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AIBU?

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Original poster

Update to AIBU to refuse Aunt's fwb claim on her estate.

756 replies

Sleepneededprettyplease · 07/04/2026 17:52

Posting here because it is where I put the first thread.

A brief summery is that my Aunt died and her FWB is trying to say that he is entitled to part of her estate because she had asked me to allow him to stay in a house she had invested in for me. Anyway if you want the full story feel free to read what I put on the first thread.

Anyway the main thing is that he is now sueing in the courts. I need a bit of a hand hold please. My lawyers have suggested getting a barristers opinion so I am just waiting for that. I wouldn't even mind if it was possible to just go to mediation but he wants the house for the rest of his life and won't consider anything else.

www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5505433-aibu-to-refuse-aunts-fwb-claim-on-her-estate?utm_campaign=thread&utm_medium=share

OP posts:
CoraPirbright · 08/04/2026 11:01

Best of luck with it OP. I am so sorry you are having so much stress. 💐

DwarfPalmetto · 08/04/2026 10:54

Good luck OP. Even if you win, which seems likely, it's still awful. Experiencing a bereavement and then having to navigate this ordeal can't be easy.

It sounds like your aunt was a kind and generous person and he took advantage of her good nature Flowers

Original poster
Sleepneededprettyplease · 08/04/2026 10:47

TofuTuesday · 08/04/2026 10:41

But the house isn’t part of the aunt’s estate

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No. It isn't. Only for tax purposes.

OP posts:
TofuTuesday · 08/04/2026 10:41

Sleepneededprettyplease · 08/04/2026 07:01

Yes but he is sueing her estate saying that he was a dependent and therefore needs to stay in the house.

Show quote history

But the house isn’t part of the aunt’s estate

Original poster
Sleepneededprettyplease · 08/04/2026 10:21

ThePollutedShadesOfPemberley · 08/04/2026 10:15

This. Get a summary hearing to strike out the claim as a first move. It would be the relatively cheap thing to do and when you win, claim the costs from him. Even if he has to pay a tenner a week, it will cost him.

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I will try for this. I am talking to solicitors again today.

OP posts:
Original poster
Sleepneededprettyplease · 08/04/2026 10:20

Mcdhotchoc · 08/04/2026 09:49

What a knob. Go hell for leather evicting him from your house.
How much money is in the actual estate? Is he really after a nuisance payment?

He seems to be utterly convinced that he is in the right. The estate total isn't huge not even close to a million.

OP posts:
ThePollutedShadesOfPemberley · 08/04/2026 10:15

ProfessorSlocombe · 08/04/2026 09:46

Order to secure costs
Request to strike out claim.
Request for summary judgement.

Show quote history

This. Get a summary hearing to strike out the claim as a first move. It would be the relatively cheap thing to do and when you win, claim the costs from him. Even if he has to pay a tenner a week, it will cost him.

Original poster
Sleepneededprettyplease · 08/04/2026 10:14

Imbusytodaysorry · 08/04/2026 10:07

And what did you do ?

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It was before all of this so I confirmed i was his landlord

OP posts:
Imbusytodaysorry · 08/04/2026 10:07

Sleepneededprettyplease · 07/04/2026 19:59

No he has signed to say he is a tenet and also sent an email asking me to fill in a form as his landlord.

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And what did you do ?

Original poster
Sleepneededprettyplease · 08/04/2026 10:00

Bulbsbulbsbulbs · 08/04/2026 09:36

As a bit of a warning the house I'm in now was subject to a very similar court case before I bought it. I found out that the court costs ended up being £300k.

I really dread this. I don't know how to avoid it.

OP posts:
Original poster
Sleepneededprettyplease · 08/04/2026 09:59

LondonPapa · 08/04/2026 09:35

Why can’t you enforce now?

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Because the legal paperwork signed by the court says late may.

OP posts:
Mcdhotchoc · 08/04/2026 09:49

What a knob. Go hell for leather evicting him from your house.
How much money is in the actual estate? Is he really after a nuisance payment?

ProfessorSlocombe · 08/04/2026 09:46

Itsmetheflamingo · 07/04/2026 18:21

He’s not going to pay hers is he? That’s the real fucker, even if you win you’ll be thousands down. I hope he gives in soon OP.

Show quote history

Order to secure costs
Request to strike out claim.
Request for summary judgement.

Bulbsbulbsbulbs · 08/04/2026 09:36

As a bit of a warning the house I'm in now was subject to a very similar court case before I bought it. I found out that the court costs ended up being £300k.

LondonPapa · 08/04/2026 09:35

Sleepneededprettyplease · 07/04/2026 21:22

I have that order and can enforce in a few months. I think he won't go despite agreeing he would. I dread to think it but it will probably mean bailiffs. I am shaking just thinking of it.

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Why can’t you enforce now?

Original poster
Sleepneededprettyplease · 08/04/2026 09:23

MeTooOverHere · 08/04/2026 08:25

You can do it to scare him though. Get a couple of agents to do a walk through. Let him know that sale is on the cards. Just ignore him when he protests.

He is trying to psyche you out, so you return fire with fire.

Is he an actual tenant or just someone who was given permission to live there? Why is he paying all the bills? Homeowners bills as well as his own consumer use bills?

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Already had the estate agents in. He knows what is on the cards. He had a formal letter from solicitors that when he leaves he is to give the keys to the estate agent that we have decided on.

He is a tenant of sorts but I messed up on the forms so they aren't technically binding. They show clear intent from all parties that he would be a tenant though. I just missed a bit.

OP posts:
itsalltoplayfor · 08/04/2026 08:58

I can force him out in late May
Then this is what you do, bailiffs if necessary. He is a chancer who saw an opportunity for free housing for life and is now going to drag it out. You need to stay strong minded, think of your aunt and your hopes for the future. He is a leech that needs removing (legally!)

Triskellion75 · 08/04/2026 08:52

What an absolute bastard. Don't give in, he's got no chance. He's just trying to force you to do what he wants.

LamentableShoes · 08/04/2026 08:39

Seelybe · 08/04/2026 08:26

Ah, that's the bit that wasn't clear before.
And is presumably the loophole he's relying on.
What a mess for you to have to now resolve. Such a shame your aunt's best intentions are being undermined like this.

Which bit do you mean?

So sorry you are going through this OP. It sounds like whatever happens, he has made it very unpleasant.

Itsmetheflamingo · 08/04/2026 08:34

MeTooOverHere · 08/04/2026 08:25

You can do it to scare him though. Get a couple of agents to do a walk through. Let him know that sale is on the cards. Just ignore him when he protests.

He is trying to psyche you out, so you return fire with fire.

Is he an actual tenant or just someone who was given permission to live there? Why is he paying all the bills? Homeowners bills as well as his own consumer use bills?

Show quote history

im not sure what sort of set up you’re envisioning but he won’t let them in. You really think agents are going to walk around a conflicted property?

thats if he hasn’t done the obvious thing of changing the locks anyway.

Seelybe · 08/04/2026 08:26

Ah, that's the bit that wasn't clear before.
And is presumably the loophole he's relying on.
What a mess for you to have to now resolve. Such a shame your aunt's best intentions are being undermined like this.

MeTooOverHere · 08/04/2026 08:25

Sleepneededprettyplease · 08/04/2026 07:13

I won't get a fractof the value with the state he has it in. The estate agents told me not to do this.

Show quote history

You can do it to scare him though. Get a couple of agents to do a walk through. Let him know that sale is on the cards. Just ignore him when he protests.

He is trying to psyche you out, so you return fire with fire.

Is he an actual tenant or just someone who was given permission to live there? Why is he paying all the bills? Homeowners bills as well as his own consumer use bills?

Itsmetheflamingo · 08/04/2026 08:24

JohnofWessex · 08/04/2026 07:41

I would suggest asking that if he does go to court he first has to put the money up to pay the estates costs if he loses

Ask?! What would be the point in that?

JohnofWessex · 08/04/2026 07:41

I would suggest asking that if he does go to court he first has to put the money up to pay the estates costs if he loses

ThePollutedShadesOfPemberley · 08/04/2026 07:17

Sleepneededprettyplease · 07/04/2026 18:27

I mean I will try and claim them but chances aren't great given he is pretty broke.

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There is no way this will fly. Can you imagine all the cases that would arise if this was successful. Unless he has ratified paperwork to back up his claim, he's mad to even bring this claim.

Does he know what he's getting into with costs etc? If not, someone needs to have a word with him.