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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Today it's Amnesty Internation on Woman's Hour to discuss the Supreme Court judgment

458 replies

nauticant · 16/05/2025 10:21

With Anita Rani. I am not expecting much in the way of challenges.

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Strawberriesforever · 16/05/2025 14:52

jenfw · 16/05/2025 14:17

As someone who has been sa'd for a sustained period in childhood and also r*ped and now volunteer for a women's sa charity, yes I do. That charity has also set up another arm calle 'trans without abuse', which has received massive support. You can support both. In addition, I don't think you can know anyone about someone by looking at a font on a screen. What has come across through is the utter venom in you responses (as you feel strongly about the issue), so I'm out as these sort of interactions achieve nothing. Have a good day

So the women’s sexual abuse charity you work with has set up a third space geared to the needs of trans people? Wonderful! We might need those for prisons, domestic violence shelters, changing rooms and toilets too. And categories in competitive sports.

GiveMeSpanakopita · 16/05/2025 14:52

@jenfw it may interest you to know then that of the UK male population currently imprisoned for rape and sexual assault, a far higher % of those men identify as transwomen than exist in the general male population.

Men who fall under Stonewall's definition of the 'trans umbrella' are also disproportionately represented in known male serial killers than in the gen pop.

MistyGreenAndBlue · 16/05/2025 14:50

jenfw · 16/05/2025 12:56

Wrong. I've been on the gay scene for nearly 30 years. Met loads of trans people in clubs, etc. Never once felt threatened. Me and all of my female friends though have all experience things - r*pe, childhood sa, dv, gaslighting, misogyny, upskirting, having drinks spiked - none of which were perpetrated by trans but STRAIGHT men.

My experience chimes with @Toseland
Validation and intimidation has ALWAYS been the agenda; even in the early days many of these men were straight up fetishists. It was very clear.

EsmeQuibbles · 16/05/2025 14:42

LesserCelandine · 16/05/2025 14:38

This thread is very nostalgic - all the tired old gotchas.

Almost as if someone didn't want us to discuss Amnesty International and Women's Hour, and how appalling their (AI) spokesperson was today.

KnottyAuty · 16/05/2025 14:39

ThatsNotMyTeen · 16/05/2025 10:37

No one is saying trans people should be discriminated against you doughnut just that they are not the opposite sex so shouldn’t be in their spaces

Even clearer - trans people with GRCs aren’t entitled to be in women’s single sex spaces.

… The self-ID case was lost a couple of years ago saying the same….

trans people are entitled to privacy & dignity - just not at other people’s expense

LesserCelandine · 16/05/2025 14:38

This thread is very nostalgic - all the tired old gotchas.

ItsCoolForCats · 16/05/2025 14:37

jenfw · 16/05/2025 13:45

But are they though? Do you have any stats on this? It's a non issue in my opinion. If men want to attack, they will - and the kind that do this, from my experience, aren't going to go to the trouble (or humiliation) of wearing a dress. This discourse is completely distracting from things that are an actual and ubiquitous threat, ie the incels, the Andrew Tate followers. I've seen horrendous things said about women on Facebook. Threats of violence, r*pe, disgustingly misogynistic comments. I've reported a tonne. None have ever been taken down. I've seen and heard boys my son's age (11), saying the most awful things about girls. My friend's daughter, who is 14, had a private Snapchat video of her (which she sent to a straight boy) passed around the whole of the high school. The real, credible, ubiquitous verifiable threat to women and girls is straight men who are not educated / taught to respect women and girls, usually down to historical, cyclical family attitudes / toxic masculinity. In addition to organisations being institutionally misogynist. Jesus, a serving police officer ended the life of an innocent woman walking home. Something is wrong when an organization that is supposed to represent the pinnacle of morality and law causes harm to women. It's 'not a few men wearing a dress' that is a threat to women and girls. It's the macro structure of society and how it embeds misogyny that is the real problem.

You think men like Cameron Downing being able to self ID into a women's rape crisis centre is a 'non issue'?

Can you really, genuinely not understand why rape survivors might want to law to be clear that if a service is advertised as single sex, it really means single sex?

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2024/07/17/predator-cameron-downing-trans-inclusive-rape-crisis-centre/

JasmineAllen · 16/05/2025 14:36

Anyway, to get back to the original thread.

As I didn't manage to listen to WH, were there any questions at the end pertaining to AI's performance? Maybe someone pointing out he wasn't making any sense?

Or is that too much to hope for?

Shortshriftandlethal · 16/05/2025 14:34

On the subject of the gay scene and gay men.......and I've had 'best gay male friends' and have been around the scene in earlier years - and I think gay men still remain very male in their outlook and approach, certainly when it comes to matters of sex and the body, and are not shy or backward in making comments about women's bodies or body parts....and that is before you get on to DRAG.

Gay men may appear to have sympathy with women, but when it comes down to it i think there is an inherent distance at the same time too......a distance which makes me very aware, for one, of my own sex based differences.

Gay men tend to be a lot more promiscuous than most women and have a certain quite detached attitude to sex. Gay men are just as fetishistic as men more generally, I find.

Strawberriesforever · 16/05/2025 14:33

jenfw · 16/05/2025 13:45

But are they though? Do you have any stats on this? It's a non issue in my opinion. If men want to attack, they will - and the kind that do this, from my experience, aren't going to go to the trouble (or humiliation) of wearing a dress. This discourse is completely distracting from things that are an actual and ubiquitous threat, ie the incels, the Andrew Tate followers. I've seen horrendous things said about women on Facebook. Threats of violence, r*pe, disgustingly misogynistic comments. I've reported a tonne. None have ever been taken down. I've seen and heard boys my son's age (11), saying the most awful things about girls. My friend's daughter, who is 14, had a private Snapchat video of her (which she sent to a straight boy) passed around the whole of the high school. The real, credible, ubiquitous verifiable threat to women and girls is straight men who are not educated / taught to respect women and girls, usually down to historical, cyclical family attitudes / toxic masculinity. In addition to organisations being institutionally misogynist. Jesus, a serving police officer ended the life of an innocent woman walking home. Something is wrong when an organization that is supposed to represent the pinnacle of morality and law causes harm to women. It's 'not a few men wearing a dress' that is a threat to women and girls. It's the macro structure of society and how it embeds misogyny that is the real problem.

Yes, and women’s spaces are meant to feel like a safe escape from that male violence. Which they don’t anymore if a small number of transwomen or men willing to pretend to be transwomen use women’s spaces as a platform to abuse, harass, or just to make women feel uncomfortable. So having the right once again to insist that female prisons and rape crisis centres and changing rooms and hospital wards can be segregated by biological sex helps women retain those small places of sanctuary from male violence, which yes, is absolutely mostly coming from straight biological men who are not transwomen.

Datun · 16/05/2025 14:32

jen, so when you said ' I don't think these conversations really help anyone, just create more hate, misery and division.' you do actually agree with the premise that we're talking about here??

Have we been talking at cross purposes, in that case?

jenfw · 16/05/2025 14:28

sanluca · 16/05/2025 14:26

Do you know the case of Sarah Summers? She asked for a support group that was female sex only. Just one, next to the mixed sex, trans and men only.
She was denied group therapy.

That's not right. I will look it up. That certainly would not happen where I volunteer.

ThatCyanCat · 16/05/2025 14:28

jenfw · 16/05/2025 14:23

I think the answer is to provide women only and gender neutral toilets / spaces which are found in quite a lot of cities now. Would ensure that everyone is protected.

Edited

So you're in favour of single sex plus third spaces?

Great. So what are you complaining about?

Datun · 16/05/2025 14:28

*jenfw

so hold on, are you actually agreeing that women should have single sex spaces? Or is it just rape refuges and prisons, but not toilets and changing rooms??

Shortshriftandlethal · 16/05/2025 14:27

jenfw · 16/05/2025 14:23

I think the answer is to provide women only and gender neutral toilets / spaces which are found in quite a lot of cities now. Would ensure that everyone is protected.

Edited

I agree!

sanluca · 16/05/2025 14:26

jenfw · 16/05/2025 14:21

They are provided and there is no threat of them being withdraw. In addition, most of the 25 women that come to the support group have no problem with trans men as the issue has been discussed. Everyone who attended has experience dv from their partners, who were all straight, male presenting men.

Do you know the case of Sarah Summers? She asked for a support group that was female sex only. Just one, next to the mixed sex, trans and men only.
She was denied group therapy.

jenfw · 16/05/2025 14:26

ThatCyanCat · 16/05/2025 14:24

Do you agree that women should have a right to a single sex rape support service?

As a survivor myself, of course.

EsmeQuibbles · 16/05/2025 14:25

I had a look at Amnesty's site to see what they were doing for women and girls in Afghanistan.

The irony of their Donate comment below after listening to Sascha today!

The speed with which the Taliban have dismantled the human rights of their population – especially for women and girls – is shocking. We must take action.

TheOtherRaven · 16/05/2025 14:25

jenfw · 16/05/2025 14:23

I think the answer is to provide women only and gender neutral toilets / spaces which are found in quite a lot of cities now. Would ensure that everyone is protected.

Edited

In which case what 'division' are you talking about?

This is the SC judgment: single sex spaces and resources plus additional resources which may be gender neutral or more specific depending on need.
If you're for this, what's the lecturing all about?

Datun · 16/05/2025 14:25

jenfw · 16/05/2025 14:17

As someone who has been sa'd for a sustained period in childhood and also r*ped and now volunteer for a women's sa charity, yes I do. That charity has also set up another arm calle 'trans without abuse', which has received massive support. You can support both. In addition, I don't think you can know anyone about someone by looking at a font on a screen. What has come across through is the utter venom in you responses (as you feel strongly about the issue), so I'm out as these sort of interactions achieve nothing. Have a good day

But you still think that women survivors of sexual abuse shouldn't have their own spaces? That men should be allowed in their toilets and changing rooms.

that's not the sort of feminism that works on this board.

JazzyJelly · 16/05/2025 14:24

jenfw · 16/05/2025 14:12

Why would you embarrass yourself like this? You are a grown woman, hitting those keys and coming out like a child in a high school playground. You don't agree with me - that's fine, but there is no need to spit venom, sarcasm and childishness out in response.

I'm not even slightly embarrassed, but then, I'm not the one who's advocating for rapists in women's prisons because 'men will rape anyway' 'men are sad' and 'what about unicorns (sorry, people with both sets of genitals)'.

ThatCyanCat · 16/05/2025 14:24

jenfw · 16/05/2025 14:21

They are provided and there is no threat of them being withdraw. In addition, most of the 25 women that come to the support group have no problem with trans men as the issue has been discussed. Everyone who attended has experience dv from their partners, who were all straight, male presenting men.

Do you agree that women should have a right to a single sex rape support service?

sanluca · 16/05/2025 14:24

Datun · 16/05/2025 14:03

Jen has anyone ever said to you that you cannot make laws, or bring in far reaching policies, affecting the entire population, based on your mates?

You do realise that women have different experiences from one another?

The woman at the centre of the Darlington nurses case for instance, was raped for six years by her own father. When she went to get changed in her changing room at work, there was a man getting changed down to his underpants, and she thought she was going to pass out from the fear. Especially as he kept asking her why she wasn't getting undressed.

This woman, in an effort to help justify the position of herself and other nurses has gone onto national media to talk about her terrible childhood sex abuse. Something even her own adult children knew nothing of.

The percentage of women who will suffer sex abuse at the hands of men is huge.

They should not have to have their trauma plastered all over the papers in order for people to understand this.

In order for people to understand that sometimes, when they're vulnerable, or disrobing, or throwing up with morning sickness, or washing out menstruation accidents from their clothes, they bloody well need a space which excludes men.

Irrespective of all the reasons why men think they shouldn't have it.

Drag your eyes off the men for one fucking second.

Edited

I think this needs to be said over and over again. @jenfwyou cannot make laws based on your mates or your childrens silblings. You need clear laws with clear workable definitions that everybody needs to stick too. Laws need to work for nice people and especially for not nice people.

TheOtherRaven · 16/05/2025 14:23

You're not a feminist in all honesty, you are fooling yourself. Feminism means caring about all women, not just your mates and people like you (who are good girls who put men first).

If you come to a women's rights forum, and say silly and offensive things that really are anti-women (while saying you're a feminist), you cannot expect to be clapped and indulged, or that people won't get irritated with you. Your CV is not relevant: we've all got them.