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Early loss / MMC TTC support - the club nobody wanted to join šŸ’”šŸŒˆ

34 replies

TinyBitChaotic · 06/09/2026 15:57

I thought I’d start a little thread for anyone who has been through an early miscarriage, particularly an MMC, and wants somewhere to find people who get it - wherever you are in the process.

This definitely isn’t intended as a pity party, or to suggest that one loss is harder or more significant than another. Every loss is a loss, and everyone experiences it differently.

But I do feel like an MMC can be a particularly cruel and surreal experience. Finding out at a scan that your pregnancy stopped developing some time ago, often when you had absolutely no idea, and then having to navigate the physical process afterwards… it can feel incredibly lonely.

So I thought it might be nice to have a little corner for people who are going through something similar and, eventually, want to find their way back to TTC.

No pressure to be positive, no pressure to ā€œmove onā€, and no pressure to have the right words. Just somewhere to check in, vent, ask questions, share little wins, or remind someone else that they aren’t alone.

I’m 35 and have a 4-year-old DD. I found out on Thursday at what should have been our 8-week scan that I’d had an MMC, with baby having stopped growing at 6 weeks. I’m currently on day 2 of medical management, so this is all incredibly fresh for me. I’m devastated, but also hopeful that we’ll eventually get our rainbow.
Realistically, I’m hoping that once I get my negative pregnancy test in a couple of weeks, I’ll be ready to try again. For now I’m thinking very low-pressure - no OPKs, no BBT, just seeing what happens. I know that might seem like I’m rushing ahead, but having something to look towards and some sense of control helps me process things.

Anyway, sadly welcome to the club nobody wanted to be part of. ā¤ļø

Hopefully we can support each other through the horrible bit, whatever that looks like for each of us, and eventually find our way out the other side. 🌈

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TinyBitChaotic · 19/09/2026 08:06

We’re slowly getting there! Today is exactly two weeks post medical management. I hope that is totally negative by early next week! šŸ¤žšŸ»šŸ¤žšŸ»šŸ¤žšŸ»

Early loss / MMC TTC support - the club nobody wanted to join šŸ’”šŸŒˆ
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mycatyells · 19/09/2026 10:06

@TinyBitChaoticthat’s such a frustrating result from the scan but your tests are looking great! Are you still bleeding??

This is my test from today, 10 days after miscarriage. I am still spotting which is annoying as my libido has made a surprising return (it was pretty low when I was pregnant!) but I don’t want to risk it until I’m actually negative.

Haaaate this waiting game and never thought I’d want to see a negative test so badly when for months I was praying to see a hint of a second line.

Early loss / MMC TTC support - the club nobody wanted to join šŸ’”šŸŒˆ
TinyBitChaotic · 19/09/2026 10:33

mycatyells · 19/09/2026 10:06

@TinyBitChaoticthat’s such a frustrating result from the scan but your tests are looking great! Are you still bleeding??

This is my test from today, 10 days after miscarriage. I am still spotting which is annoying as my libido has made a surprising return (it was pretty low when I was pregnant!) but I don’t want to risk it until I’m actually negative.

Haaaate this waiting game and never thought I’d want to see a negative test so badly when for months I was praying to see a hint of a second line.

That looks really promising! I think we’ll get our negatives right round the same time.

I am the same! I didn’t have ANY sex drive while preg but the last week I have been ready to go lol šŸ˜†

Bleeding stopped end of last week; right around 7-8 days after the medical management, I then had spotting for 4-5 more days but have had absolutely nothing in the last 2-3 days!

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TinyBitChaotic · Yesterday 07:56

We’re sloooooowly getting into very-faint territory but annoyingly not yet negative. 🫠
I am hoping by mid-week it’s gone stark white…I want it over and done with already!
Also probably TMI but had some brown spotting yesterday, so I wonder if that’s the ā€œthingyā€ she saw on the scan? Hopefully!!! šŸ™šŸ¼

How is everyone else doing, feeling?

Early loss / MMC TTC support - the club nobody wanted to join šŸ’”šŸŒˆ
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mycatyells · Yesterday 08:39

Definitely getting there!

I got my first squinter today, and my LH tests are looking slightly better. Hoping I ovulate in the next week, I usually ovulate pretty early in my cycle so assuming it’ll be a bit delayed but things are looking/feeling good! Have stopped spotting too.

We DTD this morning for the first time since. I keep reading stories online of women who’ve got pregnant the immediate cycle after miscarriage and feeling so much hope, could you imagine.

Early loss / MMC TTC support - the club nobody wanted to join šŸ’”šŸŒˆ
TinyBitChaotic · Yesterday 10:09

mycatyells · Yesterday 08:39

Definitely getting there!

I got my first squinter today, and my LH tests are looking slightly better. Hoping I ovulate in the next week, I usually ovulate pretty early in my cycle so assuming it’ll be a bit delayed but things are looking/feeling good! Have stopped spotting too.

We DTD this morning for the first time since. I keep reading stories online of women who’ve got pregnant the immediate cycle after miscarriage and feeling so much hope, could you imagine.

I genuinely think we are in the exact same spot, maybe +/- a day! We are inching closer towards that blooming negative!!! šŸ™šŸ¼

Well done for DTD!! We haven’t yet. I don’t know why! I’ve also read about how fertile you can be after a miscarriage, so I totally get the hopeful feeling. Let us both be lucky! šŸ€

Only difference is, I’m not planning to use OPKs… because I think I’ll obsess and I don’t want to, if I can help it. Although now I’m wondering if I should?! šŸ˜‚ I just really want to let this happen serendipitously. Like, we weren’t trying, we weren’t preventing, we just happened to have sex twice and BOOM - healthy, happy pregnancy. Is that too much to ask?! šŸ˜‚šŸ„¹ā¤ļø That’s the dream anyway!

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mycatyells · Yesterday 20:12

@TinyBitChaoticI will be so happy to see our negatives ASAP, ideally this week!!
And totally see where you’re coming from with the OPKs - it is SO easy to get obsessed. When we found out about our miscarriage I remember weeping to my husband ā€˜I can’t believe we have to start TTC all over again’ because last time I found it so stressful 🄲 However saying that - it just feels kind of normal now to track and graph and project manage my body. But it is what it is!

Janey3090 · Today 14:37

Hi all, this is exactly the sort of thread I was looking for! I am two weeks post D&C which I had at 9+1 (though baby stopped growing at 6+5.) This is following on from a chemical/early loss in April. The loss this time though hit me really hard and the grief felt overwhelming at first. I am feeling a lot better now though and ready to start looking forward again.

I have one DD who will be 4 at the end of the year, and she is my whole world. I'm just so desperate to try again, just hoping my body will kick back in quickly this time! I only had bleeding for one week post D&C and my pregnancy test I took yesterday was really faint, so nearly all the HCG is gone. So I'm keeping everything crossed šŸ™

So sorry you've all been through losses/MMC's, I wouldn't wish it on anyone xx

TinyBitChaotic · Today 16:42

Janey3090 · Today 14:37

Hi all, this is exactly the sort of thread I was looking for! I am two weeks post D&C which I had at 9+1 (though baby stopped growing at 6+5.) This is following on from a chemical/early loss in April. The loss this time though hit me really hard and the grief felt overwhelming at first. I am feeling a lot better now though and ready to start looking forward again.

I have one DD who will be 4 at the end of the year, and she is my whole world. I'm just so desperate to try again, just hoping my body will kick back in quickly this time! I only had bleeding for one week post D&C and my pregnancy test I took yesterday was really faint, so nearly all the HCG is gone. So I'm keeping everything crossed šŸ™

So sorry you've all been through losses/MMC's, I wouldn't wish it on anyone xx

Oh man, I am so very sorry for your losses! It is so bloody hard. I am sending you a big squeeze. You are so strong. We are SO strong. I keep thinking to myself ā€œa man could neverā€. Although my DH has been an absolute rock, we go through so incredibly much as women.

Glad to hear you’re doing better mentally, and your tests are getting fainter. Hopefully we all get our rainbow babies soon! šŸ™šŸ¼šŸ€

I got a real squinter today, I hope for a total negative in the next day or two! We also DTD yesterday for the first time in weeks. My sex drive was absolutely gone during pregnancy, then I had 10 days of bleeding/spotting, which has stopped and I have been feeling really horny the last week or so! šŸ™ˆ

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