What brought you here?

People also make wild assumptions, don’t read the full thread, don’t read what the Op has actually said, and don’t make any allowances for other shit that may be going on in the background that we know nothing about. But hey, I tend to read the first page, roll my eyes and back away again. That’s not the best of MN. This section, and others like Elderly Parents and the book pages, are where sanity reigns.

The thing I love about MN and this topic - and I identify with what you’ve said about the environment @soupycustard - is that we talk about FACTS. In so many areas of life, people don’t like to look at facts, because they make them uncomfortable and mean they’d have to change their minds and then their behaviour. Such is human nature.

On the both the topics of groupthink and the rudeness of mumsnet, you can really see how the madness of groupthink and crowd mentality plays out in the wild piles on on mumsnet. Some poor OP will post an AIBU which would probably be a pretty innocuous point if discussed in real life but they'll then start getting a few disagreeing replies, and then a bit more and then suddenly it's a vicious group bash of the OP as people jump on the bandwagon fuelled up by everyone else's previous jabs. I have to admit sometimes I get caught up in it and then have to stop myself and think 'Hold on, why the fuck do I care that poor Aunt Mary is only invited as an evening guest to the wedding and not the actual service'

I know how you feel. It's destabilising to realise people whose world view you identified with and whose opinions you trusted (I'm looking at you Guardian columnists) don't appear to have any awareness of what's happening to women's rights at all.

@soupycustard excellent use of the phrase “blithering idiots” 😁

But I do agree, when I was cast out (with some of the excellent people who posted upthread) it was lovely that MN took us in.

@soupycustard embrace your snowflakeness. It gives me an excuse to hug something

Some of us are just so old that we've stopped letting it get to us. There came a time when I just didn't care any more about eejits disagreeing with me.

Haha I feel like I may have derailed the thread with my snowflakiness! Or maybe feminists are generally made of sterner stuff 😂.
The other thing that got me here is that there are very few opportunities in life - well, my life anyway - to discuss stuff that matters, and I appreciate an intellectual discussion. I'm a nerd and I can never get over how people waft through life without a deep thought in their brains.
I used to feel infuriated by the apathy around the environment, but am shocked to find that I'm even more furious about the apathy around genderism. And the intellectual vacuousness and general thoughtless stupidity.
I have seen many posts mention this, but it's very difficult to have been 'left wing' or 'a hippy' or 'green' and find that the people you thought were your tribe are absolute blithering idiots. And more than that, actually more hypocritical than the 'right-wing' who are at least honest about their venality and hatred of women.
So also I found MN when I was an outcast!

There are some baffling posters, not just on AIBU. But most people are luvverly and very clever and very funny.

The Christmas bargain threads are lovely - they’re like a safe haven. I do appreciate the bluntness on posts but the ones that are over the top mean, although it can sometimes be funny, I don’t enjoy so much. It very much depends on what the topic is. There is some very good advice on here on a massive variety of issues. It’s good to be informed of things and to have an idea of what you would say in a situation when it does arise.

AIBU can be a bear pit, but other areas can be wells of kindness and good advice.

And some of it is unalloyed silliness which I adore.

duc748, I am a proper snowflake though 😂. Despite having incredibly strong views on practically everything, any form of conflict makes me cry in a corner 😂
I can see why there's a bit of rudeness here because this stuff matters. But the number of just really ignorant rude posts on some of the other threads. Well, I just think people should use their aggression for stuff that matters, not for lambasting some poor OP who just came on for advice about paint!

I don't find MN particularly rude. If anything, less rude than I expected. It certainly wouldn't be the term I'd use to define it. I've said this before, but I do very much see MN as a force for good in the world, and there really aren't many corners of the internet you can say that about.

Haha Sometimes the rudeness does make me laugh! But I wouldn't want to be on the receiving end of it!

Othertimes, not.

Yeah. I quite like the rude, sometimes. Bracing.

First used mumsnet to find out more about breastfeeding - found it really rude.
Only came back when stuck at home in lockdowns. I have always been an environmentalist and therefore leftie, anti-global-corporate, very cynical about government greenwashing and hypocrisy, and I had concerns about the power that corporations seemed to be gaining via govts over those times. Somehow at the same time my DH (very feminist!) started a deep dive into trans stuff, and I found myself moving away from the insanity of 'AIBU to call the police on my mum cos she went for a walk' to the feminist boards. I don't post much but I have a very odd background in both law and science, so I put my oar in when I feel the need to be a pedant about words and scientific reality (or sometimes just when I'm really really cross!)
I'm still not sure I like MN. And I still find it really rude 😂

I've been on MN for years but rarely contribute, but I found that I needed a place where women were actively considering and discussing the collective madness that seems to surround us. I guess the trigger was hearing Sarah Owen (Women and Equalities Minister) on Womans Hour last week, she refused to define a woman and gave the usual "lets all be kind to one another" rubbish. It enraged me, actually made me feel unseen and I wondered if anyone else had heard it....turns out there was thread about it on MN and then I found this thread. It really helps to know I'm not the only person who is GC.

Here we go:
https://www.derbyshiretimes.co.uk/news/missing-woman-dressed-as-man-seen-in-dronfield-64108

That was about the same time as the Hauxwell "woman disguised as a man on the run" headline. Still one of my favourites - shows how far we've come in the right direction

I was a bit worried about Hudson going in a men's prison until RickRoll did her expose on here of Hudson's punter reviews and boasting about her 7 inch surprise 🤢🤮

That's the one, it looks to have been around 2015 too.
Hell, nearly a decade of this shit.

Govt lawyers argued that Hudson “is as a matter of biological fact a man” and add that the term “transwoman” has no legal significance. They used female pronouns ‘out of respect’.

Wonder if they’d take this stance now?

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2018/jan/20/tara-hudson-transgender-prisoner-sues-government

Was it Tara Hudson who had a petition going to get him and his 7" surprise transferred to a women's prison?

Discovering Mumsnet for the first time while I was breastfeeding in the wee hours of the night, realising what was going on and being utterly horrified at the institutional capture of just about every organisation in Scotland. Realising that my Government really couldn't give one single shit about women and discovering women's right networks so that I could contribute to the fight.