Banned from breastfeeding group for objecting to males breastfeeding

I am not a TERF, I don't have a problem with terms like chestfeeding and I wouldn't have a problem with a transwoman who's just had a baby being at a new mum group with her wife.

But this just seems... wrong, because if the only way you can lactate at all is to take significant amounts of various drugs then surely that's potentially not good for the baby who has to come first here?! If there's a parent who can easily and naturally lactate surely you'd default to them, regardless of who is male or female or mother or father or anything.

It worries me that there's not enough evidence of safety or quality of the lactate produced by transwomen taking these drugs too.

Gosh @Kay2000 it’s almost like you didn’t actually read my post and just jumped to some conclusions. I’ve been a breastfeeding counsellor attached to a reputable support organisation for over 20 years. But thank you so much for enlightening me about supply and demand, nipple confusion, the way breastmilk changes etc. There has been analysis done on the secretions from male breast tissue. It’s not identical to actual breastmilk from a woman, (and I didn’t say it was) but it has similar composition.

As you were.

This would seem to be a good way forward!
I'm so sorry OP & I agree with you 100%.

Well done OP for standing your ground.

Wtf is going on. Utter madness.

🤢

Nobody is 'falling over themselves' to let trans people do anything.

You can object to issues without getting drawn into the surrounding hysteria.

Actually, I'd be contacting Social Services. That man is a wrong 'un who is involving a child in his sexual fantasies.

I’d be sceptical of that pub.med. It is only the abstract, and this stuff is so lacking in any rigour that you’d have to see the research proper. There is so much citing that can be based on a house of cards.

I do remember one instance of some lad ‘reporting’ (remotely) to a doctor about his amazing secretion production. This was not only unverified, but became some sort of report.

They’re both equally awful

The most important person in the room is the baby. The focus should always be on what is best for the baby.

An adoptive mother may like to induce lactation for her baby. This would be a better option than only formula milk

A lesbian couple may wish for the non birth mum to induce lactation if the birth mum is going back to work after a few weeks / months for example or often has long periods of time away from baby

However, a non birth mum who just wants to experience breastfeeding and the birth mum would have to pump for every missed feed in order to support this non mothers 'want' is clearly not in the best interest of the baby or the birth mum

Same with a transwomen...not got the baby but the for the TW. Let alone the chemically induced excretions are nothing like the responsive breast milk gym the birth mum

....and...women have a right to meet as a single sex group. The dynamics of a women's only support group are totally changed when there's a man present.

So sorry this happened to you. You are right the world has gone mad and the women who go along with it are just as creepy as the men doing it. I hope you manage to find another group.

It’s ridiculous, that should be a safe place for women

I didn’t know that was possible either, surely as they don’t actually have natural breasts the amount of milk they could produce ( if they can) would be minimal?

I agree it is bizarre behaviour from the mother but don’t make a woman responsible for the extremely questionable behaviour of her husband. It’s him who is in the wrong here. (And the breastfeeding support group leader).

What kind of mother even considers this for her baby? wtf

The world’s gone mad

It’s not similar to breast milk, which changes consistency between feeds to meet the needs of the baby. All men on hormones produce is some sort of milk like secretions. After the BBC tried to report men’s milk was as good as women’s, it was thoroughly debunked. Women produce milk in quantities men can’t. The male breast tissue is different to women’s too, not surprising since we were designed to feed babies, men are not. There also has been no research on the damage done to the baby, taking on who knows what drugs (whilst women are told not to even take paracetamol or eat soft cheese 🙄) , or the fact that anything else fed to the baby (bottle etc) risks disrupting the natural supply of the mum.

Unfortunately I can completely believe this. I ended up leaving two different online breastfeeding support groups because they a) seemed very willing to allow trans women to join, b) supported the use of the term “chestfeeding” rather than breastfeeding and c) frequently referred to “parents who breastfeed” rather than “mothers” in order to be more inclusive…

Good god please let there be an end to this madness!
”Give me wife a break from breastfeeding “
Read fulfill your insane wish to breastfeed a child when you were born, and are, a man.
Who the fuck are these women that allow this shit to happen?!?!

As another poster said, for gods sake look after your child!

I meant because OP is a new mother herself - so if SS are completely captured, they may decide to investigate OP’s parenting instead if they think her views (that men are not women) are ‘concerning’ to them and pose some sort of ‘risk’ to her child.

Sure, it would hopefully not go anywhere, but they can still make OP’s life unpleasant and stressful by forcing her to jump through their hoops if they’re minded to.

Obviously, in a sane world, the notion that SS would investigate a new mother for saying that sex is real would be completely preposterous, but there have been so many bizarre decisions by various authorities in modern times that I don’t personally trust the words “that could never happen” any more.

I am continually amazed at how crazy the world keeps getting. It’s twisted and the poor baby! Why is nothing sacred for women anymore?! We can’t even be allowed to be called mothers in case it offends anyone.. now this!

@snickerdoodle1990 if the group is run by individuals, without the backup of an organisation then it’s possibly not the best group to be attending. Without good up to date training, on breastfeeding, latch & positioning, and a bunch of other things including safe guarding and confidentiality agreements, it’s not a safe space.

Can you see if any of the recognised breastfeeding support organisations run groups in your area? Not only will you get accurate advice, you’ll be able to insist they abide by the SC ruling on single sex spaces.

Unfortunately this is a thing, look up Mr Menno on YouTube interviewing a breast feeding councillor, it’ll make you feel better. I have my own opinions about men who do this, and all relate to the abuse of the baby. Breastfeeding is about the needs of the baby, nothing else. It’s beyond sickening that women/experts think it’s ok, because it isn’t. I’d gather the other women who disagree and leave, loudly. I’d personally shout about it to anyone who’s willing to listen, but I’m quite Terfy and don’t care who I piss off now 🤣. But I’d make sure that everyone local who’s pregnant and may use this service knows about it. Hopefully the more the general public hear about this the more pushback it’ll get, like the rapists In women’s prisons got. Meanwhile, enjoy your baby and hopefully get support from the other (sane) mums.

Well if everyone who felt the same way as you stopped going because of this the leaders would need a rethink. Voting with your feet is the answer, shame though it is.