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AIBU?

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Update to AIBU to refuse Aunt's fwb claim on her estate.

756 replies

Sleepneededprettyplease · 07/04/2026 17:52

Posting here because it is where I put the first thread.

A brief summery is that my Aunt died and her FWB is trying to say that he is entitled to part of her estate because she had asked me to allow him to stay in a house she had invested in for me. Anyway if you want the full story feel free to read what I put on the first thread.

Anyway the main thing is that he is now sueing in the courts. I need a bit of a hand hold please. My lawyers have suggested getting a barristers opinion so I am just waiting for that. I wouldn't even mind if it was possible to just go to mediation but he wants the house for the rest of his life and won't consider anything else.

www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5505433-aibu-to-refuse-aunts-fwb-claim-on-her-estate?utm_campaign=thread&utm_medium=share

OP posts:
Sleepneededprettyplease · 07/04/2026 20:07

TheignT · 07/04/2026 20:01

Yes I knew someone in a similar dispute. The solicitors ended up with all the money.

A fair chunk certainly. Hopefully not the whole lot. It has already cost in the thousands.

OP posts:
BunnyMcDougall · 07/04/2026 20:06

Sleepneededprettyplease · 07/04/2026 20:01

He is defering lawyer costs and court fees are a few hundred.

Presumably lawyers know he won’t win, and won’t want to waste time on a frivolous case?

Sleepneededprettyplease · 07/04/2026 20:06

TwistedWonder · 07/04/2026 19:38

He thinks by threatening you with court you’ll offer him a pay off. He’s got £££££ in his eyes

The stupid thing is he won't take money. I would be willing to pay him off in reason. Say a years commercial rent as a lump sum or something. He however wants the house and I won't budge on that.

OP posts:
Seelybe · 07/04/2026 20:04

@Sleepneededprettyplease the advice from your lawyer surprises me. Do you really need to waste money on a barrister at this point?
He's suing you but claiming to be a dependant of your aunt. It is your house (being gifted is irrelevant) that you have allowed him to live in whilst she was alive. Surely any case against you would have to be around a de facto tenancy i.e. without a formal agreement?
Which would need to be resolved via end of tenancy notice/eviction processes. Suggest you check that out without delay so if that's the case you can give him Section 8 notice before it no longer exists from 1 May.

Itsmetheflamingo · 07/04/2026 20:04

Sleepneededprettyplease · 07/04/2026 20:02

It would cover me if I was sueing but not defending weirdly.

People always say home insurance on these threads but they rarely cover stuff like this. The insurance companies couldn’t afford to offer it for £150 a year or whatever it if customers could access tens of thousands of pounds for legal fees whenever they needed to.

Sleepneededprettyplease · 07/04/2026 20:04

Shouldgivethisup · 07/04/2026 19:24

There is a route re co sets that may be possible; you may be able to get an order to compel him to pay your likely costs into court, on the grounds that his case is rubbish. My mate had to remortgage when he was up against a corporate opponent but he won, that was a mean trick they played on him.

given he has no legal docs to prove his claim I think a good lawyer should be able to push for that. He will fold under the pressure and no ‘no win no fee’ firm will stump up eg 50k xx

Is that the same as the early dismissal my lawyers were talking of? I will ask them about this.

OP posts:
SummerFate · 07/04/2026 20:03

TwistedWonder · 07/04/2026 19:38

He thinks by threatening you with court you’ll offer him a pay off. He’s got £££££ in his eyes

Exactly. He still thinks you’ll offer him something to get rid of him - and for someone in his situation, I can see why it seems like an appealing strategy. A lot of people would give in and offer a settlement.

Please don’t. Tell him you’ll see him in court. He has no case - do NOT blink first.

Sleepneededprettyplease · 07/04/2026 20:02

harriethoyle · 07/04/2026 19:25

Check your house insurance @Sleepneededprettyplease you may have legal expenses insurance on it

It would cover me if I was sueing but not defending weirdly.

OP posts:
Sleepneededprettyplease · 07/04/2026 20:01

Merryoldgoat · 07/04/2026 19:23

How can he afford to sue you?

I remember your previous thread and can’t believe he’s got a case!

He is defering lawyer costs and court fees are a few hundred.

OP posts:
TheignT · 07/04/2026 20:01

Itsmetheflamingo · 07/04/2026 18:21

He’s not going to pay hers is he? That’s the real fucker, even if you win you’ll be thousands down. I hope he gives in soon OP.

Yes I knew someone in a similar dispute. The solicitors ended up with all the money.

Sleepneededprettyplease · 07/04/2026 19:59

BillieWiper · 07/04/2026 18:56

He won't have a leg to stand on the money grabbing fuck. Let him waste his money and he'll have to pay your fees too probably when he loses miserably.

Honestly just hold steady. He's simply a leech and there's nothing on paper saying he's owed anything presumably? I'm sorry you're having to go through this. X

No he has signed to say he is a tenet and also sent an email asking me to fill in a form as his landlord.

OP posts:
Sleepneededprettyplease · 07/04/2026 19:57

ThisIsTheAge · 07/04/2026 18:41

He's such a twat. Of course he wants that and I think he'll go scorched earth to get it. Are you financially prepared for that?

I don't want to but yes. I have better lawyers and a lot more money to fight with if I have to.

OP posts:
Sleepneededprettyplease · 07/04/2026 19:56

Supersimkin7 · 07/04/2026 18:39

He can’t pay if he can’t pay. Courts aren’t solutions, they’re just the expensive way to fight.

In theory he doesn’t have a hope in hell, but can’t you rent the house to him
and he claims HB? Solutions are better than law, says.

He doesn't claim HB. He can't afford the rent. Also emotionally I don't want to be tied to that house or to him.

He was on the list for council housing but took himself off because in his view there was no point and the houses wouldn't be 'appropriate' anyway.

OP posts:
TwistedWonder · 07/04/2026 19:38

He thinks by threatening you with court you’ll offer him a pay off. He’s got £££££ in his eyes

KatherineParr · 07/04/2026 19:36

DwarfPalmetto · 07/04/2026 18:53

Why would she rent to him?

  1. He is a CF and has treated her terribly.
  2. He doesn't have any money.

Edited to add 3. She wants him out because she wants to sell the property and put the money towards fertility treatment.

Edited

Agreed - also who the hell would trust him to pay the rent? He'll pay one or two months and then say he can't afford it anymore. OP would have a nasty legal battle to try and evict him. There is no easy way to deal with this guy IMO - better to have the court case now and get it over and done with.

harriethoyle · 07/04/2026 19:25

Check your house insurance @Sleepneededprettyplease you may have legal expenses insurance on it

Shouldgivethisup · 07/04/2026 19:24

There is a route re co sets that may be possible; you may be able to get an order to compel him to pay your likely costs into court, on the grounds that his case is rubbish. My mate had to remortgage when he was up against a corporate opponent but he won, that was a mean trick they played on him.

given he has no legal docs to prove his claim I think a good lawyer should be able to push for that. He will fold under the pressure and no ‘no win no fee’ firm will stump up eg 50k xx

Merryoldgoat · 07/04/2026 19:23

How can he afford to sue you?

I remember your previous thread and can’t believe he’s got a case!

Ohnobackagain · 07/04/2026 19:21

@Sleepneededprettyplease sorry to hear this. What an absolute cretin.

BillieWiper · 07/04/2026 18:56

He won't have a leg to stand on the money grabbing fuck. Let him waste his money and he'll have to pay your fees too probably when he loses miserably.

Honestly just hold steady. He's simply a leech and there's nothing on paper saying he's owed anything presumably? I'm sorry you're having to go through this. X

DwarfPalmetto · 07/04/2026 18:53

Supersimkin7 · 07/04/2026 18:39

He can’t pay if he can’t pay. Courts aren’t solutions, they’re just the expensive way to fight.

In theory he doesn’t have a hope in hell, but can’t you rent the house to him
and he claims HB? Solutions are better than law, says.

Why would she rent to him?

  1. He is a CF and has treated her terribly.
  2. He doesn't have any money.

Edited to add 3. She wants him out because she wants to sell the property and put the money towards fertility treatment.

ThisIsTheAge · 07/04/2026 18:41

He's such a twat. Of course he wants that and I think he'll go scorched earth to get it. Are you financially prepared for that?

Supersimkin7 · 07/04/2026 18:39

He can’t pay if he can’t pay. Courts aren’t solutions, they’re just the expensive way to fight.

In theory he doesn’t have a hope in hell, but can’t you rent the house to him
and he claims HB? Solutions are better than law, says.

Itsmetheflamingo · 07/04/2026 18:35

impressivelycunty · 07/04/2026 18:28

If he loses, he will have to pay OPs costs as well.

As Op has said above, unlikely and also unlikely he’d be able to pay even if awarded.

TurnipsAndParsnips · 07/04/2026 18:33

You might want to move this to Legal?