Should probably be in the parenting section but posting for traffic.
DS is 4 years old and in nursery. He started nursery at 3 years and struggled to settle. During this time his DGP died and it made going to nursery even more difficult for him and I dont feel like the nursery really supported him. One day I picked him up and found him in a wicker basket chair and the staff said he had been there ALL DAY. They said he had come out for the toilet and for snack/lunch and that they had been checking on him but IMO leaving a 3 year old in there for 5 FUCKING HOURS is unacceptable. I work PT and with flexibility, my DH wfh most days and the reason I put DS in nursery is to help him socially with moving onto school (before DM was looking after him during my working hours). If they had called me, I would have come and collected him or came to help get him out of the chair basket and playing. I was so angry. DS said he felt really sad all day and that he was scared of the other kids. The nursery didn't bother their arse IMO. Surely taking the chair away when he had his lunch and supporting him would have been at least one option and I'm not a trained nursery teacher!
Fast forward to today, DS has settled since going back in August and has made friends and is happy. Since the start of the school year a new boy has joined and on four occasions has hit DS. The boy need additional support I'm guessing so I am not angry at this little boy but I am angry that the nursery are not doing anything to protect the other kids. Today when I dropped off DS the other boy was quite upset at the door and trying to get out. I waited until he moved away from the door and there was a staff member on the other side "supporting him" but not holding him so other children could get through the door. When the boy moved away I opened the door to let DS through because I needed to drop my older child off so they wouldn't be late. The little boy ran so I just put myself against the door (not in a blocking/defensive way, just to stop him running out of the building) and he turned and slapped DS across the face very hard. I shouted "oh!" out of shock and DS burst into tears. At that point the staff member took the boy away and I comforted DS. The head at the nursery was there and I told her I wasn't happy with how they are handling things, there have been 4 incidents since August where this boy has rattled my DS and all they can say is oh he's one on one (he's not, there's plenty times I've seen him alone at pick up) and its not just DS, the boy is reactive and it's all the children (so all the kids just have to put up with the staff not being able to control or help this kid?), we have measures in place but we can't tell you what (what measures though?)
The head nursery teacher has said she will call the HT of the school for a meeting. I'm not sure what else to say as they keep saying all the above and when I say I am not happy about how they are handling things they don't give me anything else, they just fobb me off. I am not angry at the little boy, he is only 3-4 years old, he has issues and I feel sorry for him but I am sooo angry at the nursery for allowing this to go on.
Could someone please help me to think of what to say to the HT so that this little boy gets help and that my DS and the other kids don't have to deal with getting rattled all the time?