What questions should people be asking themselves?

I wouldn't go into specific court cases or toilets or specific situations straight away - i think it is incredibly important to be clear about what they actually mean by man/woman.

"Do you think there are any differences between a man and a woman, or are they both words used to describe adults of any biological sex? "

If they do think there is a difference, can they give an example of one? One thing that would differentiate a man from a woman - how would you know if you were questioning your gender which characteristics align with man /woman?

You might ask why the need for "No Debate", for all the " bigot" language, why the fear of giving any empathy to females in sport. Is this the normal behaviour of people who genuinely believe in what they're saying? Or is it more likely the fear that what they want to believe they really don't?

But in the end, people are allowed to disagree! If you have a polite conversation without name calling that's a success in itself.

Sadly I think people have an automatic sympathy for TW that they don't have for women. So I'd use that.

Start by asking if TW have the right to a female-only space, or be housed with female prisoners, or strip searched by a female. Presumably the answer will be yes. Explore this gently a bit - it's so the TW is safe, feels ok etc.

Then ask if the TW has a right to object if a man enters the female-only space, or is put in a cell with a man, or searched by a man. Why does this matter? Is it the TW's safety and feelings that matter?

Point out that when we think about TW we think from their point of view - they are looking at a man and feeling afraid and uncomfortable. Can we do that for women for a minute, think from their point of view? When they look at the TW and feel afraid and uncomfortable, does that matter? If not why not?

We had a male member of the HR team at work tell me that a woman could have a beard and penis.
I so wish that I had had the courage to turn around a D gush about how wonderful it was for him to accept that a gay man could have a vagina.

I would start with (if talking to a man)

“Tell me what makes you a man?”

If they waffle on about physical appearance, clothes, hobbies, “male” emotions etc I would then ask

”So if I were to wear trousers, trainers, hoodies and take up football and not talk about my feelings etc etc does that make me a man?”

And let the whole illogicality play out

Do you understand the principles behind safeguarding? Is it a good thing?

I tried variations of many of these on someone I talked to at work this week. None of them worked. It was actually a great conversation i.e. a logical, rational one where we both behaved as adults, but fundamentally the 'most marginalised, persecuted community' angle is still working, as is the 'if they make all the effort and look like women, why shouldn't they go into single sex spaces'.
I think the other thing is all the inconsistencies gender raises isn't known or really thought about by most people, all they see is the emotion and feelings from the trans community. Feelings trump facts every time. Especially mens feelings 🙄

Surely they would just say, they'd always been a woman inside or something. So from birth. ( gendered souls and all that)

If "woman" had been redefined just over a century ago to mean "any person of either sex who wishes to live according to the societal customs and expectations attached to womanhood", would the suffragette movement have even happened? Should those women - who did not wish to live within cultural expectations such as "women aren't rational so can't have the vote", have determined that they were not, in fact, women after all, rather than determining that the cultural expectations needed to change?

What is the future of feminism if we redefine the word 'woman' to mean that the stereotypes and cultural expectations are real and true, and biology is irrelevant?

Does being a woman mean having a female body and any personality? Or a 'female' personality and any body? What is progressive about labelling personalities as 'genders'?

Do you really believe a woman can have a penis?

Do people born with a female reproductive system face (historically or currently) any forms of oppression or marginalisation that are unique to them or that impact them disproportionately?

If so, don't we need a word that describes this group, which includes all of them, but only them, so that we know who and what we're talking about when we discuss the experiences of this group?

Why shouldn't this group be included in the protections of the Equality Act?

Am I a man ?

And: would you still think that if there wasn't a moral element where you feel like it's what you should think and you're a bigot if you don't?

Why do you really think a person can become or just "be" the opposite sex - whether by taking pills/having surgery or by simply saying so? How does that work?

I'd ask Do you think the Darlington nurses have the right to get changed away from a man?