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Original poster

Thank you, you wonderful ladies. I spoke out today for the first time.

35 replies

TeaAndCakeMakeThingsBetter · 26/04/2025 20:58

I’ve been lurking for a very long time, reading, absorbing and appreciating all the discussion on this board. I’ve tentatively raised the issues with some friends, although sadly some are fully captured that TWAW (whilst proclaiming their strong feminism 🙄), but never really had the courage to ‘go public’.

The Supreme Court ruling and the backlash has been going round and round my head all week, and this evening I felt emboldened to comment on the BBC facebook for the first time.There were so many comments on ‘what about the 6 foot beardy transmen’, ‘the poor trans women just want to pee in peace’, why aren’t all loos just unisex etc etc and I had comebacks for them all, largely based on information I’ve learned here. I feel like I’ve actually done something positive today rather than just getting frustrated in my head, so thank you, you wonderful wise women. I’ll continue to lurk and learn, and hopefully will be able to contribute more over time.

OP posts:
SidewaysOtter · 26/04/2025 22:35

Well done!

teawamutu · 26/04/2025 22:18

Had a chat with a new friend today. She's very spiritual and macrobiotic so I'd resolved not to bring anything up just in case, but she tentatively broached the SC verdict and admitted to 'not being sure'.

So I said what I thought. And what do you know, she's actually a terf. Albeit one who still wants to be kind (third spaces).

I think an awful lot of women are. I hope the ruling will help them find their voices.

allstarsuperstar · 26/04/2025 21:58

Well done! I've been similarly louder since the ruling.

They speak from positions of emotion, manipulation and/or ignorance. We have facts and logic. When more people speak out, women win.

Women can never be men. Men can never be women. Everyone knows it, including the diehards. The majority of ordinary people know it, too, and find the whole thing absurd and baffling. Frankly, the best thing to do is to state facts and use satire. The whole thing is laughable!

FiaMarrow · 26/04/2025 21:35

Alucard55 · 26/04/2025 21:12

Good for you. I asked my husband (who doesn't always understand but is supportive of women) if he would now welcome and accept these men who are men but another type of men into the men's toilets now and he screwed his face up and said well I don't want to. I said well the alternative is that they use the womens toilets alongside your mother and young female relatives. He had no answer to that.

I think we just keep using logic and facts.

Why didn't he want to?

Original poster
TeaAndCakeMakeThingsBetter · 26/04/2025 21:31

I reckon one of the biggest problem is that some men themselves are actually ‘transphobic’ and don’t want to accept trans women into their space. So rather than dealing with that, they’ve just shoved the problem over to women and with the bonus of being able to call us transphobic if we object. Loads of comments about ‘but what about a big burly bearded trans man in your loo, how do you feel about that?’ And I just kept saying trans men are entitled to be in women’s loos, and I welcome them there - what are you doing to make trans women feel welcome in the men’s loos? Not many had a comeback to that.

OP posts:
Alucard55 · 26/04/2025 21:12

Good for you. I asked my husband (who doesn't always understand but is supportive of women) if he would now welcome and accept these men who are men but another type of men into the men's toilets now and he screwed his face up and said well I don't want to. I said well the alternative is that they use the womens toilets alongside your mother and young female relatives. He had no answer to that.

I think we just keep using logic and facts.

Original poster
TeaAndCakeMakeThingsBetter · 26/04/2025 21:04

I have to admit, I’m a bit scared of any comeback. I’ve locked down my profile so there’s no personal information, and I tried to comment in a questioning kind of way rather than aggressively, but still 😬. I did quite enjoy asking men why they were so against making the men’s loos a supportive and safe place for trans women, and may even have suggested that was transphobic of them, but am slightly worried re backlash.

OP posts:
CharlotteFlax · 26/04/2025 21:02

Well done! I also stuck my head above the parapet today on my local Facebook group. Surprisingly much support for my stance that males, no matter how they identify, should just do the right thing and stay out of women’s spaces.

BCBird · 26/04/2025 21:02

Good for you. Biological women want peace and safety too. Trans women can go in the toilet of their sex. Their safety should not compromise our's

GargoylesofBeelzebub · 26/04/2025 20:59

👏 👏

I'm not so brave. I just liked a few comments. Would never have done that before though.