Had a huge row with DH last night- my best friend of over 30 years had started withdrawing from our relationship quite drastically.
My husband has said I am expecting too much from her- She has just got a new career role that she has gotten as the person she has been working under retired so she progressed and is now extremely busy. I was used to having a weekly phone with her during the day at some point which now doesn't happen as they have 4 kids and weekends are dedicated to them. Also she is now spending so much time with her husband I find it unhealthy. She hasn't come out of a weekend for months and keeps making excuses she is tired or has too much to do, which could be true as the new role is high up. We do text daily.
My husband said he and his friends speak sporadically a few times a month and at our age (44) that should be plenty.
I sent her a message saying I thought it was unhealthy how much time she was with her husband and that all her weekends seem to be about them going to do things and that I felt like I was losing her and got a reply back stating that when I am busy with my own family I rarely check in as well and it seems like I only have bought this up now she is 'matching my own energy'. She also said she doesn't want to go out loads anymore and is quite happy with how HER life is.
AIBU?