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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Men in female only spaces

35 replies

Alucard55 · 24/04/2025 15:27

There's been a lot of discussion this past week around women's toilets and how we keep men out and police that. In an ideal world men would just stay out but that's looking increasingly unlikely. Every day there are men on mainstream media saying they are terrified in one breath then the next saying they will continue to use womens toilets. I've been following the other threads and am starting to feel like we are going round in circles (no disrespect to anyone fighting for the safety, privacy and dignity of women and girls).

I'd instead like to start a conversation about how this ruling will work in practical terms in places such as womens rape crisis centres, womens refuges, womens prisons etc. Basically places where entry is policed. Someone correct me if I'm wrong but my understanding is that a space or service where Identity is required can now legally say "no you cannot come in here this is a space for women only".

I hate to say this but could it be the case that while in reality we can't keep all men out of women's toilets, we can now be confident that men will not be allowed entry into the spaces where women are most vulnerable and scared?

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Alucard55 · 24/04/2025 20:38

Really interesting points of view and ideas. I agree that there could be another societal shift. Perhaps these clearly male people who are on the TV every day stating they will use the womens toilets and showing no regard or consideration for women are unintentionally doing more harm to their own arguments. Their very entitled, angry male behavior is there for all to see. For all the talk that they are a very small minority of the population they certainly seems to be a lot of men who identify as not men doing the rounds.

OP posts:
HollieHock · 24/04/2025 18:45

MissJoGrant · 24/04/2025 16:25

How is it a breach of the peace?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Breach_of_the_peace

Breach of the peace - Wikipedia

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Breach_of_the_peace

LyricalSixties · 24/04/2025 18:32

In practical terms, I think the ruling will allow women to challenge men in women's spaces. Either directly, if the woman has the confidence to do so, or indirectly, say in an employment situation. It's going to take a while, but the law is on the side of women who want only women in women's spaces! I think women who don't want men in their spaces (me included) need to protest whenever it happens - to whoever is responsible for those spaces.

Chrysanthemum5 · 24/04/2025 18:31

Well the university I work for has sent round an email today saying they know the ruling is upsetting for trans staff and students and that the trans policy (which openly states it makes single sex spaces into mixed sex spaces) remains.

Not a word about the needs or concerns of women

JulesJules · 24/04/2025 18:28

Agree Aston It's really pissing me off that nearly all the media coverage on this has been of the 'Poor little vulnerable menz, don't you feel guilty, horrible women, what are you going to do to fix it' variety. No mention of what women and girls have had to put up with for the last 10 years (unlawfully)

AstonScrapingsNameChange · 24/04/2025 18:22

I really hate the way the word "unsafe" gets trotted out to mean "made me feel sad'.

It's just another manipulation to make people think the poor loves are in fear of actual violence. It shores up the bs claim about all the beatings they are supposedly subjected to.

I saw a TW post on SM about feeling unsafe this week and I just thought "oh fuck off' you're a 6ft male, you don't know the meaning of the word"

It's DARVO.

JulesJules · 24/04/2025 18:12

I think in workplaces a man using the womens loos/changing rooms could be spoken to by HR, official warning etc. The employer may have to provide proper gender neutral facilities if they haven't got them already so can offer an alternative to the mens loos if those are just too non affirming "unsafe" .

myplace · 24/04/2025 18:12

When TIMs were using women’s toilets, if we gave them a dirty look we were bigots and could be challenged. M
Now it’s been clarified that if we give them a dirty look we aren’t automatically in the wrong.

They can no longer claim to be welcome when they were merely tolerated for fear of being called out.

LondonLady1980 · 24/04/2025 17:53

I don’t think the ruling will have any effect really on public toilets. Trans-women will still use them because who is going to police it?

I’m not sure how it will play out when it comes to toilets being used in private premises, for example workplaces, shops, restaurants, cinemas etc. I think trans-women will still use the female toilet and I don’t think the staff will do much about it. They won’t want the confrontation.

The ruling will obviously make things better in terms of keeping men out of women’s sports and women’s prisons and female hospital wards for example as that can be enforced.

I don’t think trans-women will accept the ruling that states they must use female toilets. They won’t roll over that easily I fear.

I think a very loud and aggressive pushback is coming our way…

RedHelenB · 24/04/2025 17:50

JellySaurus · 24/04/2025 15:58

My concern is that they will remove those signs, and the Women/Men signs, and replace them all with Unisex signs.

They could have done that from the start. So I expect what will happen is it'll go back to how it was.

IllustratedDictionaryOfTheDoldrums · 24/04/2025 17:42

It's the beginning of another culture shift. It used to be that men didn't feel like they could just go into women's spaces without consequence, then they found a loophole, now we're shifting back to when they couldnt get away with it easily.
As others have said, there are going to be more court cases, more clashes, more pushing back on both sides but the tide has turned hard towards women.
It's a long way from settled but we are gaining momentum. The lunacy was never going to be sustainable, not the moment it burst into general public awareness.

NPET · 24/04/2025 17:35

The ruling has been made. Unfortunately though WE have to enforce it. If I'm faced by a man in a wospace I'll think about telling him to ---- himself, but this is where safety in numbers comes in: if there are 2 or more of us, then out he will go!!
Seriously I don't think many men will risk breaking the law by looking like perverts.

NumberTheory · 24/04/2025 17:35

MissJoGrant · 24/04/2025 16:25

How is it a breach of the peace?

It would reasonably lead to women in the toilets fearing harm.

UpsideDownChairs · 24/04/2025 16:43

We vote with our feet.

Just like I've not set foot in M&S (not even for my traditional Christmas treat shop) since they admitted to having mixed changing rooms etc.

If a facility says it has single sex provisions, but doesn't enforce that, we complain, then we leave and make sure everyone knows that's the case that they are breaking the law by lying about their facilities.

WallaceinAnderland · 24/04/2025 16:31

MissJoGrant · 24/04/2025 16:13

Is there a specific law about men or transgender women entering the toilets marked women?

No, it's not illegal and never has been but as far as I am aware it does depend where the toilets are and why the man is there.

If they are in the workplace, employers have to provide single sex provision and can enforce that through their workplace policies.

If they are in private facilities with public access, such as a theatre or gym, the owners of the facility can choose whether or not to allow men into female only toilets but if they do they must not be labelled as 'women's' because they would be mixed sex.

If they are public toilets men can enter the those marked 'women' and it's not an offence unless they do actually commit (or intend to commit) an offence in there. However, it is socially unacceptable.

MissJoGrant · 24/04/2025 16:25

HollieHock · 24/04/2025 16:17

Interesting question. At the moment they could be charged with breach of the peace at the least. I wonder what else?

Perhaps government will bring in a new law? Perhaps we will have to fight for one.

How is it a breach of the peace?

MissJoGrant · 24/04/2025 16:23

HollieHock · 24/04/2025 16:14

They can't. I've just received a information pack on toilets from Let Women Speak. Hope link works.

https://letwomenspeak.org/so/46PPdPkh0?languageTag=en&cid=81f274da-58e8-4ef6-92b9-9b43d9210b6a

This seems to only apply to employees, not customers.

TheOtherRaven · 24/04/2025 16:17

TheOtherRaven · 24/04/2025 16:01

And we stickered.

Did us no good really, and people got arrested. And we were acting within the law.

It's also going to be the case that the more antisocial and anti women behaviour exhibited, the more the majority population will get really sick of all this. The comments in the newspapers aren't supportive.

Sorry Jelly, misread your post here as signs being forcibly removed and not the organisation just unisexing everything.

HollieHock · 24/04/2025 16:17

MissJoGrant · 24/04/2025 16:13

Is there a specific law about men or transgender women entering the toilets marked women?

Interesting question. At the moment they could be charged with breach of the peace at the least. I wonder what else?

Perhaps government will bring in a new law? Perhaps we will have to fight for one.

MissJoGrant · 24/04/2025 16:13

Is there a specific law about men or transgender women entering the toilets marked women?

HPFA · 24/04/2025 16:11

We should probably think of it like speed limits.

Just as you can't prevent every instance of speeding, realistically you're not going to be able to prevent every single trans woman from using a toilet everywhere. But the law is there - and it should at least discourage the exhibitionists.

I'm alert to the dangers of creating martyrs - making a public complaint about an elderly and appropriately dressed transwoman in a busy railway station might not actually be all that helpful. There's nothing wrong in making a judgement call on the actual circumstances around you.

WallaceinAnderland · 24/04/2025 16:09

There's a lot of bravado at the moment about how some men intend to continue to trample on women's rights but in practice I think many would be too cowardly now that women know they can complain. All we need to do is make sure that we do complain when/if necessary.

MissScarletInTheBallroom · 24/04/2025 16:05

myplace · 24/04/2025 15:31

We’re going to need to keep bringing the court cases wherever people are failing to reorganise in line with the law. It’s a culture change.

Lots of them will move themselves into line- Pool has, the government seems to have, EHRC has, school toilets are underway in Scotland.

When the schools and sport are sorted, that will have a significant impact elsewhere imo.

Many places want to do this but have felt obliged not to. They will shift quickly. Some places will be reluctant because of an embedded and unrecognised misogyny. They will need court cases. 🤷🏼‍♀️

I agree with this.

Court cases. Lots and lots and lots of court cases.

We just keep going to court.

Until rape crisis organisations accept that female rape survivors deserve help and support which is not conditional on pretending to believe that a man is a woman.

Until employers accept that failing to provide appropriate single sex toilets and changing facilities for their staff and enforcing the single sex nature of those facilities is not going to fly.

Until women have stopped being discriminated against for saying that 2+2=4.

Until theatres have been told that renaming their toilets "cubicles" and "cubicles and urinals" is indirect discrimination against women.

Until there are no longer any male prisoners in the female prison estate or male patients on female only wards.

In reality I think there will be more mixed sex toilet facilities in places where usage can't be effectively policed. But if the "trans women shouldn't be in women's toilets" message gets through at a societal level, I think that organisations which are in a position to provide additional mixed sex facilities alongside single sex ones will find that all but the most obnoxious trans people use them.

TheOtherRaven · 24/04/2025 16:01

JellySaurus · 24/04/2025 15:58

My concern is that they will remove those signs, and the Women/Men signs, and replace them all with Unisex signs.

And we stickered.

Did us no good really, and people got arrested. And we were acting within the law.

It's also going to be the case that the more antisocial and anti women behaviour exhibited, the more the majority population will get really sick of all this. The comments in the newspapers aren't supportive.

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