

The misogynistic intent of his 'crying' is obvious - he wanted to contrast with Peggie who stood up and complained, so he put on the 'poor wee man who knows he's really a woman - see, she's made him cry' act.
The class/heirarchy aspect is obvious. He ranks higher than Peggie on both counts and has been supported in this by women like Isla Bumba (?) who doesn't know whether she is a woman or not. (Do a cheek swab, ducks, that will tell you instantly.)

DH is baffled that anyone would think TWAW, and is truly disgusted by the performative AGP male we sometimes have the misfortune to see around our locality, often to be seen doing a selfie photo shoot, or wearing floaty tennis skirts that just happen to get caught in the wind to show his frilly knickers.

I know the issue causes strong feelings on both sides, but I do not believe I could be married to anyone who thought otherwise.

DD thinks I’m a bigot and said she would be open to dating a trans person. She hadn’t actually met any in real life so I await the realisation of what that means.

It's not just to blame @donkey86 for her H's stupid beliefs nor staying with him if there are other factors in his favour. However, she should consider he is a safeguarding risk to their DDs if he thinks it is ok for a male to be in a female changing room exposing themselves. She should talk to him - not row - but point out that he is a safeguarding problem which means she cannot safely leave their DDs in his care especially in a setting where they may have to undress e.g. taking them swimming, gym etc.
Also, he gets agitated when she mentions GC beliefs so he knows, deep down, he is wrong. She should express her GC beliefs whenever the opportunities arise and certainly not conceal teaching DDs GC views.
He's an idiot. She should make this clear to him. He may leave, of course, or he may realise he is a prize idiot and change his mind.

My late DH was such.

He may get a rude awakening if he finds his DDs have to share a dormitory with an intact male who says he's a 'girl'. One can but hope. 💐

Just to pick up on your comment about Dr Upton crying. I saw the “sneering” as questioning what some think is performative. It’s thought that the Dr maybe spent up to 30mins searching for the senior consultant after leaving the nurse in the changing room. There are no witnesses (so far) to confirm this - which is odd in a busy department - we just know that the Dr was in floods of tears by the time of meeting Elsbeth Pitt. While I agree that men do have a lot more restrictions on their behaviour and clothing etc in this case there are questions about the timing & sincerity of the tears for believability of the evidence rather than acceptability from a male iyswim. Sorry for the digression

My DH and both our kids are as GC as I am. Oldest kid is late 20s, youngest is mid teens. Everyone voices their opinion and is unimpressed with where we’ve been on TRA rights, and we live in the US so we’re still dealing with some lunacy.

Im a registered Democrat, DH and eldest would say they’re libertarian but vote differently each time, youngest is leaning like a Democrat but not if the dems stay on this track. They all have no time for TRA extremism.

DH and both young adult kids are fully GC, although none of them are particularly keen to discuss it with me as apparently I go on a bit. Surely not. I do make them listen when important things come up, and DH posted the Supreme Court decision on his social media (he's quite active on SM, I'm not). I wondered how that would go, but all responses bar one were postive (and that one made no sense at all, something about male judges making decisions for women??). DH has asked me why women 'let this happen' (men in their toilets and changing rooms, men winning their medals and awards), I didn't really have an answer.

A subject to be avoided for me, I am GC, he is not, and calm conversation seems impossible. I wish it were different.

My DH hadn’t really given it a lot of thought but nodded along with me a few years ago ago when I was going through my “err hang on a minute” enlightenment.

Then a colleague of his became a TIM and at first he would mention that this person was featured in the newsletter and emails were sent round about it in a celebratory way and he thought that was generally a nice albeit unnecessary thing to do.

He then told me a few months later that the TIM colleague wore clothes that wouldn’t be acceptable for women at work to wear (very short dresses, very high heels) and there were mutterings from staff and that this person had announced that he was going to start using the female toilets. I asked DH if anyone had bothered to check with all the women he worked with if they were ok with this or if anyone had clocked the obvious discrepancy in having and enforcing a business dress code for everyone except the person who had just announced he now identified as a woman. DH- not without some self interest realising that if it became litigious it would be his problem- was then fairly quick to raise it with his (female) boss who in turn was pretty quick to say we need to handle this carefully but he can’t use the ladies and someone needs to have a word about dress code. As far as I know it was resolved. This was all about 5 years ago and being GC wasn’t really acceptable, especially in that kind of workplace, I do think it was easier for him to raise it as a middle aged male in a senior position.

Mine is always instinctively suspicious of men’s motives and will automatically take the woman’s side so is naturally GC without knowing what GC is.

My DP is gender critical and believes that people can’t just change sex.

He most certainly doesn’t want our girls to lose out to men taking their places in sports teams or them being injured as a result of playing against males.

One of our friends from a different culture said that if you have a boy you only have one cock to think about but if you have a girl you worry about all the cocks. They deliberately chose an all-girls school as they didn’t want any cocks around their daughters and that included changing rooms. Not all cultures will necessarily find it easy to accept TWAW

But it's not exactly hypothetical is it? He's telling you who he is. He's a typical misogynist who believes men's feelings are more important than the safety of even his own children let alone other women and children. He sounds frightening.

I don't think you and your children are safe with this man and I hope you decide to get away from him. He doesn't care about any of you. That's what he's telling you. Believe him.

Supportive up to a point and willing to spend money on gardening. Dont think he will speak out to male friends who are TWAW if I'm not there.