Thank you for the good wishes!
"OP unfortunately if you were a trans woman you would have been torn to shreds on here."
I highly doubt that. To be more precise: I highly doubt that a transwoman would be torn to shreds JUST for being a transwoman. People would be wary, yes, and she would be made highly aware that she is a man in a place mostly populated by women, but I don't see why she would automatically be rejected.
"Every post would state you're a man and refuse to entertain your thoughts on the matter."
Did you see me barging in claiming to be a man? No, I didn't. That's the difference with all the transwomen I've seen coming on here so far: I accept my biological reality. I am a biological woman and I'm not afraid to own it. A transwoman is a biological man and they need to own it as well.
" I wonder if they'd be happy to call you he/him as you probably prefer being a trans man as they certainly wouldn't call a trans woman she/her."
I expect to be called she/her. I accept that on this forum, people call you by your sex, not your gender.
" I find the disconnect between how trans women and trans men are treated quite strange."
I don't. In my experience, transmen are far more likely to be respectful of other people's opinions and of the law, while transwomen are far more likely to be entirely self-centered and demand that other people twist themselves around them, even in their own spaces. That this creates a huge different in how transmen and transwomen are received is only natural.
"You have both wanted to change to the opposite sex"
That is utterly impossible. I'm a biological woman and I'll always be a biological woman. I have only made drastic cosmetic changes to my body in order to support my request that I be socially treated as a man (and because it fits my own apprehension of my body better, but that's entirely personal.)
"No one has really challenged you at all in the way they would a trans woman."
What would they challenge me on?
"But a bit of understanding both ways would be nice."
People here have shown nothing but respect for my feelings of gender dysphoria, so yes it would be nice if in return transwomen showed respect for the fact that they'll never be biological women.
" would be nice if the discussion was a bit more balanced about trans men and trans women. If people are GC then surely they feel the same towards trans men as they do about trans women."
Why would they, when there are at least two massive differences between the two categories? One is a biological fact: transwomen are men demanding access to women's spaces, while transmen present no threat to women. The other is one of attitude: I'm not the only transman around here, and all of us accept to play by the rules of the place (for example: to be sexed, not gendered), while transwomen typically don't.
You're comparing apples to oranges. Just because both are fruits, doesn't mean they are the same. People around here show me respect because I showed them respect first. Let transwomen do the same and they'll see they can be respected too. In fact, I bet a lot of people here would love to hear from a transwoman who would explain her situation in a reasonable manner, and who would show that she understands why so many women are wary of her and don't want transwomen in their spaces.