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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

What do whips, spandex and dog masks have to do with Pride?

331 replies

SnugglyJumpersMakeItBetter · 05/07/2025 18:30

They're kinks/fetishes right? Not related to sexual orientation. Also why are they anything to be 'proud' of? Your closest friends would probably find it pretty odd (and stomach turning!) if you told them your OH likes to wear your undies, or what gets you off is him licking your feet... Why is proclaiming what should be personal and private turn-ons to the general public any better? Why should they be glad for you in any way for being so open about it?

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Barbie222 · 05/07/2025 21:53

A happy future is one where no one apart from your partner / partners has any reason to take an interest in your sexuality, because whoever you’re attracted to, you get the same respect. at the end of the day, pride isn’t about sex. It’s about being respected no matter who you’re attracted to, and being able to expect the same amount of respect as everyone else? For young kids, that means seeing lots of different kinds of families, and celebrating that diversity. It doesn’t mean seeing lots of different sexual fetishes, and celebrating their diversity. An adult only club or event would surely be the best place to celebrate that. No wonder so many LGBT people are embarrassed at what pride has become.

Helleofabore · 05/07/2025 21:53

Barbie222 · 05/07/2025 19:28

This reminds me of the discussion around Grandads Pride and those pictures which looking back absolutely were about the author giving a very clear message to those listening.

they were very frustrating threads those. That book was so very concerning. And just as concerning were the people dismissing the obvious messages.

DialSquare · 05/07/2025 21:49

SirChenjins · 05/07/2025 21:45

😂😂 not a chance they're lower

Edited

Maybe Aida was confusing testosterone with voice.

DialSquare · 05/07/2025 21:48

Some people are so fucking open minded that their brains have fallen out.

Barbie222 · 05/07/2025 21:48

Anyahyacinth · 05/07/2025 21:43

So many small minded comments, people at Pride are just expressing themselves...it does nothing to hurt children, quite the reverse it helps children see a whole wide world. Sex is EVERYWHERE in adverts, online everywhere. Pride is an event about love and safety and not being forced to hide. It's about choosing a happy future or going back to repression.

Really? There’s adverts with fetish wear on, before the watershed?

There you go.
theres a time and a place. Nothing about this is comparable.

rriffraff · 05/07/2025 21:47

The problem is that as you allow more and more straight people who are into kink into the parade you de-value the legitimacy of gay rights in the eyes of the public. The boundaries keep being pushed to the extremes and it risks a backlash.
Throughout 2023, the Public Religion Research Institute,Last week, the Organization released its findings on views about LGBTQ rights in the US. The survey showed for the first time support fell for key policies regarding LGBTQ rights, backing for same sex marriage dropped two percentage points, support for non-discrimination protections dropped four points and opposition to people refusing services based on religious grounds dropped five points.

In San Francisco Pride there was a guy stood in a child's paddling pool and passers by were asked to piss on him, it has no where to go but more and more extreme, and support for gay rights has started to reflect the backlash to this.

.

SirChenjins · 05/07/2025 21:45

AidaP · 05/07/2025 21:37

Lower than yours actually as I have no testosterones making facilities left. Try some better insults maybe?

😂😂 not a chance they're lower

ExitPursuedByABare · 05/07/2025 21:45

thenightsky · 05/07/2025 21:41

Pride month was June. Why are they expanding into July?

It never fucking stops.

mrshoho · 05/07/2025 21:44

I'm proud to be labelled a pearl clutching prude when it comes to protecting children.

Red Flags Reaction GIF by Kamie Crawford
Anyahyacinth · 05/07/2025 21:43

So many small minded comments, people at Pride are just expressing themselves...it does nothing to hurt children, quite the reverse it helps children see a whole wide world. Sex is EVERYWHERE in adverts, online everywhere. Pride is an event about love and safety and not being forced to hide. It's about choosing a happy future or going back to repression.

thenightsky · 05/07/2025 21:41

Pride month was June. Why are they expanding into July?

Barbie222 · 05/07/2025 21:41

AidaP · 05/07/2025 21:33

And kids don't have sex before marriage either.

Life and other myths our prude parents pretended to tell us, despite having kids at ~15-19 years old.

This makes no sense. So because some people have consensual sex before marriage, exposing children to adult sexualities is ok?

dogcatkitten · 05/07/2025 21:41

SnugglyJumpersMakeItBetter · 05/07/2025 18:30

They're kinks/fetishes right? Not related to sexual orientation. Also why are they anything to be 'proud' of? Your closest friends would probably find it pretty odd (and stomach turning!) if you told them your OH likes to wear your undies, or what gets you off is him licking your feet... Why is proclaiming what should be personal and private turn-ons to the general public any better? Why should they be glad for you in any way for being so open about it?

Symbolic of sexual freedom and permissiveness. Dog mask, no idea apart from concealing identity.

Pinkrabitt · 05/07/2025 21:40

AidaP · 05/07/2025 21:37

Lower than yours actually as I have no testosterones making facilities left. Try some better insults maybe?

You don't have any adrenal glands?

Barbie222 · 05/07/2025 21:39

Exposing children to adult sexual activity is abuse, and that goes for sex fetish wear too. I won’t be manipulated into believing that I’m being regressive or shaming anyone. If a child came into my Y1 class talking about whips and chains at a parade, and that his parents had passed it off as normal behaviour, I’d sure as hell be passing that on as a safeguarding flag - and I’d be doing the right thing by the law. You’ve made my case better than I could myself, @AidaP- the attitudes you’ve expressed here are deeply worrying and yes, harmful to children.

RapidOnsetGenderCritic · 05/07/2025 21:38

AidaP · 05/07/2025 20:17

Oh no, random stranger on the internet who knows nothing about me, besides that I am transgender, judges my parenting ability.

I need my pearls to clutch...

Do you have any boundaries? Should there be any boundaries in society? Is it OK for people to do whatever they like, wherever they like, no matter who they impact?

AidaP · 05/07/2025 21:37

SirChenjins · 05/07/2025 21:35

Your testosterone is high tonight Aida.

Edited

Lower than yours actually as I have no testosterones making facilities left. Try some better insults maybe?

ExitPursuedByABare · 05/07/2025 21:36

Say what now? My little ponies and BDSM? What have I missed?

SirChenjins · 05/07/2025 21:35

Your testosterone is high tonight Aida.

AidaP · 05/07/2025 21:33

Mischance · 05/07/2025 21:29

I think your approach is abusive - it abuses a child's need for a childhood and a gentle leading into the world of adults. You are imposing on them adult issues and values. You are wholly wrong to do this. They are only asking about kinks because you are exposing them to them.

And kids don't have sex before marriage either.

Life and other myths our prude parents pretended to tell us, despite having kids at ~15-19 years old.

Mischance · 05/07/2025 21:29

AidaP · 05/07/2025 21:13

Why is it one or the other?

My kids are with me and my wife at many prides, kink is involved, it's never a problem. Just like topic of sex is never a problem in our house, neither is the topic of kink sex. If they are old enough to ask, they are old enough to get an answer, as detailed as they are willing to keep asking.

Whereas many parents think that by creating some sheltered existence their kids won't find about it, completely ignoring that if you turn on prime time tv you will see the same, and more, than you will on pride. Or if you google, really, anything.

I think your approach is abusive - it abuses a child's need for a childhood and a gentle leading into the world of adults. You are imposing on them adult issues and values. You are wholly wrong to do this. They are only asking about kinks because you are exposing them to them.

SirChenjins · 05/07/2025 21:27

The horror is right.

AidaP · 05/07/2025 21:26

Catiette · 05/07/2025 21:19

If they are old enough to ask, they are old enough to get an answer

What if they didn't ask? Weren't even aware? Certainly weren't prepared? What if Pride could be a gentle induction into a supportive community at the time they need it most - of burgeoning, anxious sexuality?

if you turn on prime time tv you will see the same, and more, than you will on pride

Primetime? I don't know what the heck you're watching, but that's not the standard experience. That's kind of why we have a watershed and cinema age ratings and safeguards on the internet.

You really do seem to be arguing for the kind of Foucauldian free-for-all that damages the truly vulnerable in your community - those who really need protection, understanding and the wider support of an increasingly cynical public.

PS Not engaging any more, as this level of boundary-breaking, where age limits and child protection are concerned, leaves me deeply wary and not a little disturbed. If you're genuine, you're doing your "community" no favours.

Edited

Keep pretending that your kids are blind, and then be shocked why kids never have an honest sex talk with you, including about important concepts like contraception, or when something goes wrong. That trust and openness does not come from nowhere; every time your kid is afraid to ask about something, it erodes the trust.

I also do not think you've actually been to pride, given how you describe it, as that's not how any of it is presented. Or really watched much mainstream TV, even my little ponies cartoon ahs BDSM elements as in show jokes few times.

And yet you keep talking like some kink introduction expert. Hell, no one even asked, but no, I am not part of any kink, just happy transbian with my very cis wife and lovely children. But many of my friends are, and we have them, and their kids, over a lot too.

The horror.

But that's what happens when you engage in an attempt at good-intentioned discussion with someone not at that level, they will ask, get a good answer, and then move the goalpost.

And then make up about "increasingly cynical public" where pride that happened today was bigger than in any of the recent years, despite funding cut. Get out of your online echo chambers and into the real world.

SirChenjins · 05/07/2025 21:25

Don't be sorry 😊

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