Banned from breastfeeding group for objecting to males breastfeeding

I’m not connected to LLL @Kay2000. I said at the outset that not only does this man not belong in a breastfeeding support group, but that men shouldn’t be inducing lactation to try to feed babies to fulfil their kinks and fetishes.

Tell her she’s not welcome.

She is welcome though, the group has made that perfectly clear. It's OP who isn't welcome.

On what planet does turning up to a support group for anything with the sole purpose of trying to get someone to "cause a scene" (aka causing a scene yourself) help the people who are there for support?

There are better, more mature ways to fight your battles.

It’s difficult to focus on your own baby when there’s a storage man in the room staring at your boobs.

Transwomen are biological males and should not be in spaces if women are exposed. It’s a disgrace

A mother is a woman. And we have recently had it confirmed that women are female.

To say nothing of the fact that a break from breastfeeding is the last thing the mother needs if she wants to keep her supply going.

I think trans women can actually be called mothers, strange I know, but the legal and social definition is below,

Social or legal definition:

• A mother can also be someone who raises, nurtures, or cares for a child, regardless of biological connection—such as adoptive mothers, stepmothers, foster mothers, or trans mothers.

The group venue is properly referred to as “there”.

Unless you’re the breastfeeding man OP is talking about, how on earth can you possibly know what pronouns he prefers?

The MAN fathered a child with his sperm a year ago he hasn’t magically turned into a woman in the intervening months.

Which means they are a man.

@Cailleach1 I know that’s only one paper, and only an abstract, but I’ve read about male lactation several times, but unfortunately the current internet obsession with ‘trans-women’ means that when I was looking for studies I got bogged down in fetish nonsense, and honestly, I lost the will to live.

But they are a Trans Woman, not a Man!

The fact that you’re a breastfeeding counsellor means nothing as La Leche League shows. Do you think men who pretend to be women can and should be helped to breastfeed or not? If not, we’re on the same side. If you do, as you were…

It’s a couple of women on their own… There’s a few pop up groups across the city and they go to postnatal wards etc to help new mothers

It might be a small company run by two lactation consultants or similar, but they will have a contract with the local NHS trust (or they wouldnt be allowed in the hospital) or public health, or whoever is paying them.

They must have had their training and accreditation from some organisation or other.

These are two avenues for complaints.

You should be able to find out who they are from the venue or their advertising materials, and you should be able to find out who commissions the service. If you talked to the leader privately and she told you not to come back because you don't share her beliefs about how men can be breastfeeding mothers etc then they have discriminated against you.

I suggest contacting "with woman" who are gender critical. They might have some advice. Here's their twitter. https://x.com/WeAreWithWoman

Same!! I didn’t produce any milk due to lack of the hormone that tells your body to produce it! Was just told you’ll have to formula feed

What happens if you keep turning up to the group . Is she going to physically remove you? You’ve every right to be there. Tell her she’s not welcome. Go along and let her make a scene. Get everyone’s contact details & start your own group.

A lactation of sort can be hormonally induced, but nothing like the quality or quantity of milk from the mum.

https://millihill.substack.com/p/bbc-admits-their-report-on-trans

If the person is a trans woman, they are male. I will continue to refer to males using male pronouns. Especially when the person in question isn't here to be offended or kick up a fuss. He may like to think of himself as a woman, but he's not. 💁

Women shouldn't be expected to discuss private matters like difficulties with breastfeeding with men sitting there listening.

when the secretions are analysed it is similar to female breastmilk.

The testing has only been of macronutrients (protein, fat, carbohydrate) and found it was similar. Not identical. Levels were the same or higher. Which was reported as 'just as good', but it might not be. For example additional protein might help growth, or might overload the baby's kidneys.

No testing was done of micronutrients (vitamins, minerals) or immune components. Or of variation through a feed to according to the baby's age - in women there are huge changes with both these factors.

And that testing was not on the milk of men taking drugs to deliberately induce milk production, it was a man with a medical condition and drug side effects from treatment. So no testing of drug residues in the milk.

There's another paper 'studying' a man deliberately inducing milk production specifically to feed a baby. But the paper's trash - milk wasn't tested; the paper claims exclusive 'chestfeeding' for several weeks, but the claimed quantity produced was far too small to do that; and the researcher never actually met or assessed the baby and didn't observe feeding (so it's possible it was a fabrication).

But that's not really relevant to the inclusion of this particular man in your group. The point is that this is a situation where it's totally reasonable for women to have a single-sex group. The supreme court ruling clarified it's permissible to exclude all men - regardless of identity or certificates. And including a man is a serious detriment to the women who then self-exclude.

The person trying to breastfeed their child that OP objects to is properly referred to as she.

And yes, it has been shown that with the appropriate intervention trans women can lactate.

The mother you objecting to has every right to be their - unless the relevant service makes this a single sex space and feels it can evidence a proportionate reason for making it such.

OP please focus on your own child at this critical time and stop worrying about how other mothers parent theirs.

Gosh that baby should not be drinking whatever is coming out that man’s nipple

That's a shame for you and all the women in the group who are probably uncomfortable with his presence but not confident enough to raise the issue.

The thought of the poor baby forced to try to feed from that individual is... just revolting, honestly.

Men don’t belong in breastfeeding support groups. No. The leaders of your group were completely wrong in how they handled the whole situation.

If they can then there is really nothing we can do to stop it, just because we don’t like or agree with it

Get together with some of the other mums and start your own group