It's an odd situation really that two identical beings with different genitalia are treated so differently from birth. If we were all treated the same the world would be a better place.
And then
the man in question may love women dearly and love their beautiful clothes. Should he be condemed for wanting the same for himself?
Then the men who feels sexual in womens clothes. It isn't necessarily a bad thing in a healthy loving relationship.
There are bad people out there but we should not let their actions shape our lives. Be safe but don"t let it get to you and don't condem everyone on the actions of one.
There is a disconnect between the first and second statements no?
You seem genuine but like many men you are hopelessly naive about the reality of women (female people)'s lives and a little blind to how you are flipping between contradictory statements to justify what you want to do anyway.
That is normal and understandable. But from the perspective of a woman, it's clear that these social justifications are being filled in afterwards.
Going back to It's an odd situation really that two identical beings with different genitalia are treated so differently from birth. If we were all treated the same the world would be a better place, absolutely it would be a better world if that were true. But that is not the world we live in today. Arguably, even in the most utopian fantasy, one where Patriarchy and all the misrepresentation of women that it has wrought and we women still have to deal with had never happened, it could still never be the the case due to our differences in physical strength and the different physical, emotional and social cost and consequences of reproduction.
But certainly, in the non-Utopian reality we actually have to live in it is not the case.
So even while doing what we can to make the world better in the future, we also have the deal with the world as it is today.
And that means acknowledging that fpr we women living in the here and now, society has constructed meanings around women's clothes that are reductive and harmful to women, and women therefore have every moral right to question men who desire to adopt our clothing specifically because it is women's clothing.
Because we know that for too many of these men, maybe not you but enough to spawn pages and pages of porn, fantasy and misogynic rage, behind that desire is a belittling and offensive idea of womanhood, one they feel a desire or compulsion to adopt or inhabit in a way that they do not believe is open to them as men in men's clothes regardless of how skirted, sparkling or soft those clothes may be.
I feel very lucky that my family accepts me for who I am without judgement.
Perhaps you and your family really are those rare unicorns for whom clothing that the rest of society wrongly or rightly codes as "female" genuinely does carry no baggage, no connotation whatsoever of the sex who more usually wears it.
However if that is the case, please be aware that this unusualness also blinds you.
Women have genuine reason to feel discomfort or grievance when men take it upon themselves to redefine what it is to be a woman or reinterpret our experiences as embodied female people moving through life with all that entails including the pressures and meanings overlaid onto what we wear through the lens of their male experience.
If that is not you I am very glad. But please do not take it upon yourself to assume you know better than us how other men treat us when you are not there.