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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To feel a bit rejected .. or something??

12 replies

pekineseasy · 08/11/2026 19:48

Had great evening with partner of ten months in his city last night. We were with his family and friends for an event . Slept very late today and felt rough after the night out.
One of his young adult children is going through a romantic crisis and is in a lot of pain .. crying etc .
She rang him Today wanting him home as she was so upset . I decided I was leaving to go to my own home as I was hungover, tired and I knew she needed support and tbh she talks incessantly about her ex boyfriend and keeps getting back together with him despite his awful treatment of her and I don’t know what else to say as she isn’t listening to advice from anyone.
I left and they were going to talk for the evening and get some nice food and watch a movie.
He’s just messaged to say he’s been out for a few drinks with a friend he’s met while out at the shops and is on his way home to his child now for a lovely evening.
were 50 btw .
Im hungover, possibly sensitive but still feel a little put out , knowing that he was happy enough for me to go home as he was going to have the time with his daughter. We see each other twice a week btw and talk/ text several times per day .
I know he’s struggling with his child’s mental health and continuous issues , romantic and otherwise. AIBU?

OP posts:
Gingerbreadseasoniscoming · 08/11/2026 19:51

What exactly is the issue here? You knew he was seeing her this evening, so you left. He bumped into a friend while free and had a catch up, and is now seeing his daughter as planned? Just go to bed, you're being silly.

gamerchick · 08/11/2026 19:51

Yeah a little bit. You're hungover, last thing you need or want is constant chatter about someone else's relationship. Especially when it's the same shit different day. He can focus entirely on his child and you can get some hangover food, snuggle under a blanket and watch some easy telly.

rubyslippers · 08/11/2026 19:52

There is no issue here

MamaNell · 08/11/2026 19:55

You’ve got Hangxiety and are being over sensitive. He’s probably fed up with his daughter not listening to advice either and much preferred the hair of the dog with a friend but you had left by then so couldn’t join in.
eat something, get some sleep, he still loves you

pekineseasy · 08/11/2026 19:57

I suppose I normally stay for an extra few hours and we go for a walk or just hang out but there is one drama after another and I know he’s struggling to support her and he feels like he never gets a break from it so I see why he went for some drinks because I’m not sure he could face into another evening of crying and talking in circles and refusing all advice .
I just felt that he was happy for me to go as his child needed this urgent support .

OP posts:
ColdAsAWitches · 08/11/2026 19:57

He's done nothing wrong. Nothing. He told you his plans, and then he did that. Bumping into someone could happen anyone at any time.

pekineseasy · 08/11/2026 19:58

Thanks ! I needed to hear I being
almost ridiculous !

OP posts:
70sgal · 08/11/2026 20:04

pekineseasy · 08/11/2026 19:57

I suppose I normally stay for an extra few hours and we go for a walk or just hang out but there is one drama after another and I know he’s struggling to support her and he feels like he never gets a break from it so I see why he went for some drinks because I’m not sure he could face into another evening of crying and talking in circles and refusing all advice .
I just felt that he was happy for me to go as his child needed this urgent support .

Ofcourse he was happy for you to go. He wouldn’t want you having to sit through that crap but he could not avoid it himself.

You’ve had a lucky escape and you’re never going to come before his kids no matter what their age, so get used to it.

Oh and you’re 50 btw, so grow up!

Arlanymor · 08/11/2026 20:09

You decided to go, he didn’t tell you to. You assumed he was going to ‘talk for the evening and get some nice food and watch a movie’ as far it sounds they are still going to do that, only he went into town for a bit, bumped into a mate and went for a drink before going home to do all of the stuff that you assumed (and presumably were fine with) already. You had a nice time yesterday with his family and him, don’t spoil it now because he bumped into someone, it not like he took an unscheduled trip to the moon. Sorry but you are being a bit silly - well a bit more than silly given you’re 50!

Millytante · 08/11/2026 20:15

You talk and/ or text several times a day? God I couldn’t keep that up. But presumably you appreciated the slight relaxation of this frenetic activity today, so count it all as a win, I’d say.

pekineseasy · 08/11/2026 20:23

I did tbh . I didn’t have the energy for another number of hours going round in circles despite feeling really sad for her. It’s difficult to listen to such awful behaviour from her ex/b/f for a couple of hours so I’m sure the couple of drinks he had softened what’s ahead for the evening

OP posts:
JMSA · 09/11/2026 01:19

You’re being too needy, sorry.

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