Trans girl winning every race at primary sports day

It’s not ridiculous. It’s illegal.

Why is it up to OP to find a constructive solution? Why can’t the school be told to follow the law?

Why should OP suggest getting rid of girls’ races and replacing them with a mixed relay? What about the feelings of the girls - including OP’s daughter - who could have won a single-sex race? Why don’t they matter?

And when this temporary kindness is taken away from the boy when he hits certain developmental thresholds? What then? It's crueler to deceive them that they can run outside of sex class. Don't set the precedent then you aren't taking their 'right' away.

The girls count too. This boy is 'trans', not a high priest.

It's ridiculous to have boys and girls races then allow a boy to compete on the girls race. The kid also shouldn't be socially transitioned at school following the Cass review. My children's primary had team games on sports day with boys and girls on each team. It worked very well and your children's school was dumb to have run sports day like they did. Perhaps if you went to them with a constructive solution you might feel more able to raise a complaint op.

What?! It's all equal still?! You seem to have no understanding of the strength and physical power of a boy. My 8 year old son would sit on top of me and I would struggle to get up!

I agree with sleeping on it, you take youself out of the triggering mindset and you can see it objectively. It will mean that you will stay away from mud-slinging, and be able to maintain your point against what maybe some absurd arguments.

Something that is meant to be fun- has now become stressful for you and disappointing for your daughter. I also suspect that it is stressful for the teachers and staff as well.

It might be worth getting AI to write a letter to the school and you can read it and see if it reflects what you say. When making any type of complaint you need to be clear about what you want to change i.e. would you like them to change the policy or would you like them to remove the 1st place awards.

Lastly, its important to remember that if you chose to complain you are not the one hurting the child in question. It is the adults who have told them that everyone has to make accomodations for this persons internal discomfort with themselves at cost to others feelings. They are setting this kid up to be bullied, to be excluded from society and to be confused about themselves and have a narrative that they are being hated by others.

OP yes be that parent. 100% no question.

And for all you bleeting on about “but girls and boys at primary school have the same physical advantages” or “I know a girl who beat a boy in a race once once” or “the girls should just smile and have FUN” … honestly have a word with yourselves.

I feel very sorry for all the children involved here. The adults are failing them and need to do much better.

A child being labelled trans aged 8 is a safeguarding issue.

Aside from that, if 22 year old Tom with a mental age of 8 was permitted to race and win against boys aged 8 there'd be a flurry of complaints from dads.

Girls deserve better.

Be that parent.

Yep - cross post with last 3 posts, all saying the same (obvious) thing.

Ofc, I took 5 times as many words. 😅

It's another facile argument that irritates me in the sporting debate: some women have won against these men, therefore it's all good. I can never quite work out if people genuinely can't see, or are ignoring, the obvious.

Races are about who's best at racing. Even among the littlies.

Add in another factor on top of this - proportionately vastly different strength, build, lung capacity etc. (or slightly different, as at this age) - and skill is no longer what the race is about.

So yes, maybe a woman can beat a male interloper - but it is likely because her skill is so superior (and/or his so inferior) that it can offset the massive physical difference.

To use her excelling to this degree as "evidence" that he should be included in her competition is unspeakably ironic - and cruel.

There was a girl at our school who outcompeted the boys regularly, sure. But she grew up to be an Olympic athlete.

For those who dismiss separating sports event by sex in primary school, as the evidence shows those male athletes still have advantages, would you still be saying ‘it is just a sports day’ if no girls won at all?

And do you realise that the girls who do win have truly exceptional performances?. Because on average, those boys had the advantage.

You’re not the only parent who is pissed off at that family. It’s not the boy’s fault, in fact, he’s likely being emotionally abused by his parents which may lead to physical abuse once he comes close to puberty. They are not nice people.

Faster than some is the operative word. One girl who is fastest is an anomaly even at that age. And I have a DD who ran faster than every boy except 2 when she was 7. Today she’s a strong athlete.

but it’s not equal even at that age because despite those few exceptions, the majority of the boys beat the majority of the girls.

It's starts to matter now. No, it started to matter from the day that boy was introduced as a girl, from the moment the girls were told to lie to save a boy's feelings, were told to step aside and allow a boy to take their place purely because he was a boy who wanted it.

Absolutely not.

We are not going to continue to teach girls that mens feelings are more important than theirs.

I'd b that parent too. It's just not fair having mixed sex races. If be pointing the Headteacher to the recent court judgements and the fact males are now being excluded from female sport. This school is not above court judgements.

The school wouldn't let a Year 6 child identify as Year 3 and run in the Year 3 races. Or a parent run in the kids' races.

These experiences as a young child are very formative. I vividly remember being humiliated by my PE teacher in front of the whole class when I was 9. It put me off sport for 50 years.

Make a fuss, OP. It matters. You won't be the only one who thinks it isn't right.

If you say so.

And if the Y6 kid wants to race against the Y1 kids, should we also let him?

I agree. These are huge formative experiences. I'd be prepared to bet that most posters here will include sports days among their earliest memories. Why? Because of that sense of excitement that comes from competition, whether in the form of pride for the more sporty & successful, or... er... a certain tension for the rest of us (that would certainly include me!) Either way, though, it's centred on the anticipation of the race - where else would it come from? And your experience of that race crystallises what stays with you. You win, or get 2nd or 3rd? You remember it! You perceive unfairness? You really remember that.

I'd also add that, for this reason, I disagree strongly with any suggestions that parents shouldn't have applauded the boy etc. - at that age, he's a victim in this, too. But applaud the girls following him just as loudly. And then follow it up discretely but firmly. Because it's. not. fair.

As a non-sporty girl, I still have my skipping-100-times certificate, and still remember feeling I had a hope in an egg-and-spoon race (the starting gun put me right!).

Given how much I disliked athletics, it's actually quite revealing how many of my primary school memories are of this regardless. Because there was always the hope that I may surprise myself, and the validity of at least being able (OK, forced sometimes!) to try.

I don't understand the argument for taking this from multiple girls just to give it to one boy.

This!

BE THAT PARENT!

I have had female family members who have gone on to compete at elite levels of sports because they did well at primary school sports. Because they enjoyed their events and even got a ribbon.

I don’t know why people dismiss primary school sports days as not having importance beyond just being in it. Sure, for some, but for others it encourages them to do more sport and explore what they like or don’t like.

Poppycock

I would be that parent.
Sports is one thing but there is no way my DD would be changing for PR with a boy. Same with residentials. They need to get this sorted

No. Sorry OP, I am going to disagree with you.

It may be 'just a sports day', but these days are so very important to encourage girls to participate in sport. Girls who find they enjoyed the day and felt they were rewarded even in improving or getting a place may well go on to try more sports and get involved.

There is certainly more than one way to discourage a girl to not want to participate in sport. And that is dismissing this as not being an issue because a parent, doesn't put value in the day.