I am posting this as I’m not sure what to think about a situation I’m being asked for an ‘opinion’ on
I will keep it as factual as possible to avoid bias.
Person A met person B on a holiday to Person Bs home country. Fell in love and got married (in later life, person A has two adult children)
As person A was close on retirement age, they agreed to relocate to Person Bs home country - as the cost of living is far cheaper and their state pension goes a lot further there.
6 years later Person As adult child has their first baby. Upon seeing how much they’re missing out, and due to their own health concerns Person A and Person B start to look at moving back to Person As home country.
To do so Person B needs to pass an English language test, and they both need to jump through a lot of hoops to get Person B able to live in Person As home country. They start the process though.
6 months later Person B gets a cancer diagnosis, this pushes back their relocation as recovery takes priority over learning English. 12 months after starting treatment they are cancer free but still very unwell. Person B refuses to seek further medical care though and wants to treat holistically in their own country.
Person A now wants to move back without their spouse, they are missing out on their grandchild growing up, and are concerned the longer they wait, the more likely they themselves might start getting age related healthcare issues and not be able to get back in time to be treated by the superior medical staff in their home country.
However this essentially means leaving their spouse behind.
I am the adult child of Person A and am torn, on the one hand I want to encourage them to make the move as I miss them, but I also feel really bad for Person B, who is seriously unwell and would be left alone, I also feel this is going against the whole in sickness and in health gist of their marriage vows.
So is Person A being unreasonable for wanting to come back?
YABU - Person A should stay with person B
YANBU - Person A should come home, and if that means leaving their spouse behind, so be it